1. Have an Interesting Snippet to Share : Click Here
    Dismiss Notice
  2. If someone taught you via skype, what would you want to learn? Tell us here!
    Dismiss Notice

Good Things Happen When You Meet Strangers

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by SGBV, Nov 8, 2018.

  1. SGBV

    SGBV IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    5,032
    Likes Received:
    9,874
    Trophy Points:
    438
    Gender:
    Female
    My FB reminded our friendanniversary today, and that brought back all the nostalgia.

    Exactly 5 years back, I met him accidently in FB. I still don't know what made me accept his friend-request that time. I normally don't accept anyone who is unknown to me. But, I was at the most lowest point of my life, with a newborn in hand and marital troubles back then. So obviously it must have been a mistake. The most sweetest mistake ever.

    It took him exactly 4 months to say "hi", in my messenger for the first time after being connected with me on FB.
    That's when I realized that he is on my friend-list, and wondered how?

    But he was cool on the first chat, like asking some general question related to my work, and appeared very professional.
    I was curious about him; hence looked for further details in FB.
    Just that, I could find 9 mutual friends between him and I, and all of them were high professionals and reputed characters.
    That gave me the confidence to let him be my FB friend.

    In the latter days, I happened to notice his likes and comments on the things that I shared in FB. At times, he used to appreciate me in private chats, and we progressed from strangers to acquaintance this way.

    One fateful day, I had a severe health complication and my Dr suspected that as cancer symptom. In the next couple of days, I was undergoing series of tests and scans to follow up with.
    The health issue, the fear of cancer, and my postpartum hormones basically killed me from inside. Besides, I had no help from my H, as we were rifting apart due to in laws' issues that time. I badly wanted to open up with someone, yet I had no one to listen to.
    My mom, who was already emotionally fragile, had no courage to bear what I had to share.

    When I was awaiting my results at the hospital counter, this man came with a usual Fwd message in my messenger.
    I don't know how, but I broke my heart out to him. I ended up telling him everything about my life, my issues with my H till this latest health issue at one go.
    He listened to me patiently, and assured that I will never get cancer.
    For me, his words seemed like blessings from God above. It soothed my mind a lot.

    So, this is how we met. Though I am a very strong, independent, career woman otherwise, I started up with this person as a very fragile, emotional and vulnerable woman that day.

    He was with me all these while, as a mentor, friend and family in that hospital journey which fortunately turned up as a false alarm. I did not have any major illness as suspected by Drs.

    Within 3 weeks of time, we have become very close buddies. I've got to know all about him, including his relationship failures and private matters.
    While I would counsel him to make up his mind to settle in life, he helped me to re-live my love for my husband. He indeed brought back the hope in me, to get my husband back on my side. In fact, his advice from a man's POV, worked in my case too.
    I slowly faced my life with positivity and courage with the hope that a good friend is backing there for me. It gave a different level of power to control my life.
    At the same time, I felt humbled to know that he has progressed in his life so much after my friendship. We encouraged each other on everything we did, ranging from career, diet, healthy life style, spirituality, humanity and all. We have a great chemistry that connected us intellectually.

    Life moved on, and 5 years passed by. I am yet to meet him in person. It just did not happen!!!
    Till today, I have been depending on the kindness of this stranger, and he never disappoints me.

    Now I strongly believe, that good things happen when you meet strangers!!!
     
    Loading...

  2. salad

    salad Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    351
    Likes Received:
    644
    Trophy Points:
    175
    Gender:
    Female
    God sends angels in different shapes & sizes. This time it was as him.

    Good to see you got a good friend.
    " A friend in need is a friend indeed"
     
    cutebarbie and SGBV like this.
  3. Amulet

    Amulet Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    1,899
    Likes Received:
    3,229
    Trophy Points:
    283
    Gender:
    Female
    The title of this thread is so SO contrary to what I had taught my children. I'd still say it is a good caution to pass on to children.

    Anyhow...
    When one is mentally and physically vulnerable, it is not the best time to go for strangers in the hope to have good things happen to one.
     
    sweetsmiley likes this.
  4. Rihana

    Rihana IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    9,166
    Likes Received:
    22,468
    Trophy Points:
    440
    Gender:
    Female
    Reading till the above part, it seemed like he is a good find, good friend, and so far so good.
    This is worrisome. Absence of physics and in-person meeting does not diminish the risks of great chemistry and intellectual connection.

