Appreciation Vs Expectation

Shri Viswa's thread on appreciating Ilites persuaded me to do some ramblings on appreciation and expectation.

It is quite a different feeling, expecting something, as compared to appreciating something. In one case, you feel owed, and in the other you feel awed. Think about that for a moment.

Human mind longs for appreciation and all cannot be true followers of'Karmanyeva Adhikarasthe, na phaleshu kadaachana".Even a person doing pravachan on this subject expects appreciation as to how he dealt with the subject.It is just like a sage longing to leave all the desires, which in itself is a desire.

Personality Development texts advise that those who have expectations, should consider exchanging that attitude for one of appreciation instead.

When we have an expectation, we are placing a demand on the other person or persons.

Appreciation had been order of the day, when literary talents were swinging at the top. Even while appreciating, there were comparisons. For example, Mahakavi Kalidasa,Dandin, Bharavi and Maagha -all were great poets and were appreciated a lot.But Maagha somehow was not very popular.
To give more credentials to Maagha and to give him what he deserved, the following poem was circulated.

Upamaa Kalidasasya
Bharaver artha gauravam,1
Dandina; Padha laalityam,
maaghe santhi trayo gunaa;11
( Kalidasa is known for his similies;Bharavi is famous for course content;Dandin is noted for his beautiful exuberant style and In Maagaha we find all the qualities combined.)
Thus they started analysing and doing research works on upamas of kalidasa, the noted significance of Bharavi's verses, the literary style of Dandin compared to the All-in One Maagha.
All became famous.
Even among Ilites there are many brilliant scholars who convey great ideas and lengthy concepts which you can't find even in respective texts.It is the essence of so much research.Some write interesting narrations of their past experiences with some spicy masalas added.
Some thrill us with humour and give entertainment and relaxation.
There are moving real time incidents which are dealt with samayochithabuddhi and wisdom that can be an eye opener to many.
There are people who participate with beautiful responses which sometimes excel the original writings.
There are thousands of others who are silent readers.Each one has his/her own role to play in the team work.

By appreciating the things others do or what they write,it does not mean that one must be a door mat and simply accept whatever they tell. There are still standards which must be met.

But if all we ever do is to yell and never praise, our life may go waste.

Lectures about expectations or statements of appreciation for things done?Which weighs better?

We can take a few minutes to assess ourselves.
where in our life we tend to demand or expect things from others without expressing your appreciation at least as often. We can trace all the past incidents relating to our life, from family to friends, workspot to society, and everything between.

How often do we expect and how often do we appreciate?

Definitely we can trace a design or pattern in our behaviour.
We can easily assess whether we are consistently more expectant and less appreciative?
That literally means that we have a tendency to have mastery over others.This may cause lot of administrative problems, if we are in charge of any situation.

We can do really something to tone down the expectations and demands, and work a little more appreciation into our lives.We can take even a real challenge, try to take a whole day with no expectation, and respond to everything with appreciation.

It can be challenging, but it is also quite rewarding. Even if we mess up a few times, it will still be one of the best days in our life.

There are poets like Srinivasan or Pavitra or Periamma .They deserve the praise saying "Your poetry is so powerful, you put into words exactly what I struggle to convey."

We can also appreciate the fiction writers like Rrg ,Geetha or Thyagarajan “I love how deep and rich this character is. He’s very relatable, and feels totally real.”
A simple expression like
"I look forward to your writing"or

"I wish I could write like you.'may work wonders.

Definitely it is a win-win situation. It is always comforting for the author to know that he can reach out to people and find the words they can’t seem to put together in their minds.

When readers are stated to fall in love with the author's words,he feels like the readers are getting to know him personally.Possibly his words can help the readers out of the crisis or lead them to make the right decisions.

I am not talking about literary
articles alone.There have been articles about 'investment planning' and 'investment strategoes' which are of practical significance.
We have been highly benefitted out of Smt Lakshmi's advices relating to manage the children of alternate skills.It was a psychology text with more practical hints.

We see so much of the negative side of life in the media that it is refreshing to have a positive report on the good things that are happening.

Some of the articles seem to be really a great motivator for many students who need a little extra push.
Not even a single day passes without thinking about Gauri's famous ending lines

"A little bit of slope makes up for a lot of y-intercept."

Jayasala -42

 

Thank you Srinivasan Sir,
jayasala 42

 

Dear Viswa,
As always you have added more value to my writing.You are right.s long as 'appreciation' kindles pride, it is ok. There seems to be a very thin line of demarcation between'I can do' and 'no one else can't or may not do'.When you aim to be the top scorer or ranker,the underlining idea is to excel everyone resulting at least in a notion that nobody should be above you.Many of the educationists feel that the child ,however deserving, should not be allowed to top the class always just for this reason.May look odd.But that is the hard reality.

 

Thank you jskls madam for your kind words and encouragement.