Pain of Rejection

Last week since my DH was out of station, I had no option other than leaving my DD in my parents' house and going to office daily by bus as I am not confident with my 2-wheeler driving yet !! First two days felt exhausted since I have to travel 6 hours a day, 2 buses to my office. Then I started enjoying myself, by chitchatting with people waiting for buses and with persons sit next to me in bus!! It went so extreme that one day I lost myself to some good old songs played in bus and after I got out of the bus at my stopping only I realized that I forgot to buy a ticket!! mg:I could not do anything about it and I let it go just like that!!

Two days went by and that was my last day of travelling since my DH returned home. Lot of absentees on that day in my office and so the work was more Computer Typing and my parents called me twice that my daughter was crying and started asking about me!! When I left the office I just prayed that I should get a seat in the bus coz I was very tired after a week of travelling!! The bus came at last and in a hurry, I got in and sat near an old lady, which was the only seat vacant. Then, only I looked at that old lady who wore a shabby saree. She gave me a smile and I smiled back. Then I noticed she was restless; looking at her ticket and a five-rupee coin and a two-rupee coin she had at hand. First thing came to my mind was may be she is having less amount for further travelling; thought of asking and decided against it thinking that if not, she will surely get offended.

She started talking with me, "See the old lady standing, that saree with large flowers and zari work she wears didn't suit her! We should wear according to our age!! I never wear those kind of sarees and I prefer simple ones like what I am wearing today". I smiled reassuringly at her. Then, she continued "I asked ticket for GP and gave conductor a 10-ruppee note; the ticket was Rs. 4.50, but he gave me a 3-rupee ticket. I am afraid to inform him as already he is yelling at everyone for no apparent reason at all! Those days, conductors used to be soft and these youngsters are behaving as though they are the bus owners," she frowned. I was also afraid and do not want take the risk of conductor yelling at me in front of all passengers, so did not do anything about the ticket!! But, I perceived that the lady was feeling guilty from her restlessness with opening and closing her hands. I could not help but to compare with me when I got down from the bus without even bothering to take a ticket and I admit though I felt bad about it, I was not as much guilty as her.:hide:

And finally my stop came, I was about to get down, so I turned to that old lady and told "Patti! I am getting down! Take Care" she replied with a gleam in her eyes "Do visit me when you come to siddhapudur ayyapa temple, I will be sitting in front of the temple only begging!" I got down with a shock!! So I was sitting and chitchatting with a beggar!! If I knew it before, certainly I would not have sat near her as I am so much cautious about my health!!

But then the thought came, what she would have felt if I ignored the seat near her and stood; would not that act annoyed her? And I know she enjoyed chatting with me asking about my parents, husband, child and giving me her suggestions. She need not have informed me that she was a beggar at last, but she did and asked me to come visit her.

I thought about it. Whenever a beggar comes to me, did I ever try to smile at him/her? I just put a coin and turn my face against them!! :bonk There are even organizations to care and love stray dogs!! There are pets which demands so much of our money and attention! We may be short of coins sometimes, are we short of smile and lovely words? What we are going to lose by just smiling at them when we cross? Of course, beggars do not expect money only from us, I realized!!

PS: Because of extensive travelling, I am ill and took three days off at office.

 

Hai Aruna!

Thanks for your first FB and I am glad that u liked it. What you told was true that the beggars may misinterpret that we are laughing at their poverty! Will keep that in mind . Thanks for putting your thoughts in!!!

 

Hai Knot2Share!

I am feeling a lot better now that too after receiving ur feedback! Of course, six hours of travelling was too much for me, but then since am working at home, i had some change with meeting colleagues and with the contact with outside world!! Thanks for dropping in!! Regards, Janani

 

Hai Ayyan!

Thanks for ur comments!! Ya, by god's grace we are fortunate enough that we are not one among them!! 12 to 16 hours of travelling?? You would have been fully exhausted by the time u reach ur office, I suppose!! Hope you are not travelling that much now-a-days!! Regards, Janani

 

Dear Meenu!

That was so nice of you that you came up with an answer!! You are right coz of the feeling of guiltiness that we could not do anything other than contributing some coins, make us turn away from them quickly!!! Thanks for ur FB. Regards, Janani