I am glad you decided to take your friends suggestion. Taking a major decision under depression is really not a good idea. I hope therapy helps you.
@Laks09 is 100% right. My ties to India are only restricted to my parents. All the family members from the older generation whom I immensely valued have passed away. The new generation is not big on emotional attachments. What makes a place special are the people, the interactions and the emotional attachments.
I meant to say, I go by myself once during the school year and take kids in summer. It helps going by myself, even if it is for a week. I loved living in India and go to spend time with parents and catch up with friends. Once kids are older, mom can easily take a one week/ten day trip sometime during the school year when there isn’t much going on. I prefer the first week of April(mangoes and jackfruit season) or October(weather is good). During those weeks, not a lot happen in school and DH can easily manage. A lot of cheap ticket options are available during those days(non peak travel time) and without kids I can go with not much luggage. My hand luggage will have only a pair of change or clothes and toiletries for the flights. My checkin bag is usually half empty. I did go once without one and came back buying a suitcase because mom packed stuff, so now I take a bag just for my mom to send stuff for us. I tell myself that these trips will happen as long as parents are around and we both make every effort to go.
For me as of now..I would go in summer at least two or three weeks with kid almost every year..I need that to make me go though the next entire year in America. After maybe when they my kid leaves to,college,if I still have the passion for INDIA..I might even make couple trips a year Life is funny...nowadays my only ambition,passion,love is to go to INDIA as possible..
@mangali and all other respondents in this thread. Either way it results in doom and gloom. If mom is happy in India her us citizen children can’t be happy in India (factoring in their present US schooling And culture). 2. There is enough discussed in depth by fellow IL’ites in this thread as to what should be uppermost in the mind of OP - with thrust that children education and their mind set would get topsy turvied in the event of leaving US FOR GOOD. No decision should be taken when one is deep or somewhat deep in depressed mind. Separating kids from parents may affect psyche in their later years. 3. Cost of living is high wherever one lives. Attempts to be made to overcome alleged or real depression in OP by taking recourse to yoga, meditation and or other diversions. 4. A medical college admission for us girl almost withdrawn for want of Indian citizenship certificate by a high court order recently. Read it in the link: Us Born Desi Girl Student - Doctor Aspiration In Doldrums Write in a note book merits and demerits pros and cons to evaluate the ultimate impact. God bless.
I totally agree with @Laks09 (well, I agree with her on almost everything ). We go to India every year. I prefer my husband to go with us every other year so I can spend more time with friends and family without worrying about him getting bored. Kids love going to India so far. My siblings are in India and we are very attached to each other. I am hoping that the India trips will continue even after my parents are no more.
I love sorted people! That's just so clear. Had to edit this to include @nuss reply to this thread ( just read it after posting the above), because i just commented on her reply o n the parallel thread too! Priority and clarity ... both put you both on a pedestal @Laks09 and @nuss
There are many good advices given here about why you shouldn’t move back to India and I agree with them. I think you have decided to stay put in USA for now and if so that’s the best decision. Good luck.
