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zero communication-how to start talking with DH

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by 1dropLove, Jul 23, 2010.

  1. lavani

    lavani Platinum IL'ite

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    dear,

    first please do not be offended. you had a child too soon. i did not read all your previous posts, so you might have a valid reason too. but here is the thing, a child does not increase love in the family initially. it is lot more stress . and when you and you partner do not understand each other, it adds up more.

    couple of things, first you have to take care of yourself. More mentally than physically. join yoga , meditation. learn to handle your emotions .

    you can never break the blood bond. do not try too. criticizing or pointing faults, will do harm than good. but you have to create the bond of love for you . appreciate, do things for him, in public too , romantic . watch people closely, do not react, you can learn a lot and use.

    at the same time, fake appreciation of his family. but that does not mean you get insulted like a door mat.

    while doing all this, it will take a heavy emotional toll on you, that is where yoga and meditation and any activity outside the house comes where you can meet new women and make new friends for emotinal support.

    this is right age in marriage for counselling. believe me after 5 - 10 years, people get fixed, counselling is waste. but early 1-3 years are the best.

    these sounds cunning, but it does not matter, it is your family. you have to do anything that makes it whole and happy.


    also another thing, this is my opinion. till he moves out with you and lives alone. things are really tough to change. I am big believer of joint family but only after men realize who is family and who is extended family. It takes some years till kids grow up. my H now is focused only on kids. he loves having his mom or my mom over, because it makes kids happy and he does not have to worry about take off time too from work. so again it comes circle back to kids. but that maturity and bond comes when men live alone with their children and wife.
     
    Last edited: Sep 9, 2018
  2. Ishaan10

    Ishaan10 Bronze IL'ite

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    Sorry ,but it's not to criticize u both but u can give solutions for her but not after 8 years...
     

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