Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by Sriniketan, Nov 13, 2007.
Yes, Sharada--that's why we are 'Asian Parents', isn't it?
Wonderful article.And thought provoking.Here is what I think.
I agree we are strict with our children in regards to junk foods, stay overs, no late nights etc.
Children don’t realize they are like small plants, and we are the fence around them, to protect them from dangers, till they are grown up to take care of themselves, which is around marriage time, when they are on their own.
Our kids will realize when they have their own children later in life, that what parents went thru for them.
Thanks for your response, Kamalji.
i totally agree with you that they will realise only when they have children.
referring children to small plants and the fence for our restrictions is a very apt example, i like it.
Sorry for the delay in the reply. Good to know another 'Youuuu Asian Parent'...!
When we welcome all of them, the mischief makers usually abstain themselves. All the other kids know that as long as they are good, they can have fun. When our kids know we are there to keep an eye on them, they have a sense of security :exactly:. And curfews, we "Asian parents" are famous for that!! Aren't we?
When I was a kid, I used to have Post Cards of AB. Any new card, I'll be the first one to have it. My son has tennis players, nike, reebok posters in his room.
We parents are parents... Its just the geography which is different.
I came to India after 9 years.. I could not recognise my own home street. India has changed so much. Shopping malls, fly overs, pubs, junk food joints, all nine yards!
Kids and their attitude is also changing. This is a trying time for the both parents and kids!
Happy to meet yet another Asian parent!
I agree on you Sriniketan that is what they argue on as if they know everything in the world. But we have to be strong if said no it has to be no till the end.
I think this where our strength as a parent lies, 'no means no'.
:iagree absolutely with Sriniketan and you. A 'No' is a 'No'. I also add another phrase - 'please dont make me say it again!'. My son knows that is the end of the matter. I will reason out and also give alternatives.
I like the way you put. We have a saying in Telugu;
Mokkai vonganidi maanai vongunaa?
which means - if a little plant cannot bend, can a tree bend? Children like to take the easy/fun way out of any issue. They may start growing in a crooked way. We as parents should support them and straighten them out. They will grow up straight wih all the good values of life. We may not be able to help them later on in life if they groe up to be adults with wrong attitudes and values.
We cannot make a fully grown crooked tree straight, can we?
I'm So Sure!
I am happy to know that you are SO SURE... i agree with your
Mokkai vonganidi maanai vongunaa?..chala nijamandi.... the same in tamil is 5 la valayathathu, 50 thil valayathu...
My kids know i mean no when i say it....the second time I say with a Stress as "Capital N O." it means a definite no...and when i call them by their full name along with their surname, it means i have reached by saturation point..on the matter...small cues...that goes a long way for me....(Daughter understands, it is tough with my son..who needs explanations for everything.shakehead)
Hi Shanthi and all the ladies do you have problem in saying 'no' most of the time??
In my case when I say NO the issue goes to dad the boss, and these dad's are at home hardly in the evening without knowing anything starts pampering the kids, let him go and do what he wants he is grown up, but I feel teen is the age where parents have to be more careful and handle the circumstances more tactfully.
Before when a NO is put to him he use to listen now he is very smart,
He doesn't do any stupid things, but still from our side I think we should be careful.
And Sharada I think you are right we have to reason out and give an alternative