MIL is slapping me.helpless and clueless

Is she visiting you , book. Ticket and ask her to go , if not tell you will call police.

You are working , take leave , search for a day care and put your daughter in it .

if she stays with you , you need to move out of the house . Go to your moms place for sometime but be girl that you cannot stay with someone who hits you . There may be huge fight but you should fight it .

 

Dear Apoorva,
I am NOT going to sympathize on you. You are not a kid. You stay with your abusive in-law and non-supportive husband just for the SAKE of your kid? And you think your 3 year old kid, WILL NOT HAVE ANY BLOODY IMPACT when your IL hits you? Sorry dear, GROW UP!!!

Next time, your IL hits you, HIT HER BACK :bonk or call the police. If possible place your mobile camera on and hide it somewhere without her notice, (that time you don't hot her ) take a backup of all these videos. First consult a good lawyer and explain the situation.

LAST OPTION:
If you file a divorce case, you will get ailmony. Since you have girl daughter court will make her stay with you, I guess.

You are earning and financially independent, don't you think you can take care of your kid with your salary? Don't bother about going to mom's place, as long as you are in this PRISON, you will not know your strengths, yes it is difficult for us to face the society ALONE, but it is NOT IMPOSSIBLE. If kid is the only reason, you stay in the abusive relationship, she will NOT have a bright future, witnessing all this non-sense. This will have a huge impact psychologically.

Sorry if I was rude.

 

What did ur H say when u told him what happened ?

if i were u I just leave the house, ( assuming it is thier place), go to mom place, search for a rented small house or hostel near the office, and join kid to pre school or day care near ur new home.
I know how expensive to rent , in the matters of advance ( 10 months rent) , borrow from somebody , or use ur jewels.

If if needed and ur kid is fine leave kid with ur mom for few weeks and u live In Hostel. Go on weekends and stay there with ur kid. Save ur salary, In Few months u will be fine.
if ur H wants u he will come to u. Just because of H, and daughters father sake, u don't need to loose ur self respect.

Instead ad of crying , u should have gone with same speed and raised ur hand too. U hit or not , just threaten her.

 

SLAP HER BACK ... Why the tolerance ?? . Speak up with your parents and go to them for a while... If your husband is good enough will come back.

Atleast Have Peace of mind in life ..

 

You said it is second time she is hitting. And she says all nonsense things. You have both physical and verbal abuse at ur home.

First time when she had hit u, U didn't do anything to stop it or didn't tell her u won't accept this, so she dared to hit u second time, now if u don't do anything she will hit u third time and again and again.

And ur H doesn't give money for household expenses, so basically you are feeding her, giving food etc. In the back you get this.

Please stand for yourself, you have a child, you don't want her to think it is normal and tomorrow she also will not fight for injustice happening to her, as she doesn't have a role model in standing for self.

 

OP,

It's a pity that you feel helpless despite of you working and educated. May be your MIL and your husband also know this weakness of yours and that's why your MIL can abuse you and have audacity to feel proud about it. If your husband is just going to believe his abusive mom all the time then what kind of father he is going to be to your daughter? This kind of husbands needs hard hitting actions from their wives to feel the need to take some steps else they just ignore since their world is not breaking down as long as he knows his wife is just going to forget it until it happens next time. They keep buying time like this and make you believe that all is well.
Tell him to take his mother with him and take care of her. It’s not your responsibility to take care of his mother when his mother has come down to even hitting his wife for a small argument.
What do you mean when you say you are not allowed to spend money or you are dependent even though you are working?
Gather yourself and take some steps now, rather than waiting for more one more slap. If this house is theirs, pack your bags and move out with your daughter. If your mother can take you in (assuming she lives alone), go there and live with her. If no one can support you, you are adult enough to take care of yourself, rent a place near your mother’s home and live with your daughter. Arrange a day-care or preschool for your daughter. Hire maids-nanny to help you out. Revive your self-respect and learn to live by yourself. Refuse to accept the same living arrangement until any substantial action is taken by your husband. Don’t think that you are helpless just because your father is no more, you are a working woman and you can do a lot better only if you believe in yourself.
Section 498(a) is made for people like you who need real help but the real victims are so weak that they don’t even think about this. Tell your husband and mother in law that you are going to consult a lawyer as you do not want to live in an abusive environment where your daughter has to fall asleep seeing torture on her mother.

 

Your MIL crossed her all limits.....Why didn't you stop her when she was hitting you? instead of crying you should have warned her.....

Send her to your DH's place & you can ask your mom to stay with you....it's good for everyone....

 

Come on...Your MIL has hit you before the child, and it is the second time.
She is controlling, abusing physically and verbally. Your child is witnessing this.
She cries because it is the most difficult thing for a child to see her helpless mom is victimized. She can't do anything, but showing her anger by crying.

This enviroment is not good for your child. So, if you are staying in this marriage despite of all the happenings because of your child, then it is time to change your mind.
The very reason -that is for the child, you should get out of this marriage.

You have a job in hand. However small it may be, your job should be able to give you some protection.
Ask your parents to provide some physical help, like baby sitting, etc... so you won't lose much of your salary for the maids and care takers.
File a maintanence case against your H, and expect some money for both of you.

He should be able to see the things correctly, but if he fails, divorce him with an alimony. Settle with the life with respect.

 

take your kid and move out.Go to live with your mother.Dont take crap.You need to be strong and independent for your kid.

 

they are weak thats why they become victim....when they become vicitm they become more weak....