Auntie, surprisingly, offered no contest to my above postulate. She just chanted a lilting verse in elegant sanskrit with a complacent buddha- look and went to bed. Google later translated the verse for me as something to do with muddy slush and sandalwood paste and olfactorily challenged swine. Not very elegant . I went to bed in a very unbuddhalike mood.
On the final day of her visit, I felt a trifle sympathetic towards Auntie. The poor dear had had only good intentions . Perhaps I could give her a hint that all her sincere evangelism had not gone to waste. That I too, had converted to the life of A Serious Seeker ” I have been Introspecting Auntie. If in the Begining, there was only the pure undivided Brahman, why did The One become the Many, out of its own Free Will , for whose entertainment ? If Life’s purpose is only to merge with the One, and if we somehow obtained sayujya and became IT, what guarantee is there that The One will not again go play Leela and become Many ? Isnt it all so pointless ?”
Auntie gave me her favourite look – Serious. “You know, Manjula, after we have run around in circles, it may just transpire that Existence does not need to have any Reason or Meaning. What IS, just IS . What ISN’T, just ISN’T. “
Suddenly realising that she may have given away more than she wanted to, she added hastily,in a rapid fire recitation of rote- learnt profundities ” Such confusions will arise as you progress along the path of Sadhana. You may also gain siddhis. Yet, you must remain achalaand be Ekagrachitta . You will succeed in finding The Truth. “
I felt i had peeked through a chink in her armour.
She was just an aged version of me, closet- agnostic , insatiably curious about the phenomenon of Life, using philosophy and spirituality like Sudoku to keep alzheimer’s at bay . The only difference is that she has a serious face while I am never taken seriously by anybody . Its unfortunate , she had made herself believe that only unhappy seriousness could lead her to the ultimate Ananda.
Auntie Serious can keep her serious philosophies about Satya, Mithya , Anithya etc . and agonize endlessly. I am just happy and grateful to have had the chance to experience this multifarious life , no matter if I am the product of Karmic Creation, or Intelligent Design or Biological Accident . A brief bubble , a rope-like snake , or a mudpot full of Akasha.
Life, even with its full quota of illusions ,delusions and pollutions, is Beautiful. If this is a Dream and there is a waking-up, let it happen organically, naturally , in this janma, the next or the further next , without my tying myself into serious Introspecting knots. Whats the hurry ? When the Cucumber Ripens, The Stalk Will Fall Off , urvarukam Iva Bandhanaat etc……….
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