    Receiving and providing help with specific career, diet, life style, marriage, parenting issues is one thing. Having great chemistry and intellectual connection leads to possibly comparing such friend with spouse. Dangerous territory.
     
    sweetsmiley and vaidehi71 like this.
  5. SGBV

    SGBV IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    5,032
    Likes Received:
    9,874
    Trophy Points:
    438
    Gender:
    Female
    Oh my!!!

    I did not talk about Romantic chemistry here. I can't even begin to imagine this guy as a husband material ;)

    There is something called chemistry in friendship too. In fact, I have great chemistry with my female friends, and FYI, I am not lesbian.
    The relationship between a man and woman begins with an attraction. That eventually ends in friendship or romantic relationship. This is basically called chemistry, as this is believed to happen due to certain chemical reactions in you body.
    Friendship chemistry is not romantic or sexual in nature, but is the kind of attraction you feel when drawn to someone because you like that person and enjoy being with him or her. It is purely platonic and very possible between opposite genders too ...
    Romantic attraction is about the desire to alter the friendship into a couple relationship. It also very much possible among friends, but not between myself and this friend of mine.

    Intellectual connection is about everything, it is also about worldliness, sophistication, emotional maturity levels being close, have/do you read the same sort of books, do you have similar philosophies about life and what it means, what are your religious or spiritual backgrounds and how do you feel about them and can you discuss them openly and honestly, what were your family styles and what are your expectations/ hope/dreams about family and children... and the list is so long...
    This is all good among friends. It doesn't make you physically attractive or romantic by the way.

    Love, romance and couple relationship is entirely a different topic.
     
    Indhradhanu and Rihana like this.
  6. SGBV

    SGBV IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    5,032
    Likes Received:
    9,874
    Trophy Points:
    438
    Gender:
    Female
    Obviously. Even I would caution my children about this too.
    Specifically when you are emotionally and physically vulnerable. I wouldn't advice anyone to hope, or even break down before a complete stranger either.

    Nevertheless, good things happen when you meet strangers too. Specially a stranger's perspective about your life and decision would be the best opinion sometimes.
    And a stranger could offer the best and life changing advice for you too.

    In my case, I wouldn't have accepted this guy's friendship had I been clear in my thoughts back then. It was a mess, and I made a mistake by accepting this unknown guy in my FB.
    But everything happens for good, and I've started to accept this and take life as it comes.

    In fact, last time I met an elderly women from Slovenia (a complete stranger) in my 13 hrs long flight to Turkey. She was sitting next to me, and we casually opened up.
    On our way, we understood that both of us have nearly 8+ hrs of transit in Istanbul airport, and hence we decided to take up a city tour there.
    Spending nearly 20+ together that day, we realized that we had great chemistry regardless of our differences.
    In fact, we ended up sharing almost everything about us in those 20hrs. Now that we are great friends, and connected closely via social media.

    These are unplanned things. They just happen in life.

    I have taken the same route in the past, and had co-passengers from similar background/age too. But never once we felt like connecting. We never plan to find a friend in the plane either.
    So, when something happens, I take it with a pinch of salt -obviously.
     
  7. SGBV

    SGBV IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    5,032
    Likes Received:
    9,874
    Trophy Points:
    438
    Gender:
    Female
    In fact, I am glad that I have found a good soul. Thanks
     
  8. Louise

    Louise New IL'ite

    Messages:
    6
    Likes Received:
    1
    Trophy Points:
    1
    Gender:
    Female
    Totally agree
     
  9. Thyagarajan

    Thyagarajan IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    3,924
    Likes Received:
    4,344
    Trophy Points:
    315
    Gender:
    Male
    :hello:God's ways are strange. He sends SUCCOUR in disguise which could be virtual and strangers domain might include quadrup I mean pet animals and cows and birds too. It includes even eunuchs.
    Regards.
     
  10. lakssubbu

    lakssubbu Senior IL'ite

    Messages:
    28
    Likes Received:
    22
    Trophy Points:
    23
    Gender:
    Female
    Hey SGBV

    It was good reading ur experience. irrespective of men or women, good friends always make a difference. its the similar wavelength that get connected. I grew up with having men as good friends and the gender never ever clicked in between. i guess every relation is about how you deal with maintaining mutual respect... :)
     

Share This Page