increased demands from inlaws

Stand up for your parents. DONT encourage this gift thing

Next time MIL says "my friends samdhis gave this that..."

Respond "OMG - How shamess are those ppl who took so much from the girls parents. Hope they had the basic courtesy to atleast gift back gold of same amount. Some ppl are soo shameless and greedy mummyji. I really respect you because you are not like them. "

Call your parents (in front of DH) and tell them NO GOLD. If they insist on giving it should just be clothes. Tell ur parents that their daamad is a man of values and principles and he wont like all this demands in the name of gifts.

 

For what???...hafta vasooli. What are these son in laws...shameless gundas.
I would have told some stories of some people who are behind bars for demanding dowry.
Op,tell your parents to send nothing. As it is they will not be able to match your shameless mil's imaginary friends ,so why waste money.

 

In our custom, the first year of festivals both the daughter and son-in-law get some small gifts. All according to parents wishes. I did NOT want my parents to have to buy anything as soon as wedding was over, so insisted on the muhurtham AFTER Diwali and not the one a week prior. By the time the first Diwali rolled around, we were out of the country.

But similarly, when my son's first birthday was coming about, the talk of getting a pair of earrings started. It is the tradition in DH's side of the family to pierce ears (was in our side too, but nobody does it anymore). So I gave in, and told DH that we would tell my parents to get a small pair with a blue stone (my first ear studs were blue stone). MIL on the phone started talking about diamond. I disconnected the phone and told DH that if he even thought of agreeing to it I would show a different side of myself. We dialed back, told them that the line got disconnected and DH told them that since his favorite colour was blue, he wanted to get blue ear rings.

After that once we were in India and MIL started talk about "seer" which is what I mentioned earlier - for the first time the festivals came about after marriage. She wanted it for Diwali again from my parents - this is 10 years after marriage!!! Luckily her SIL was around and told me in front of her - tell your parents to ignore her demands. If she could she would ask for something on a daily basis. You guys have been married for 10 years....so tell your FIL and MIL to get you gifts instead of asking parents.

I almost hugged that aunt!!! And that was the last time she asked directly. She hints a lot, and both DH and I pretend we have severe hearing loss just at that minute.

 

So now the story of the salesman and his wares has got a twist. The shopkeeper sold his wares to the customer for a premium. Then the customer had to stay in the shopkeeper's house and look after the goods, the shopkeeper, the shop and the entire family.

Came festival time and the customer had to pay another instalment for the same old goods. And another festival came along ...... and each time the customer had to keep paying for the goods which despite depreciation only seemed to appreciate in cost.

How may times will parents keep selling their sons in one life time?

OP, next time tell your mil about how your friend's pil are so good they said their son is not a commodity in the market and how they refused to take anything and said their dil was to come to their house only in the clothes she was wearing and the rest would be bought by them. If you can't beat them, join them - meaning play their own game with them. Say how nice it is to see some good, decent, educated people in society.

 

Our so called great culture ....mere Bharat Mahan....