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Horoscopes And The Reality

Discussion in 'Astrology Numerology & More!' started by SGBV, Jan 29, 2018.

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Jan 29, 2018 #11

SGBV IL Hall of Fame

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MonikaSG said: ↑

I too faced such situation. There is so much pressure from society then from parents to get married that girl cannot say no or can't take the risk to get married to her own choice. I met many weird ones too and said yes to them too but I was lucky that my match to any one of them got stuck in one point or the other. I think its a gambling with or without horoscope one cannot judge in advance what will be the future. If she like someone then she will always feel for him in all the low moments of her married life. You cannot help her too as if you do so then if the decision goes wrong you too will feel I should not interfered at that time. I feel everyone get only the one that is made for them. And in future if it doesn't work out then somewhere we are also responsible for that.
Click to expand...

I understand the gambling part very well. Even in love marriage, there is no guarantee that your life partner turns out to be the best match.
It is all about the two partners to handle it.

But horoscope in this case is beyond gambling. It is not the uncertainty, but she is certain about few differences of this prospective groom.
She knows that his education and profession is much much lower to her. She understands that he is of different background, and it may bring loads of pressure and differences on a fairly modern -working-girl like her after marriage.
These are the things that we must check, even though there are plenty of other things that we can't check before marriage.
But despite of knowing all these, she still hopes for a luck, and enter into this gamble, hoping the positive 90% match in their horoscope can make it all easy.

Many marriages happen like this, and I can vouch about my co-sis's marriage here.
She knew all about my PILs, as she is a distant relative of them. She knew well in advance about my BIL and all. But she entered into this marriage, because her horoscope matched only with my BILs. They have checked a few, and they knew hers is a difficult one, which won't be matching with everyone.
So, they didn't wanna lose the one that matched, even though there were incompatibilities and red flags. They overlooked these negative parts, and hoped the 80% matching would do some magic after marriage. But what happened in reality is a different case.
I wonder what happened to that 80% matching too, because they are battling fertility issue since marriage.
So, in addition to all the compatibility problems, this fertility problem adds further stress to their marriage.
If it is all fate, then why blindly enter into a known hell in the name of horoscope?

SGBV, Jan 29, 2018

SGBV, Jan 29, 2018

#11
Jan 29, 2018 #12

priyanka12345 Silver IL'ite

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All this is gamble and situations change the way we react.
For e.g. I and my hubby were very much in love( dont know why) when we decided to get married.Our horoscopes did not match and infact some said not to go ahead with marriage.Still we believed in our love and then we decided to get married.
You very well know how my situation was and is. So now I believe in horoscope.

If someone comes to me I will ask them to trust horoscope. So it all depends on what we go through. But above all I think its destiny. If she has to marry the person she loves she will get vibes to ignore/trust horoscopes accordingly.

priyanka12345, Jan 29, 2018

priyanka12345, Jan 29, 2018

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Jan 29, 2018 #13

Bhaskaran Silver IL'ite

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SGBV said: ↑

I know astrology is a belief, and there is no rights and wrongs when it comes people's faith system.
But compromising a lot to the point of loosing yourself in the name of astrological belief is not good according to me.
This thread is not hurt the feelings of those who believe in astrology, but this is for my understanding as astrology takes away all the intended goods of our family since I got married. That's why I am vary of this.

Nevertheless, this thread is not about me... but about my colleague who happened to be my best buddy in my new work place here.
She is in her late 20s, a professionally qualified Engineer with an attractive job/salary.
According to her, her horoscope has a Dosha, so an horoscope matching is very important for marriage.

For the past several years, her parents have been looking for prospective grooms by matching their charts primarily for her. But nothing showing up as of now, and they are very much fed up of it now.
She claims that her younger sister, who is a college passed out is awaiting for her marriage, but because of her (elder sister), everything gets delayed.
It seems, there is a guy (an Engineer) liked her, and they are friends since the past 3 years. She too likes him, and there is this emotional affair going between them for sometimes.
But this girl is very sure that she can't take this affair any further, even though she understands the heart break. She claims her horoscope wouldn't let them live peacefully, so it is better to discontinue this now.

