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Do Ageing Impact Parenting?

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous in Parenting' started by Anusowmyan, Jul 12, 2017.

  1. Anusowmyan

    Anusowmyan Gold IL'ite

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    when the parents are in the age group of 40's, does it create any impact in the style of parenting? having children in the late age, when the parents turn 43, the child is of 3 years old, can they bring him /her up in the same way as like the parents in their 30's.

    please this is not to hurt any one, I have come across a similar incident, that's why I want to clarify &discuss this issue with all the IL friends.
     
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  2. VaniVyas

    VaniVyas Platinum IL'ite

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    I think they will be better parents. With ageing people become more matured and confident.
    If they are financially stable then I dont think there can be any issue. On the other hand, if they r not, education, marriage and retirement planning may become cumbersome.
     
    nakshatra1, guesshoo and anika987 like this.
  3. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    Honestly feel too young parents or older might be a bit tough.

    Though physically active,younger parents Atleast till the initial years get frustrated as they lack patience but there are exceptions.Plus point it,job is done early so they are free .My 40 year old friend who is a mom to a 19 year old complains of too much free time :)

    Older parents above 40 also feel frustrated and not necessarily are they patient.Physically many get tired but again there r exceptions..

    Finance and help also play a major role

    Best age to get pregnant is late 20s to early 30s.
     
  4. deepthik2017

    deepthik2017 New IL'ite

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    I totally agree with VaniVyas. I see live example in my house. My parents take care of my children much better than they took care of me and my brothers :) . Its age that gives maturity and patience.
    However parents are parents at any age and are always there for kids no matter what.
     
  5. Anusowmyan

    Anusowmyan Gold IL'ite

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    thank you vani vyas, anika &deepthi for putting forth your thoughts. so, there are both plus & minus in the cycle of age & parenting. The pair who I come across are financial strong & hope they planned for both the child's education &their retirement.

    regarding the help from the parents or in laws seems tough as they are all are above 70.
     
  6. Nonya

    Nonya Platinum IL'ite

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    Barrack Obama was raised by his grandma. That is how he went bad and smoked weed; but then, he met Michelle, and she reformed him, and let him become a President of a country.
    This shows that people raised by older parent (or grand parent) will marry a strong character, and s/he will make something of that person.
     
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  7. Anusowmyan

    Anusowmyan Gold IL'ite

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    Great news ! thanks nonya, all we want is that children should settle well in their lives.
     
  8. ashneys

    ashneys Platinum IL'ite

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    Financial stability is a very important point to look at when planning kids after 40. If they have a kid at 45, when they are 60, the kid is jus 15 n still at school. So they will still have to provide for them And imagine the teenage tantrums they have to handle at 60.

    Good thing is they will have more patience but at the same time may not be as energetic.

    But despite the challenges, we human beings are good at adapting, the kids will grow n settle well, don't worry.
     
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  9. Anusowmyan

    Anusowmyan Gold IL'ite

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    thanks ashneys, even I am worried about the teenage issues & first of all in the school days itself the children will start to think of their parents as bit elders when compared to his friends & parents too need to update themselves in every sphere to help the child. In addition to all these energy levels to be maintained well.
     
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  10. SGBV

    SGBV IL Hall of Fame

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    Certainly age has a great impact in parenting. There is no black and white answer to this.
    When parents are very young, their lack of experience in life affect their parenting style. Although they are energetic and hopeful about life, they get stuck until they are settled.
    They need time to settle in life, because this is when they would be probably running after their studies and career. So a new addition in the family makes this even stressful.
    Their lack of patience, inexperience in life and immaturity can fuel the fire. This can have serious impact in their parenting style.

    Whereas the older parents probably have a very matured approach towards this. At the age of 40, they would have been probably settled in life (studies, career), and became wiser with age.
    Their patience, maturity, knowledge and understanding about life helps them shape up their parenting.
    However, at this age they would be starting to feel unhealthy. All the health issues begin at 40s; hence it takes a toll in their lives.
    Their lack of energy makes them impatience with their hyper active young kids. Parenting needs loads of mental and physical energy.
    This is the age when you start to feel old (the grey hair, shaggy body, belly fat, baldness etc); hence you become negative about your future. Particularly about the future of your very young kid.

    So, on average the best age to become a parent is 30-40.
    This is when you learn to be matured, and parenting teaches a lot here.
    This is when you are settled, and becoming a parent completes your family
    This is when you feel young, yet you have so much experience in life.

    This is just my opinion
     
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