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Aadi Masam for newly wedded couples :-(

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by bhucat, Jul 15, 2012.

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  1. Jul 15, 2012 #1
    bhucat

    bhucat Platinum IL'ite

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    I feel so sad to start this thread actually, Sorry newly wedded IL's - i can understand the emotions what you have at this time. As i felt so sad and literally cried when i went to my mom's home for Aadi maasam. But within a week, my DH was not feeling well (may be because of seperation anxiety :)) and his throat was fully gone with severe cough and cold. In addition to this he had high fever. For the first two days i met him after my office hours in the railway station. But from the third day onwards his health was not better. So without any second thought i came to his house and taken leave for office to take care of him (he was along with his parents only :)

    On that day evening, my DH told his parents that - let her stay and go tomorrow as it was too late (my mom place is in the same area only :)
    My lovable MIL never objected and said OK but with one condition - "You should not lock the door in the night". This sounds so embarrassing but understood the truth only after several months. Paavam my dear MIL is a lady of old years thoughts and want to follow the traditions. But for my sake for my DH sake, she let me to stay in the same place. I feel so happy that atleast i can take care of him for the whole month.

    This was my Aadi month experience. But truely speaking after 4 years of marriage i now feel that every girl should go to their moms place for the complete one month time as they can get this much sufficient time only for such few occasions which should not miss the chance !!
     
    bhucat, Jul 15, 2012
    bhucat, Jul 15, 2012
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  2. Jul 15, 2012 #2
    Viswamitra

    Viswamitra Finest Post Winner

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    Dear Bhucat,

    I don't believe in superstitions. It is my understanding the elders don't want young couple to be together in Aadi because they believe a child that is born in Chithirai masam with a birth star of Chithirai will be bad for the child's father. I personally don't believe in something like this.

    I am against blaming the daughter in law for something that happens in the husband's family after the marriage or blaming a new born child for something that is going wrong in the family. This is ridiculous.

    Viswa
     
    Viswamitra, Jul 15, 2012
    Viswamitra, Jul 15, 2012
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  3. Jul 15, 2012 #3
    Shanvy

    Shanvy IL Hall of Fame

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    I think it all stems from the fact that if a lady conceives in mid-july to mid august, the baby is born in April-may which is peak summer (or Agni Nakshatram in Tamil) which is difficult time to manage a new born or a new mom..and the fear of bad luck to the father was brought to make people cautious..yet i know many april/may born people around me..

    Coming to some superstitions at least like the above, i think they had their own logic, only we fail to understand or accept without the reasoning...but i condemn that certain stars are bad for the mil or fil or the bil while matching for marriage..
     
    Shanvy, Jul 15, 2012
    Shanvy, Jul 15, 2012
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  4. Jul 15, 2012 #4
    aminroop

    aminroop IL Hall of Fame

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    well i wasnt really bothered with such rituals except for the fact that during internship i was posted in the labor ward during april-may and was told that we wont have too many deliveries. but alas, that wasnt true!!! we had a pretty hectic month. :(
     
    aminroop, Jul 15, 2012
    aminroop, Jul 15, 2012
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  5. Jul 16, 2012 #5
    bhucat

    bhucat Platinum IL'ite

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    Dear shanvy, Yes u are right !! :)

    Dear Viswa sir, here comes the truth behind the seperation of couples during Aadi month. I read this in a website at the time of our Aadi month. 1. Ayurvedic reason : This month is consider to be a weekest month in terms of disease sprending due to climatic change. Diseases spread through water and air which is not suitable for new wedded couples as it may cause defective issues and other complications.
    2. Religious Significance : this month is called Dakshinayanam (the sun traveling towards the south). It means the sunset for the celestial beings (gods of heaven).So people should spend their time in religious activities. This also applicable for Marghazhi (Andal-Krishnan) and Purattasi (Perumal).
    3. Also as Shanvy said, during the delivery ie in the April - May, it is in peak summer along with that there is a chances of spreading contagious diseases like small pox, etc, which is not good for baby.

    Hence i sometimes think that in olden days people laid down some systematic life system which they would have know the real fact/reason but they did not reveal it. Nowadays, when we go deep into the traditions and analyze then we can understand that this is not superstition or foolishness to follow these customs.
     
    bhucat, Jul 16, 2012
    bhucat, Jul 16, 2012
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  6. Jul 16, 2012 #6
    Dancer

    Dancer Silver IL'ite

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    I have too heard of similar reason that during aadi, the couple is kept separate in order to avoid the baby being born around a particular time.

    My question is this: Then, shouldn't it be followed for every aadi? Why only the first aadi? Is it ok if the baby is born in April-May of the second or third year of marriage? :hide: I think I just made enemies with the above suggestion :biggrin2:
     
    Last edited: Jul 16, 2012
    Dancer, Jul 16, 2012
    Dancer, Jul 16, 2012
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  7. Jul 16, 2012 #7
    periamma

    periamma IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Bhucat as our friends said it's very hard to bear the summer.Another reason is in olden days we had some home made medicines which strengthen our uterus and the whole body.In summer this medicines give more irritation and that's why the newlywed couples are separated in Adi.
     
    periamma, Jul 16, 2012
    periamma, Jul 16, 2012
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  8. Jul 16, 2012 #8
    periamma

    periamma IL Hall of Fame

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    Hi Dancer good question.People are matured to know the reason that it's not good for health and keep distance in their own house.
     
    periamma, Jul 16, 2012
    periamma, Jul 16, 2012
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  9. Jul 16, 2012 #9
    Shanvy

    Shanvy IL Hall of Fame

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    haha dancer, even as i wrote the fb, i knew somebody out there is going to ask this question..i believe, the parents love to have their daughter for one month to be pampered, it is possible to do all this only during the first year mostly, and the next year, the daughter may or may not want to go for one month..(she gets deep into her marital role/bliss..)and the month the In-laws get a lot of goodies in the first year in the name of tradition..

    and i can also say it is not followed much these days maybe a few days thats all.. it is practically not possible if the couples are staying abroad.. and moreover with the climatic changes, every month is hot/cold and diseases are not contained in one place..

    In fact there is more to AADi than just this.. i have written my thoughts here.
    Weren't they great planners - Blogs - IndusLadies
     
    Shanvy, Jul 16, 2012
    Shanvy, Jul 16, 2012
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  10. Jul 16, 2012 #10
    monifa13

    monifa13 Bronze IL'ite

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    I fully agree with you all Shanvy, bhucat and Periamma. I do believe that this has something to do with the hot, hot month of Chithirai but not with the star Chithra. My birth star is Chithra and I have been very lucky to everyone who I have come across so far in my life.. I believe in the wisdom of our elders and have followed it without questioning. Nothing went wrong when we followed our ancestors' footsteps and why would I want to think I am much more intelligent than them?
     
    monifa13, Jul 16, 2012
    monifa13, Jul 16, 2012
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