Besides, recently a family member had approached them with a horoscope which seemingly matched 90% when the groom's side checked.
Now that the girl's side is hopeful that this is the groom they looked for.
The girl hasn't even seen his picture. Not at all interacted with him. She only knew his work details and age.
Even there is so much miss match, as he is earning far less than her.
Despite of all that, she said YES to her parents, so that they could proceed.
And all she prays was to make this happen.
She believes if horoscope is matching, everything else will fall in place.

If that is the case, why my CO-sisters and BILs are always fighting, and battling fertility issues since the past 4-5 years amidst other issues in their marriage?
They too highly believed in astrology, and checked all the horoscopes before they settle with their partners.

In my country, the war and Tsunami killed many people living in the coastal area, making the remaining members as widows, handicapped and all. Unfortunately, the people who lived in the coastal areas sincerely believe and follow astrology, by matching horoscope in marriages. Then how come natural disasters and man made disasters could disrupt their marriages this way?
And if they are natural, then what's the difference between the ones who didn't check their horoscope before marriage?

Practically speaking, this astrology is one key factor that influence in the marriage market, where women are often made to make compromises to marry anyone, whose horoscope is matching with theirs. Because many women end up being single even after crossing their marriageable age due to this horoscope mismatch.
Many parents fear when their children chose to have love marriages

I see my colleague is entering to a wrong route. But this is just according to me. Who I am to condemn their faith system.
At the same time, I feel she should take it easy, and face life as it comes practically.

Other than staying completely out of it, is there anything that I can do about it?
Click to expand...

I hope you have not studied the basics of astrology, not even a single book . without studying the basics ( not in magazines) commenting a subject is not good , I feel. I am sure you will not follow your today,s advice when your kids marriage.

Bhaskaran, Jan 29, 2018

Bhaskaran, Jan 29, 2018

#13
Jan 29, 2018 #14

Anjana124 Senior IL'ite

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SGBV said: ↑

I accept the fact that there is nothing that I could do with her case here. After all, I am just a colleague.
But when I see girls like her with very poor decision when it comes to marriage despite of their educational background and all, I understand the practical barrier they face here. And unfortunately the barrier is non other than their horoscope charts, that comes with Dosha etc
Off late, I see plenty of girls in my circle with such doshas, and who end up marrying someone incompatible knowingly with a positive hope based on astrology.

After marriage, the horoscope story becomes horror story, and that's another story.
Click to expand...

This belief just influences the thoughts and thus the life. Truly speaking we don't need these charts to predict our health and children. All the habits, discipline, way of living, most importantly, how we see look at things determines our life. Not all arranged marriages are successful and not all love marriages are unsuccessful! What we need is a mind that 'accepts' what is happening and thus acts accordingly!

Anjana124, Jan 29, 2018

Anjana124, Jan 29, 2018

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Jan 29, 2018 #15

amunique Gold IL'ite

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my case, its true.

only because of horoscope mismatch, i am facing lots of issues, so people who are into it can ONLY relate well.

amunique, Jan 29, 2018

amunique, Jan 29, 2018

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Jan 29, 2018 #16

SGBV IL Hall of Fame

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priyanka12345 said: ↑

All this is gamble and situations change the way we react.
For e.g. I and my hubby were very much in love( dont know why) when we decided to get married.Our horoscopes did not match and infact some said not to go ahead with marriage.Still we believed in our love and then we decided to get married.
You very well know how my situation was and is. So now I believe in horoscope.

If someone comes to me I will ask them to trust horoscope. So it all depends on what we go through. But above all I think its destiny. If she has to marry the person she loves she will get vibes to ignore/trust horoscopes accordingly.
Click to expand...

Well, mine was a love marriage; hence horoscope was out of question.
We do face a lot of problems in life, but I don't blame the charts for it.
Because everyone in my H's family face the problem that I face in my marriage. (including my MIL, co-sisters etc). It is because of the way men behave in their family irresponsibly.
Just like, everyone in my H's family are happy with the way how our spouses are in certain ways (very disciplined, no alcohol & drug usage, no EMA etc). This is again because of the way of their upbringing.
So, altogether it is about who they are, and how they chose to live.
In my case, we got married without checking the horoscope. My my MIL's and co-sis' case, they checked the horoscopes multiple times. But our problems are the same.

