I have been married for a decade, have 2 boys ( 9 and 3) living in US for 10 years and working full time. I am an independent person who can manage everything from cooking, taking care of kids, and do outside chores as well. I have my own problems with my husband and my inlaws...but the recent problem is with my younger BIL and cosister. They got married couple years back and they recently moved closer ( 3.5 hrs drive) to our home in US via my BIL work. My cosister is 23 and I am 31. I didn't ask for any help during her first visit since she was new and just came from India, so Jet lag problems..But after that, they visited almost 6-8 times ( couldn;t really remember)...All these times, the stay would be from Fri evening- Sun evening. The best part is she considers my place as a holiday resort. Not even lifting a spoon or no help...take hours to get showered and get ready, get dressed well but does nothing to help me in the kitchen or helping with the kids. After couple visits, we came to know that She is Pregnant and that adds to it..she is 3 months pregnant now...I know how pregnancy will be, but as an individual I have been active and managed on my own for both the kids...doing all regular chores ....given her pregnancy, whenever they come, i pack them enormous food, Idli batter and so much food.. This last visit really irritated me to the core that made me to vent this here...She literally was lying down the whole time...watching TV in our basement, listening to Music, while i juggle between cooking, cleaning dishes...I have to send my 9 yr old to call her to come eat which she refuses too.. "akka, ennaku pidikalaaa" in a babyish tone. I was pregnant with my first one at the same age she is now... She doen't even ask for namesake whether i need any help or will she ask if i ate something , or she wont wait and say "ok akka, let us eat together".... It is like i am having another child who is 23 yrs old... Her husband , my BIL also never says anything to help me out in the kitchen or wait for her to eat with me.... she was facing so many issues with my Inlaws when she was staying with them before she came to US when my BIL was in UK and then US... I really felt sorry for her and treated her like my own sister both in action and words..but looks like they have taken me granted... couple of good friends/ coworkers suggested me to tell her, " come here and cut this onion and vegetables" , i have something to take care right now"".. but i thought of trying it this time, but never worked..as soon as she done eating, she will go the basement , guest bed room...or the living room couch... I am really irritated, annoyed and tired..even our friends or not very close ppl coming for dinner offers to help out.. I don;t know how to deal with this...need some suggestions from you fellow ladies.