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Gone are the days

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by iyerviji, Jul 4, 2009.

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  1. Jul 4, 2009 #1
    iyerviji

    iyerviji IL Hall of Fame

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    Today me and my husband met my cousin brother in the market place. His son is 24 years old and now he is working after finishing his studies.

    So I asked him arent you getting him married. He said let him chose his own life partner then no worry for us. Tomorrow he wont blame us if his partner does not turn out to be good.

    These days parents dont worry much about their children's marriage. Some people leave it to the children. Some try so much to get them married by seeing the horoscopes and when after trying they dont get proper alliance they leave it their chidlren to marry any caste according to their choice.

    Now a days the girls and boys are very particular in everything and before marriage the girls want a well settled boy and listen to what they say.

    Gone are the days when the parents used to get scared to talk to the groom's parents. If they are coming to see the girl they see that all the arrangements are made properly so that the boy;s side people are happy with everything. Some marriages never used to take place because of the dowry. Till the marriage is over the girl's parents are very tensed.


    During my time I remember my sis in law never allowed to go out after the engagement even with my cousins since my husband's family were not so forward that time. Now time has changed noone worries about these things.

    My cousin was sayng that there was an engagement ceremony and noone from the girl's side turned up.
    They thought must be problem in traffic so they are late.
    Later when they phoned the girl's parents they said it seems, two days back my daughter met someone from US and they both have decided to get married. As we did not know how to inform you we did not inform you. The boy's parents told them it seems, its ok you come now and have snacks and go otherwise it will go waste.

     
    iyerviji, Jul 4, 2009
    iyerviji, Jul 4, 2009
    #1
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  2. Jul 4, 2009 #2
    Padmini

    Padmini IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Viji,
    Gone are the olden days! To day's girls are so smart . they want to marry a boy who is well settled with all the requirements. Girls are also well educated and have a good job. But, some girls, fail to have basic courtesy human consideration. . The incident you quoted is one such example.
    In one case, the girl came with her fiancee and introduced him to the parents and to the boy with whom her engagement was fixed, on that engagement day. That is world.
    with love
    pad
     
    Padmini, Jul 4, 2009
    Padmini, Jul 4, 2009
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  3. Jul 4, 2009 #3
    aparajithaa

    aparajithaa Bronze IL'ite

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    I am happy too with the change :)
    even i am particular about it
    until i complete studies and settle i wont go for any such things i said my dad
    and i said i absolutely dont expecte any kind of force in case of marriage from them
    choice of groom is not yours but it is ours i said them :)
     
    aparajithaa, Jul 4, 2009
    aparajithaa, Jul 4, 2009
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  4. Jul 4, 2009 #4
    Mindian

    Mindian IL Hall of Fame

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    dear viji,

    the last incident you mentioned had me :biglaugh:biglaugh..very funny, leave alone getting scared about the boys side they did not even inform the boys side....thats too much..things have really changed no?

    with the new generation it is better to let them make their own choice ...we can only pray that they make the correct choice:)
     
    Mindian, Jul 4, 2009
    Mindian, Jul 4, 2009
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  5. Jul 4, 2009 #5
    ritaroy

    ritaroy Bronze IL'ite

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    Dear Viji,

    Thanks for your excellent post. I enjoyed it. I'm also happy like Aparajitha seeing the change. Even my mom was very srict she set me free when I entered in undergrad study. I had friends. I loved one and married. My mom and Dad also loved before marriage.

    Economy is changing. From fudal culture we're entering to capitalist system (not exactly) in terms of labour selling. We saw before divorce separation is more in economic upper class and lower class less in middle class. But due to the change of socioeconomics now days middle class divorce, separation, break surprisingly increases. I can say it is one of the social indicator telling us market capital is increasing.

    I would say choose your partner before thinking many...it's not only emotion it's life it's your kids life

    Love

    Rita
     
    ritaroy, Jul 4, 2009
    ritaroy, Jul 4, 2009
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  6. Jul 5, 2009 #6
    iyerviji

    iyerviji IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Padmini

    True now a days girls are smart and dont bother about what others will say . They do as they want.

    love
    viji



     
    iyerviji, Jul 5, 2009
    iyerviji, Jul 5, 2009
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  7. Jul 5, 2009 #7
    iyerviji

    iyerviji IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Aparajitha

    You seem to be modern and bold in your decision.

    love
    viji


     
    iyerviji, Jul 5, 2009
    iyerviji, Jul 5, 2009
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  8. Jul 5, 2009 #8
    iyerviji

    iyerviji IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Mindian'

    I was also surprised hearing about the girl's side people. We can leave the choice to the new generation but as you say we can only pray that they make a right choice

    love
    viji


     
    iyerviji, Jul 5, 2009
    iyerviji, Jul 5, 2009
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  9. Jul 5, 2009 #9
    iyerviji

    iyerviji IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Rita

    Good to know you chose your own partner and are happy. No harm in chosing the partner but should be a right choice.

    love
    viji

     
    iyerviji, Jul 5, 2009
    iyerviji, Jul 5, 2009
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  10. Jul 5, 2009 #10
    rajiravi

    rajiravi Bronze IL'ite

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    Dear Viji aunty,

    This is really a nice post.....but the incident what you have mentioned shows the immaturity of the girl and i don't know how the parents also agreed for that decision...she has seen somebody just two days before her engagement and wanted to get married to that guy? and they didn't have the courtesy to inform atleast a day before engagement? ... ......choosing partner on their own is okay.....but, any decision taken on the spot can never be accepted whether it is arranged marriage or love marriage....

     
    rajiravi, Jul 5, 2009
    rajiravi, Jul 5, 2009
    #10
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