Just that, I am positive and still in love with my H despite of all the differences, because I have a slightest idea of what to expect in my marriage beforehand. And we did love each other, so we tend to forgive each other's faults easily.
My MIL and co-sis still keep the grudge and face loads of troubles in their marriage, because they were not prepared to cope with these problems. And they don't wanna take it simple or forgive their spouses.

The problem is same. Horoscope didn't change anything.
But love did little magic here

SGBV, Jan 29, 2018

SGBV, Jan 29, 2018

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Jan 29, 2018 #17

Anjana124 Senior IL'ite

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amunique said: ↑

my case, its true.

only because of horoscope mismatch, i am facing lots of issues, so people who are into it can ONLY relate well.
Click to expand...

My mom's marriage was an arranged one. My dad died after 7 years of marriage. Why was this not predicted? There were no problems in both the charts! She suffered her whole life facing quite a lot of challenges. I am not saying whatever is said in astrology is wrong. I feel this need not taken as a yardstick.

If the girl and the boy know each other well and if the families are comfortable, I guess they don't need to worry about anything. All that is needed throughout our lives are the moral support, and the high confidence levels to resolve anything that may come up.

In most of the marriages, it's funny to note that when things go well, nothing will be noted. But if there are problems we all end up blaming each other and that is enough to create a gap!

Anjana124, Jan 29, 2018

Anjana124, Jan 29, 2018

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Jan 29, 2018 #18

Anjana124 Senior IL'ite

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SGBV said: ↑

Well, mine was a love marriage; hence horoscope was out of question.
We do face a lot of problems in life, but I don't blame the charts for it.
Because everyone in my H's family face the problem that I face in my marriage. (including my MIL, co-sisters etc). It is because of the way men behave in their family irresponsibly.
Just like, everyone in my H's family are happy with the way how our spouses are in certain ways (very disciplined, no alcohol & drug usage, no EMA etc). This is again because of the way of their upbringing.
So, altogether it is about who they are, and how they chose to live.
In my case, we got married without checking the horoscope. My my MIL's and co-sis' case, they checked the horoscopes multiple times. But our problems are the same.

Just that, I am positive and still in love with my H despite of all the differences, because I have a slightest idea of what to expect in my marriage beforehand. And we did love each other, so we tend to forgive each other's faults easily.
My MIL and co-sis still keep the grudge and face loads of troubles in their marriage, because they were not prepared to cope with these problems. And they don't wanna take it simple or forgive their spouses.

The problem is same. Horoscope didn't change anything.
But love did little magic here
Click to expand...

Appreciate your approach!

Anjana124, Jan 29, 2018

Anjana124, Jan 29, 2018

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Jan 29, 2018 #19

yellowmango IL Hall of Fame

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She is educated,financially independent and mature in age. She has all the tools to use logic and fight the belief if she wants.
She herself believes in it ,then there is not much you can do.

If she marries without matching,she will forever keep looking for problems,keep her fingers crossed.
If she lets this one go because she listened to you,she will forever believe that she let a better astrological match go because of you.

She is not a child who is being mislead. She is a woman with the wealth of knowledge at her finger tips.

You can cite your family example to her. That's all.

yellowmango, Jan 29, 2018

yellowmango, Jan 29, 2018

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Jan 29, 2018 #20

MonikaSG Platinum IL'ite

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Horoscope is not a fixed document. It changes with time by the position of stars and our karmas. That's why we do not get all the answers all the time. If she know the problems at present then she is not taking that seriously. She just want to get rid of problem in hand and has an attitude of we will see. Its sometimes fruitful but can be dangerous too. As you said you are adjusting to it as being aware of it then she can also do the same or the things may vary.

MonikaSG, Jan 29, 2018

MonikaSG, Jan 29, 2018

#20

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