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zero libido?

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by loonypooh, Jun 20, 2010.

  1. loonypooh

    loonypooh Silver IL'ite

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    ladies, i have never participated in this part of the forum,but of late i am pondering whats going on with me?

    me and DH are happily married for good 3.5 yrs and have a happy family life.i have a 8.5 month daughter.but ever since her birth,i have completely lost interest in sex.is this normal?

    i breastfeed her, n ofcourse almost the entire day goes in looking after her.

    not that DH has ever questioned me, he is a sane man u know, but i feel guilty at times.

    we do hug, kiss, but have never really got into action for the past 8 months.now could this be hormonal? or is it that since i am lactating and this would happen?

    now that i would be resuming work in less than a month,i am pondering even more.

    excuse me if i dont make sense :(
     
    Last edited: Jun 20, 2010
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  2. GiJoe

    GiJoe Silver IL'ite

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    loonypooh what is stopping you? Are you thinking that your DH will make the first move, he might be thinking that you are still in the recovering phase. You have to have a talk with your DH and find some time just you and your DH.
     
  3. loonypooh

    loonypooh Silver IL'ite

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    maybe u got me wrong joe, i just dont feel like! or else why wld i hold back?
     
  4. GiJoe

    GiJoe Silver IL'ite

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    Ok i get your point now, from your post you had mentioned that your whole day is consumed by looking after your little one, so why not take some help from your family and leave the little one with the family and start spending some time with your DH and then see how things go from there.
     
  5. Nitha J

    Nitha J IL Hall of Fame

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    Poonam;
    Perfectly normal. Some woman feel decreased libido and some feel an increase in the feelings. It is hormones plus fatigue plus the thoughts of LO that does the trick. You can read it more here . Is it normal not to want sex after having a baby? | BabyCenter
    To come out of that mode we really have to take positive steps towards it and mental resolve for it. Pelvic exercises do help a lot. Afterwards everything will fall in track :)
    -Nitha
     
  6. Mahajanpragati

    Mahajanpragati Platinum IL'ite

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    hi poonam,
    it happens after baby & specially as u r breastfeeding.
    spending time together away from baby helps.........maybe when the baby is sleeping both of u can spend time doing the things which interested both of u before baby.
    the most important thing is having'me only time'.no baby,no dh..........only for urself.
    it can be in form of walk in morning when dh is babysitting or going to library to exchange books or going for threading etc............pampering urself really helps.try
    pragati
     
  7. tashidelek2002

    tashidelek2002 IL Hall of Fame

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    It's not uncommon for this to happen. You might have a blood test to check your hormones. It will probably correct itself normally but if it doesn't for sure have your hormones checked.
    '
     
  8. ShilpaMa

    ShilpaMa IL Hall of Fame

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    I guess its got to do with harmonal levels, sleep deficiet & the amount of rest you're getting.
     
  9. grihasta

    grihasta New IL'ite

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    I believe once you get past the breast-feeding stage, your harmones should be back to normal and things should be good. there have been reports of women having decreased libido while breast-feeding and after giving birth
     
  10. rosegirl

    rosegirl Bronze IL'ite

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    I have realized one thing, when DH says something nice about me (He usually criticizes a lot), that day seems so colorful and romantic.So ask DH what he likes about u and u will automatically get romantic and have a memorable time.
     

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