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How Do You Give Private Time To Your Spouse

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by KitchSwitch, Oct 20, 2019.

  1. KitchSwitch

    KitchSwitch New IL'ite

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    We live in a joint family. Wife is housewife. I work 8 to 6 and back home.
    Wife wants addditional private time other than an hour we get between 10-11 before we go to bed.
    On weekends, I give her the private time she needs. I take her out (without parents) with kid. What else should i do to give her more time ?
     
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  2. MalStrom

    MalStrom Platinum IL'ite

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    There are 4 hours between 6-10. Surely you can carve out some time there?
     
  3. KitchSwitch

    KitchSwitch New IL'ite

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    Thanks, didn't figure that out.
     
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  4. armummy

    armummy Platinum IL'ite

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    Go for a walk in the evening
     
  5. ashneys

    ashneys Platinum IL'ite

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    Go to bed early.

    Start a habit of walking everyday with her either in the morning or evening.

    Out of Saturday n Sunday, you can share one day for the wife n kids,
    one day with parents, guests, etc.

    Sometimes take her out without kids too, with just the two of you.
     
  6. Amulet

    Amulet Platinum IL'ite

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    If the wife does not want to live in the joint family, or wants private time away from the joint family, the husband may go away for overnight trips with the wife (and the child) during weekends.
    Even rentals that are in the same town or not too far by taxi or auto-rickshaw (hotels, air-B&B, stayuncle) might work to give the wife a welcome respite.
     
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  7. hermitcrab

    hermitcrab Gold IL'ite

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    I agree to @Amulet
    Make 2 vacation/ year, compulsory
    One only with wife, no kids and other with wife and kids
    If you want, you can take a third one with just parents
    All three, should help wife. Wife should have more than one hour/ day. FaceTime her from your lunch hour, when it’s siesta after lunch for in laws, a lull at home. Add this time to your work hours and come home 30 minutes late
     
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  8. Amulet

    Amulet Platinum IL'ite

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    AiyyoooOO...
    Don't haggle the number of vacations down already!

    One weekend night, following day, per week in a reasonably nice hotel, with nice mid morning brunch was the original offer. If Monday is a holiday, then two nights in a hotel, skip the outing for the following week can be optional.

    Married people are totally allowed to go out on dates. This is more necessary for people in joint families. Young married couples of the past generation who had lived in joint families, and managed to sneak some intimacy in whatever pseudo private setting they were allowed, went on to produce children, and before they realized what had happened they had grown up (and out :pensive:) to deserve the labels of uncle and aunty: When their bodies cannot cooperate as much with whatever the minds desire.

    There is a time to do what needs to be done. When the OP post said that the wife wants more private time, it is very likely that she was using euphemistic speech. The OP ought to get with the program when everyone is still youthful and flexible.
     
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  9. SinghManisha

    SinghManisha Platinum IL'ite

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    A big round of applause to the man that is making an attempt to listen to his wife :sweatsmile:. @KitchSwitch may your tribe increase !
     
  10. hermitcrab

    hermitcrab Gold IL'ite

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    Ohhhhh....
    I didn’t read ‘private time’ as you mentioned.
    I was reading it more like one-on-one time, romantic time and bonding time- to keep the spark alive, not the actual time the spark putting things ablaze.

    It might be difficult for couples to takeoff for weekend, even in moderate households.

    The FaceTime from office will help the OP and wife to chat, and the hopes up for evening ‘one’ hour.
     
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