Do you share your TTc struggle or fertilty issues with friends?

I can totally understand and relate to it. Infact many are not willing to share their TTC struggles and success also. A very close friend of mine had PCOS when I did not even know what it was. I remember her telling me abot some cysts in ovaries etc. The doctor had told her that she can't conceive till she completes the medicine course. Luckily the very next month she got pregnant. This was 4 years back. Now I have PCOS and I am TTC so I called her for suggestion. She acted as if she had no problem and she never took any treatment. She said she conceived normally and she is fine now. I am happy that she is fine but I felt bad that she was not willing to share.

 

yes it is i hv quite a few
i hv my cousin who had harmonal imbalances, cysts n concieved thru loads of medical help but today " aah my dear DD happened so accidentally we did not want for a few more yrs u know ....n blah blah ...." this is from a doc

then there is another cousin much older than me who has nonidentical twins 17yr old, hers was an ivf the doc who did the proc is a famous doc n we met her .... when we mentioned the reference she told us it was one of the first ivf cases she did n succeeded ..... but talk to my cousin she says ... there was no issues at all only her DH had some issues n he underwent minor surgery n it clicked .... the minor surgery has various versions from vericocele removal to simple circumcision .....:rant

more recent was my neighbor she tells my mom that they were to do ivf next month and were in preparation stage when it clicked out of the blues (definitely a miracle if u conceive during down-regulation)..... now her kid is 1yr+ n she tells my mom that they want the second one also immediately ( i keep wondering it is normal tendency of TTC couple to say one LO is god's blessings it is more than sufficient for us .... unless u hv frozen embies)

guess some ppl once they succeed they paint quite a rosy pic, its a way of consoling themselves

only tip is IGNORE

 

good thread Op

Now even i can think of egs where couples pose as if they had no problems once they have kids....

some how they feel ashamed to admit undergoing fertility treatments...

only way is to ignore

 

yeah even i have a few examples ... and all of them (now that they have a kid) mention that they started "trying" d same month.. and that they were not even planning... One gal even went to the extent to mention that she was even thinking of abortion as it was not a planned pregnancy OMG.. i just feel like giving her back that "baby value d things that u've got the easy way. There r a few people who r not even getting it the hard way"
Actual insensitive people i say.

I agree with the advice given by other fellow ILites "IGNORE"

 

This is a shameful act. However we cant do anything other than being silent or ignoring. Few people hurt in other ways, Infact my MIL told that on her first wedding anniversary she had a kid in hand ( My brother in law) and I dont know why you people are struggling. Since I had a miscarriage she told... well first prenancy you had miscarriage so next time you will conceive. This was not a word of consoling. The way she told added fuel to the fire.

 

There is another friend of mine, whom I know took some medication for PCO even before getting married.But she always use to comment why such things happen to you , I never faced such issues... How long its going to take for us to remind them what they did .... Well its better to avoid TTC talks with such people. I always tell.. 'We are yet to plan' to those people whom we know are happy when we suffer

 

I didn't quite follow the original post...

I don't think there is anything wrong in not telling everybody about the ttc struggle...it's a personal topic and there ppl who can share openly and there are ones who can't...it may not be about being ashamed or anything...ppl may not be comfortable to discuss it...

There are more insensitive ppl around than sensitive ones ...and it's difficult to distinguish them...why tell every other person about your problems and give them another topic to gossip about...

There is no right or wrong here and it's a matter of personal choice..no point getting angry with such ppl..u may not know what others problems they may have...ignorance is best policy ...

I have been asked that question so many timesby so many ppl....insensitive and sensitive all types..but I don't care about them..neither do I go on telling them that I am struggling...it's my life and I am handling it with whatever problems I have....

I would simply smile at all such ppl