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New Age Friendships - Do They Have Expiry Dates Preset?

Discussion in 'Friends & Neighbours' started by crazysans, Apr 12, 2016.

  1. Rihana

    Rihana IL Hall of Fame

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    char-log. :grinning:
     
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  2. BhumiBabe

    BhumiBabe Platinum IL'ite

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    I have noticed that it is more challenging to make new friends, during this time of overdependence to technology. All the friends I have are the ones I made as a young person (hs, college or beginning of career). To make new ones, I hardly have time to spend with them and create a meaningful relationship, because we are both maintaining our previous friendships through social media. I think friendships are taking a hit nowadays because our attention span is so short, and we are trying to balance to many relationships, instead of focusing on creating meaningful ones.

    It's tough to compare the past with the present, because our lifestyles have changed drastically since before. My mom's friends circle were all women with similar aged children and were housewives (until their children entered primary school). They talked on the phone while completing chores, and met for tea and such, during the day. It was impossible for me to do that even when I was a SAHM. Not because I was unwilling, but no one I knew was willing to give up their day to hang out - even the other SAHMs. As a working woman, I don't have the luxury of talking on the phone while completing chores.
     
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  3. BhumiBabe

    BhumiBabe Platinum IL'ite

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    what are "char-logs"?
     
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  4. Rihana

    Rihana IL Hall of Fame

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    char log means 4 people in Hindi. An idiom for "some people".

    along those lines, we have 'log kya kahenge'. What will people say.
     
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  5. Sandycandy

    Sandycandy IL Hall of Fame

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    Hey mrCroc ! How’s Mrs.Croc doing ? Hope married life is going great !!

     
  6. MrCroc

    MrCroc Bronze IL'ite

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    Mrs Croc is doing great, thank you :)

    We moved to Canada and as I suspected distance from IL reduced her stress phenomenally.

    I tend to be busier now but what I lack in time i make up in intensity :) so we are doing great.
     
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  7. happyinfinity

    happyinfinity New IL'ite

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    i do agree with you. The friendships today are rather more for the benefits people can get.
    i don feel the same
     
  8. sumzaya

    sumzaya Gold IL'ite

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    nice thread... i was having the same thought since a couple of months...
    i have/had (donno wat to choose) a best friend in my college and v wer like twins.. v cud talk even with gestures. dint had a fight at all...
    now present scenario is like if i say hi she replies hi hello... thers is no much initiative or to be frank i sometimes feel was she my friend? i think v lost tht warmth of the frndship v had.. she is also a working mom of 2 kids. even me.. 2 kids , working blah blah.. it all depends on priorities... she is active in all social medias updates watsapp statuses so i cudnt conclude that she is busy... it merely means she isnt interested.. so my best friend can be just called as my classmate now. (17 years of frndship :( )thats all.
    Even now i have lots of friends (work place and some social gatherings) actually i love being jovial and like to help everyone who needs it. but recently i felt being used by som1 whom i thought was very gud n all... aftr tht i am being really cautious in choosing n mingling.. i lost that trust .. again there was a shockin incident from another frnd , wen i cracked a joke she felt insulted... gosh i thot she was my gud frnd... i helped her in so many ways (getting her job/ some home based tutions and lot more) .. i dont want anything in return just good relations... but tht incident really keeping me away from everyone and to maintain the distance ... jeeeeeeez.... now i have drawn a circle no one can come inside.(just letting 1 or 2 - they proved they r like me ) ...for others its danger zone...pls keep distance.. now am having peace.. but still.... i love being in good frndships, indeed hard to find true ones..
     
  9. priyanka12345

    priyanka12345 Silver IL'ite

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    yeah now a days friendship is really based on what a person needs at that time. This same thought has come to me since some days and I feel sad thinking may be I am bad that i do not have friends.
    I do not have a single close friend from school/college as all are busy in their own life.

    Recently I started again trying to be social and be friends with ladies from my society. I made a good friend and had good relation for 2 years. WE used to talk a lot when we met and used to go for walks in morning as we are in same society. However soon she got a group of ladies of same school where her son goes and she started talking or calling me only when no one from that group was there or if she needed help to drop her kid at my place for some hrs when she had work. She once told as well that she wont send her kid to other friends from her group because they wont take care of kid etc. also started back biting the ladies of her group. When she had some gettogethers with those ladies she never involved me inspite of asking her to include me in those groups. From then on I felt used that she will only call when she needs me or if no one else is there and now I am maintaining distance.

    I talk to ladies in society but thats not friendship. Its only knowing faces and casual Hi bye etc :(. At work, as projects change the friendships change and no one stays in touch.

    I miss the friendship as my mom has with her school. college and work colleguesand start feeling that I am bad and hence dont make any good friends.
     
  10. sumzaya

    sumzaya Gold IL'ite

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    Dear its not bcos u r not good... Its just one of life's phase i think... There are some sincere frnds n frndships still in this society.. its just v r unlucky... But try to find the positives in ourselves .... Dont think negatively... Atleast u r still being believed as trustworthy and reliable by tht frnd... So it's like as a human u r simply superb.
    Lets enjoy our life ... Stay happy ... If v cant find gud frnds lets be good to ourselves and cheer up our good mind and soul in all possible ways.
    :)
    Goodluck to us... ;)
     

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