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Husband Treats My 6 Year Old Daughter Like She's His Wife.

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by EagerForInfo, Apr 11, 2018.

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  1. EagerForInfo

    EagerForInfo Bronze IL'ite

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    Hello

    We've been married for 7 years. Me and my husband argue a lot. But why does he discuss matters with my 6 year old daughter instead of me. He's never home. I mean never. Took 2 jobs since 3 years ago. Ok. I understand it might be necessary since people at his current job are getting laid off. But even Sunday Saturday he takes my 6 year old daughter all around town friends houses play dates while I am alone with my newborn. At that time I was pregnant but no communication at all ever. At nights he sleeps in different room saying husband and wife should not sleep in the same room when kids are there. So I'm stuck all alone with kids. Am I over thinking or is this odd
     
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  2. Lavanya30

    Lavanya30 Silver IL'ite

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    This sounds little scary to me, sorry I am not trying to scare you but why would he discuss adults arguments to a kid. Also why does he take your child away all by himself? Something is not quite right here, please check on it.
     
  3. Rosey2018

    Rosey2018 Bronze IL'ite

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    Hmmm are you sure he takes your daughter to friends houses etc? Have a word with her and find out...

    Tell him he should not be discussing adult matters with a 6 year old CHILD. Imagine the stresss and damage she will have. Dont leave him alone with her. He should be helping you raise your children. Not swanning off here and there. He doesnt want to take responsibility.
     
  4. lavani

    lavani Silver IL'ite

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    Your thread is not clear. May be to me. Father taking kid to play date is perfectly fine.

    however he has no right to discuss marital issues with kids and sleeping together is a couple decision and not kids. he has to change behavior and bond with you.

    what do you argue for.

    he is never home. not a good sign. not clear why.

    my h is also is in consulting. he keeps getting his project changed, we are in h1 . so i know sometimes he is super stressed when contract is changing but that does not mean he is away from home all the time. he will come late and then again study some days very late.
     
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  5. NeerjaC

    NeerjaC Silver IL'ite

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    I'm a little confused by your post too. How do you know he discusses your fights with your daughter? If he is never home, how do you even end up arguing?

    It's tough with a new baby, your marital relationship ends up being on a back burner, esp if you are breastfeeding and are the sole carer for your children.

    Why are you not able to accompany your daughter and husband when they go out?
     
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  6. EagerForInfo

    EagerForInfo Bronze IL'ite

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    Sorry I meant he discusses things like (not marital issues but things he should discusss with me ) like honey get ur swim suit from the dryer or things like eat breakfast when I am the one who needs to serve breakfast (from the stove ) so breakfast is on the stove instead of asking me to put breakfast for her he directly tells her he just erases the partwheee he has to convey the message with me. I will tell u more examples when I have time.
     
  7. Greenbay

    Greenbay Gold IL'ite

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    This was your post 7 months ago. In 7 months, how did your daughter grow up from 2 years to 6 years? You had a newborn baby boy then, past forward 7 months, he is still newborn? Are you posting to seek suggestions for your own problems or some one else’s issues?
     
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  8. shravs3

    shravs3 Finest Post Winner

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    :thinking:
     
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  9. Deborah

    Deborah Gold IL'ite

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    OP- if you guys don't gel and argue a lot (in your own words),its understandable if he omits you from the conversation and just talks with her.There is something going on between you two .He has distanced himself from you.On occasions when I and my husband have a tiff which might last a day or two,we keep to ourselves too and just laugh or 'talk' with our daughter too.She is young to have a conversation with but we just entertain her without speaking to each other till our 'fight' resolves.I don't see anything wrong in his behavior other than the fact that something is wrong between you two.You should focus on resolving this problem.Have a heart to heart conversation with him when the kids are asleep.
    Also,people on H1 are usually tense with regards to their jobs.You should understand this and support him emotionally.As it is ,he is doing 2 jobs and still spends quality time with your daughter on the weekends. resolve your problems and everything will be fine.

    Also,please edit your thread tagline.It is very misleading.He is just being a normal father to your daughter.
     
  10. shravs3

    shravs3 Finest Post Winner

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    Exactly even I misunderstood the title ..
     
    Last edited: Apr 11, 2018
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