Hi All I know the kind of criticism I get of being narrow minded or hypocrite. Call me whatever you want. If anyone can empathise with me please provide a suggestion. My Brother has done his higher studies abroad as per his wishes leaving govt job in India. My father has borne all the expenses till now and even took education loan for his higher studies at the expense of mortgaging our own and even my uncle's(my dad brothers) home. He came back and started searching for job. After 1-2 years span , due to recession , he got placed in to small companies with meagre salaries which is half of what he earned during his govt job. Due to low market, he's continuing and by changing a couple of companies now he reached 20k which is still very basic and on top of it he's surviving in a metro city. My dad is sending him money whenever he asked for it since he's not earning well. Though he has not started his education loan repayments, my dad never questioned him thinking he would take up once he settles well and paying it on behalf of him. We are a lovely family who doesnt much care about money and only concerned about love and affection between us. Btw I'm his elder sister, married and living in a different city. He used to stay with me so that we can save on accommodation expenses. My Dh did support him though they dont get along very well. They both used to mind their own business without interfering with each other An year ago, I happened to notice his late night conversations on phone and his long chats. I got a glance through his phone and came to know about his love story. I passed on this info with my parents who didnt even trust that saying he's very good. Later he was very angry on me and left my home and started staying seperately. We came to know about the gal and got to know she's elder to him and a divorcee and she's none other than my dad's colleagues daughter. My parents called her dad and informed the same. He accused my parents that ur son is trapping my daughter, she's very innocent and blah blah. I got hold of my brother's phone and some chats/pics in which some are in not so appropriate and mailed to her father saying they both are equally involved. But he still denied saying his daughter is very innocent. My parents begged my brother not to talk to her to the extent of falling on his legs. Still he didnt budge. My mom called her and cried to her asking leave my son to which she replied I'm not even talking to him, he doesn't even know where I am etc. We thought everything was fine until recently where my brother started pressurizing my parents that he's going to marry only her. All my parents siblings tried to reason him and convince saying she's from another religion, elder and a divorcee. We came to know from other colleague of my father that she has questionable character. She was engaged and later it was called off due to her character and then married to someone else and soon it turned to divorce and now I feel she has lured my brother. I am not calling my brother a saint but I know he does have a mind which can be easily influenced. We came to know he started smoking/drinking etc which no one in my family does. My father is one example who has never smoke or drank liqour. My parents are crying to me daily. My Dh doesnt know this and i have no intentions to let him know this as I have some problems with my IL's. I dont know how to convince my brother or my parents. Earlier i used to have heated conversations about this with my brother when my Dh was not around. So I havent talked to him lately regarding this. Please do suggest me how can I convince him in leaving her.