Issues Due to a friend

I have a new issue. I am not sure if I am doing a mistake in this. I am sorry for the way to long post.
I have had a love marriage, I do have issues but they are manageable.

I really need to give a background about me and my husband before I come to the issue.

First about my husband, he is a loving & a possessive(about me alone) person. He thinks a lot before he says something or does something so that he does not hurt anyone. Very cautious about anything he does. He takes the ups and downs in life a part of life and never cribs over it. He helps his friends a lot. People can easily take advantage of him due to his helping nature, and he will not realize it.

About me, I am an easy go girl and very independent, I never brood over a thing and take things as it comes along. I am also possessive but I also follow a Live and let live policy. I don’t like to crib about anything that has happened, and like to enjoy each and every moment of my life. When it comes to friends I go out of way to help them but If I know they are taking advantage of me I cut the matter right there.

Both of us think a lot before we ask for help from anyone we try to manage it by ourselves and if it is extremely needed we ask for it.

Now the issue is one of his colleague and his wife, not a very close friend for my husband.
She was working in a different state is US and has recently moved to our location and is now working with her husband; they stay quite close to us. The guy has not yet taken the driver’s license. The place where we live does not have a good public transport facility.
When she moved here I and my husband helped them in shopping, and took them to every shop they wanted to go, in two days we took them to, Walmat, Meijer’s, Costco, Target, Patel brothers, Dollar Tree, Aldi, Ikea, Farmers market.

Every week when we go for grocery and vege shopping we take them with us.
In the morning when my husband goes to office they go with him and while coming back they come with him.

Till this point I have no issues, but the following things I feel they are taking advantage,

If it gets late for them my husband has to wait and pick them up, the result will be I will have to wait till my husband comes to pick me up from the station. I normally cook dinner and lunch in the evening itself this delay upsets me a lot. There is the pace bus facility right from their office doorstep to our house doorstep they don’t use it.

Now this girl is pregnant, so my husband has to drop them in the hospital and again needs to pick them up from the hospital every alternate day. I was not feeling well the other day even then they said u come and pick us she is at home only right. The hospital is just 10 minutes’ drive from home cant they take a cab, it might cost them just $10.

If we go out for dinner without informing them they come and ask why u did not call us. Icant we have some private times to ourselves. If she is not feeling well (even before she was pregnant) they will come to my house and they say we will have dinner here, this happens at least 3-4 days a week.
Dinner is the only time me and my Dh sit and talk. Also after a tiring day in office I find it difficult to cook for two extra people.
When they come for dinner, both guys will be playing or watching movie, she will come and sit in the kitchen and keeps cribbing about each and everything which has happened, I get irritated, because I like to relax in the evening rather then thinking of these things. The worst part is they had visa issue it got sorted out, they were trying for baby they have got it but she keeps saying nothing happens as she wanted.


I still have my visa issue and even my DH, and I am in TTC and still no fruit, but I dont crib about it (pls I am not jealous).

I feel they are taking advantage of us a lot, and are intruding in my privacy. Can’t they use a cab once in a while and go by themselves, this is creating tension between me and my husband, he says don’t talk like this we are just helping them but I feel they are taking advantage of us and feel really frustrated.

Please advise me if I am overreacting or if my feelings are correct then what should I do to avoid them without hurting them.

Thanks
Malar

 

Hi Su,

Even I thought about doing that, but my husband isnot ok with it, he says she is pregnant let us not worry them with this. I even hinted him about getting a license and a car, it will be useful in long run, but no improvement.
I dont a misunderstanding with my husband because of this.

Thanks
malar.