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How To Identify 'mean' Person Or Camaflouged Person

Discussion in 'Friends & Neighbours' started by Vedhavalli, Dec 14, 2019.

  1. anivijay

    anivijay Silver IL'ite

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    @Sunshine, it's me who ended up baby sitting for months.. they didn't even say thanks... didn't even invite us to their home once after I took care of her for months... more over , the kid who is 12 now, wont even smile at me if we meet somewhere...looks like they were mad that I discontinued the service .. don't care..
     
    Sunshine04 likes this.
  2. Sunshine04

    Sunshine04 Platinum IL'ite

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    Haha it was you.:hello::hello: I remember your case because it was extreme exploitation.
    No worries.
    Anyways atleast your kid got to play with their kid.
     
  3. Caughtinbetween

    Caughtinbetween Finest Post Winner

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    thanks for the clarification . the term 'needy homemakers' above meant different to me.
     
  4. Vedhavalli

    Vedhavalli Gold IL'ite

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    Thanks! I really appreciate the idea.
    Ignore is the word.
    I spoke to the mom, asked openly why she was 4-5 hrs delayed when said 1 hr.
    She said ya told you na, traffic. I said it doesn't take that much time. 4-5 hrs is 150-200miles.
    She didn't have any reply.
    I said, hereafter pls try to keep up the time or at least tell what's the matter.
    She kept quiet . I felt relieved
     
  5. Vedhavalli

    Vedhavalli Gold IL'ite

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    Such people exist everywhere such incidents happens with anyone. Sorry.
    Hope I earned some good karma
     
  6. Vedhavalli

    Vedhavalli Gold IL'ite

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    It was my day ruined, yes I'm analysing to identify root cause to avoid being taken granted in future.
    Working/SHAM is not the topic here, it's about being taken advantage of other's time without prior notice, lying, not considering other's time be it 20 min or 5 hrs. No gratitude or sorry is the context here.
     
    Last edited: Dec 19, 2019
  7. armummy

    armummy Platinum IL'ite

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    Reading too much where not required. I stated my case why I don’t take help from Homemakers because of the labeling that happens ......

    Any war good to know
     
    Last edited: Dec 19, 2019
  8. armummy

    armummy Platinum IL'ite

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    It is good you questioned her but why did you leave the option open for future requests .... ?

    Genuine question ...
     
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  9. Angela123

    Angela123 Gold IL'ite

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    It clearly looks like the acquaintance took advantage of OP. It doesn't matter she got held up due to traffic or party. Would you do this to your baby sitter? probably not because they charge per hour. For the friend, this was free, so she took it easy. May be she got late because of the office party, those things usually run until midnight. But, the way she dealt with Op is not acceptable. That mom has some nerve to leave her kid with a person who she doesn't know very well (for me, knowing very well has a lot of implications). But we are not getting into that now.

    Another thing is, OP, this is a poor judgement from your part to take on a child whom you don't know very well. This is clearly exploitation and please say no from now on. If you don't know the person, say up front you are not comfortable, since you are not friends.
     
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  10. Angela123

    Angela123 Gold IL'ite

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    It doesn't matter. these all are lame excuses. Will you do this if you had paid baby sitter? No, You would get home as soon as you can. If anything happens, she can let OP know about running late. We all have phones!!! If she had no access to phone, couldn't get out of the party or doc appointment, or a serious trouble which she never thought she got into, or was stranded for couple hours with no help, it is common courtesy to tell the person who was watching the kid to say "i am so sorry that I got here late, something happened and I am really thankful that you watched my kid this long, and please let me invite you for dinner someday or make it up to you in some way". I think this would definitely not make OP to think the way she is thinking now. The friend gets the benefit of doubt until she comes to pick her kid. After that if she doesn't explain or apologize, then she is taking advantage of OP's free child care and is not being a good person. Op is feeling used and that is exactly the case.

    You can feel good that she thought of you, she trusted you and thinks you are a person who can take care of the most precious thing for her.

    Why would she be ungrateful then?
    The friend lacked common courtesy, and that is what caused all these issues.
     
    Vedhavalli, Aarushi and hridhaya like this.

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