How Much Should Husband Help In Housework/childcare?

How many people consider woman as a human being?? Very few!! If they had considered things would have been different. Since now woman are raising their voices against such things some call them as Feminists and blah blah..
But if women were treated the way they are supposed to treat why will they fight ? Why will they raise their voice ??
All they think is woman is a multitasker? let her do all the work.. Let her slog in office and inspite of that let her do all household chores...But contribute finances.. Who cares if she is tired ?
Woman wouldn’t fight or become so violent if she is treated with love and respect from all the family members equally. Be it inlaws or husband !

 

U ppl don't fix the household chores on alternate days...u give him to do job when he is feeling good...likewise if u feeling tired mean ask him to do...for cooking u can hire a maid...that's a big relief for working women...playing with children is not a chore, it's our stress relief too..

 

In my experience, it has to naturally come from the husband man to help you. The more you ask or push him to do, the more he is going to pull away from household chores. In the early days of my marriage ive asked my husband for help and he never stepped up. Like yours, he too pointed that you earn less than me and dont have a demanding job as mine so don't expect me to be a part of household chores. Doing the salary comparison was RUDE. But with time I realised that because we women ask for something, the guy's mind receives it as a "demand" from us. They were never tailored to be a part of kitchen chores so it's quite natural for them to give silly excuses to run away.
In your case, make sure you hire a maid if its very difficult for you to handle everything on your own. But insist that husband has to give daddy time to kids.

 

Very few ? In the previous generation, women were passed on from father, to husband, (and after he dies) to son. They had far less opportunities for a training to be independently viable, and had to depend on someone else. They had to know their bargaining position, and act accordingly. There were a lot of clever women who could use Panchatantra, and knew what fights are winnable, and how. Some of those women raised us.

Fight With Husband
The linked article in that post offers the possible solutions, including when and how to fight.

 

You dint get my point !!!
That’s wat I’m trying to tell most of the woman are considered only for that .. To increase the generation..
In most of the houses they are least bothered about what is her wish ?? What she wants to do in life..
Not all houses treat men and woman equally ! Even now there are families who are torturing woman for not bearing boy child .

Those days not all woman were exposed to outer world . Her duty was only to take care of the family and house. Most of them where happy with it.
It’s not the same case now..
Woman are equally competent with men and sometimes beyond men too..
So these days they don’t want to be just puppets in the hands of inlaws and husband. She wants to get some life apart from family too

 

I don’t think both of you are abusing each other, but the way he’s comparing n conveying it is wrong. And house chore disputes can add on n start building resentment, n that’s why hes starting to sound like that.

Solution:
if you can afford, hire the extra help n sort out this issue for the both of you. Use this opportunity to reduce your house work load too. You both can use that extra time to spend for yourselves n your kids. Happy couples = happier parents too.

If can’t afford, reduce work like very limited dishes usage, no elaborate cooking on daily basis, avoid some work, don’t attain for perfect home, etc.

 

I have been there. Done that all. I know the kind of stress working women has to face. Please tell him you need his help calmly but refuse to take no for answer. You are not asking something he can't do. And you are definitely not abusing him for asking hand in household chores.

 

Me too.. sailing in same boat. But the reply was , he knows but he wont help. I knew and I dont touch even a simple single thing. Moreover, it became a big stress. Could not concentrate on the work , no play time with children and am using them for chores etc etc. Feeling low with disgusting pain in heart during these times.

 

Hey ,
Things are changed so much from the past.. now, atleast in indian urban life's men are trying there level best to contribute and help there partners without asking also. Personal i will give my wife to lead the all household work, but I will remain the fuel for her, by help her in each and everything. I dont wan her to stress out in household works.
So my personal point is that, let the women lead and decide how things to be done with the support of their partner. That will be fair and fine.