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Relationship Hijack And Banter

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by Rihana, Sep 17, 2018.

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  1. Sunshine04

    Sunshine04 Platinum IL'ite

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    :roflmao:
    My mil asked once , why can't C(my husband) buy a car for dad.
    But the car was planned to be bought in C's brother name.
    Oh the never ending drama.
     
    Rihana likes this.
  2. armummy

    armummy Platinum IL'ite

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    The NO should come from NRI sons ...
     
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  3. armummy

    armummy Platinum IL'ite

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    If the property is earned by old man , all need to take precious time
    Out of their lives if they want the property ... that much can be done no..

    if it was NRI son and daughter’s property which they naively put it on parents name , then this is the price they pay.

    my point is many sons and daughters happily engage parents into looking for properties and getting the paper work done, some also do it as pay back to parents ....

    it is lot of work to get papers registered , lots of stuff to be done and you need to be personally be present if it needs to be in your name , other wise no register office will do it or you need special power of attorney for parents to registers on behalf of sons name

    Also more work if it was bought from individuals ....can get into litigation .... plus blame goes to parents if anything goes wrong with property ..... it is much better if you can buy it from reputed builders with a good track record ... the registrations will be streamlined and nri can get it done in limited time ..

    Another option is taking bank loan for buying property , that will ensure it is in your name.

    Better to invest time initially than later suspect and repent ....

    even if parents turn out to be good , getting it registered back in your name will again be more work and
    More money to govt ... avoid in first place itself ....
     
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  4. Laks09

    Laks09 Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    My dad has specifically bought property in three different states in India on my name with just a regular POA I got done. There is no extra running around and no registrar created a fuss. The POA itself was made by a lawyer and sent to me.
    I paid the lawyer his fees and he created and sent the POA. I didn’t run around for getting it attested. Bank notary did the notarization and I sent it back by FedEx.
    Registering property in a child’s name with a POA isn’t all that hard.
    I agree with the bank loan though. The banks will look into property records before issuing the loan and one can get a clean property. It also makes it mandatory for the property to be in yours (and your spouses) name alone. Less ammo for argument.
     
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  5. Sunshine04

    Sunshine04 Platinum IL'ite

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    Yes. It's easy.
     
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  6. armummy

    armummy Platinum IL'ite

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    Key is to get special POA done and then a good lawyer Or good builder if you want it to be smooth ...
     
    Last edited: Oct 23, 2019
    hermitcrab likes this.
  7. nemesis

    nemesis Platinum IL'ite

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    R

    Back in their generations, the young ones didn't become financially independent @ 21. They had to behave, sit with their parents and learn the trade and long after having a family of their own and when elders weakened, assumed control of finances and the family. Large Indian family, burden of taking care of elders shared among all.

    Now that the rules have changed and nuclear family being the norm - elders are in panic. Their only control is ancestral wealth and property bought in their name. The apprehension that they will be abandoned without a security causes them to hold on to it as much as possible. Settling it all and moving to an old age home is not an option either - honor, family name, prestige and what not.

    The result is that after every death in the family, there's an ugly property dispute over division of assets and wealth. Take the case of ADMK after JJ's demise.
     
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  8. Rihana

    Rihana IL Hall of Fame

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    That is the case in most families. But this family's situation is different. The 5 brothers and sisters bought the plots/flats in question after they moved abroad and/or got married, with money earned by themselves or gotten from wife's side. The old man is an expert at these property negotiations. So, all registered in his name. The old couple themselves have farm, house etc, and the whole clan has gold/diamonds that makes me feel I am viewing pictures of Ali baba's cave when my friend shows me the albums on her phone. : )

    I think it is something sadder like denial of one's mortality. There is a finality in signing over the properties. I guess the old man doesn't want happy times like children and grandchildren visiting to be marred by registration paperwork and chakkars to the office.

    Phew. Not my monkey, not my circus. After hearing such stories, I feel less bad about not capitalizing on India's RE boom of 90's (or whenever)..
     
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  9. Rihana

    Rihana IL Hall of Fame

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    Happy to respond in the affirmative. : ) Being a woman of many words have said "you were right" in so many ways. : ) seriously.. verbally, many times by text, the occasional card (if I have some extra unuseable for others in the box from Costco : )), and as the kids grew older, in front of them.
     
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  10. rgz

    rgz Gold IL'ite

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    @Rihana
    Money does not complicate.:blush:
    Humans complicate the situations (esp in this world of maaya/illusion).
     
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