Anyone There Separated Due To Intimacy Issues?

You don't need a separation for "Pleasing yourself" !

 

For me it looks like you are feeling more insecure than dissatisfied.
As a man, I can assure that he wont abandon his family, unless it is huge mental torture coming to home.
Just make sure you keep mingling in all the social occasions, and keep praising him, he wont even dare to look at another woman.
For men it is more about trust and respect. You respect him way more than everybody less he will be just behind you
Yes he may occasionally hit a strip club or so, but sure that happens, just ignore those things.

Also try new things. For me it just looks like you are not able to communicate properly.

 

How did you have children without having intimacy? What advise you expect from IL ites? Do you want to go for an EMA ,without hurting your partner?

You have two children and has no means to support them. Children are your responsibility.
Your priority in life now is your children. Everything else is secondary. Don't you feel guilty about your children?

 

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You mentioned that you are expecting 2nd child. So why are you so much bothered about sex issues right now...
Better still...have positive thoughts during this period. Instead of planning to separate from ur DH..plan ur life after you give birth, how to maintain equilibrium between two kids so that 1st kids doesn't feel neglected and left out.
Please talk to your husband about this issue.
Consider yourself very very lucky that you have a stable married life with kids and good finances. There are so many ladies out there who suffers from terrible marriages.

 

I think its just a void after children...u ll find more intomacy after few years trust me..

 

Trust me,this sexual phase is something people go through..sometimes this happens in midlife crisis.once you have another kid,the baby will keep too busy!
Secondly,you can go for counseling or start intimacy with your husband from your side.honestky,I may sound old fashioned but divorcing for this intimacy reason without trying out other measures or giving yourself some time is not right

 

Your posts are a bit confusing. But in all, I feel like you are worried that your H may initiate separation proceedings because of lack of intimacy. (sorry if I am wrong)

Why do you think he will get what he wants outside? DO you have reason to believe something is going on behind your back? Is it just insecurity? I am betting it is the second! You are pregnant, will soon have two kids, lack intimacy (for now) which is normal given that you have another child. It looks like a case of "Idle mind devil's workshop" Think positive thoughts. Engage with your Husband. Intimacy is not just sex, it is also holding hands, little kisses and bear hugs. Go for walks. talk your heart out. Share your feelings, your thoughts, fears and worries. your plan for the future, your children's future. Listen to his. Get the love-bird spark between you both and all will be fine.

P.S. I know this is difficult given you have another child to take care of, but try to make time.

 

Hi i was in that situation b4,i kept wondering how can a man go on without sex and intimacy for a long term,and i kept myself busy by watching ****,pleasure and chatting casually etc,but his ego took a severe beating,although it was his libido that went downhill,he wants to pursue divorce saying lack of intimacy as the reason,also he would be treating me nasty for no reason and as soon as he got a high paying job and climbed up the corporate ladder,he started going thru dating sites and wants to date and dreams of getting a new life,saying he is bored of old life and so on,having said that ppl can be happy without sex or remain in a long term relationship for long,i have known ppl with cancer,chronic illnesses,no libido etc live happily with their spouses.My advice would be to get a couples therapy,or switch on a late night video yo get in the mood or go to a resort,and take some time to yourself,or even a cruise,if money is no issue.There are lots of ways to connect.

 

I agree. On one had you are thinking of separation, at the same time you went ahead and got pregnant with another child. Why are you bringing children into this world so irresponsibly? And then you want to deprive them of father's love, a normal childhood, and of-course financial security. Just so you can please yourself without guilt?? Nor do you have any intention to remarry- so you think it's ok to deprive your children of father???
I don't want to judge you for wanting intimacy and it is important in marriage, but you went ahead and created problems for 2 innocent kids- that's the issue.
You can yourself see that there is no solution other than solving the issues with your husband.