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Need your inputs ladies :)

Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by gaja_lakshmim, Jan 7, 2012.

  1. gaja_lakshmim

    gaja_lakshmim Senior IL'ite

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    Hi ILites,

    I am in family way(now @ 4th mon). Next month, I am planning to move to India(5th mon). I have very bad in-laws who always criticize me for everything.
    My SIL's husband(i used to called him as my brother) is my only support in that family.
    He also faced problems similar to mine but now he gets along with my in-laws very well.
    When I told him about my plans to go to my mom's house, he is telling that i should stay in MIL's house atleast till 7th month and this will help us(in-laws n me) rebonding.
    He always thinks good only for me, but I cant stay with my ILs. My FIL is very egoistic and not talking to me for almost a year. I don't want to go there n live with people who hate n criticise me. At the same time am confused what my brother will think if i don't listen to him; cos he is my only support in that family.:spin
    I want to stay calm n peaceful atleast till my labour as I concieved this child with gr8 difficulties.
    My husband did not insist me to stay with my in-laws and left the decision to me.
    Please advise... what should i do now.

    Lakshmi
     
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  2. gaja_lakshmim

    gaja_lakshmim Senior IL'ite

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  3. prabha1

    prabha1 Bronze IL'ite

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    hi

    if you feel you will be uncomfertable with your MIL house you should stay in your mother house.

    Regards
    Prabha
     
    1 person likes this.
  4. orion80

    orion80 Platinum IL'ite

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    Hi Lakshmi,

    If you dont go to your in laws place at all, they might criticize you after your delivery and create more problems.
    I would suggest, go stay with your MIL for sometime and see how it goes. That way, your brother will also be happy that you listened to him. If you are able to get along, stay for a couple of weeks and then go to your mom's place. If things are getting unbearable, then tell that to your brother and go to your mom's place.
     
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  5. JGVR

    JGVR Gold IL'ite

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    yes as orion80 said just stay for a couple of weeks at IL's place and then say some reason to go to your parent's place.Discuss your plans with DH.
     
  6. gaja_lakshmim

    gaja_lakshmim Senior IL'ite

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    Thanks for your suggestions Prabha, Orion and JGVR :)
    Will act accordingly....
     
  7. malarun

    malarun Gold IL'ite

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    Hi Lakshmi,

    I strongly support Orion's suggestion.

    Thanks
    Malar
     
  8. silvertulip

    silvertulip Platinum IL'ite

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    When u reach India, go to ur ILs place and stay there for a week or so as u feel comfy. Then find some reason and go to ur parents' house. From there u can inform ur ILs that you are asked to take rest and not to travel so u will at ur parents for ur delivery and as required.
     
  9. MadhuSharmila

    MadhuSharmila IL Hall of Fame

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    Hi Lakshmi,

    I will suggest you not to stay in your MIL's house since you feel uncomfortable with them. If any issue arises out of it, that will affect your baby. So, you can just think of staying there for a week and return to your mom's place. You can also make your SIL's husband understand that this is not the right time to experiment your relationship with your ILs...

    Best Regards,
    Sharmila
     
  10. mybaby1

    mybaby1 Gold IL'ite

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    hello,

    I would suggest you to got to your mothers home at this point.Its really important for you to be happy and mentally peaceful for yourself as well as your baby.Just talk to your brother and tell him that this is what is good for your baby and you too need some break and you will continue with this topic later..

    If then too he insists just tell him that your docter is finding that i am not getting enough mental and physical rest. she has asked you for that as it is important for the good of your baby.

    he will surely understand this way.

    hope it helps
     

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