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Yet Another Colour Thread

Discussion in 'Infants' started by giggles, Mar 9, 2011.

  1. giggles

    giggles New IL'ite

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    Hello Ladies (and Gents):

    This is my first post here. Very nice to have a place that's culturally relevant to me(hard to talk about some things in a generic forum)!

    Anyway, here's my question. Please be forewarned that this does involve yet another question about skin colour.

    I have a beautiful baby girl (she's about seven weeks now). Like most of her South Asian counterparts, she was born very fair (think white baby). The funny thing is that I never noticed the colour of her skin. Actually, that's a lie. I did notice. When they put her on my chest (immediately after birth), I noticed she was a dark purple. I now know that this is normal--that newborns come out purplish and they change colour within minutes. Anyway, I was shocked as I thought she came out black (what with the delirium that ensues when one is giving birth and all)... Anyway, after that initial shock, I sort of dissociated myself from all of it and never really noticed her colour that day.

    However, the days that followed were a different story. I remember watching helplessly as her colour changed. She went from VERY fair to what many would consider dark-wheatish. I'm medium wheatish and her father is dark wheatish (neither of us is "dark"). Her hands, for example, were very fair.

    My question doesn't involve a desperate attempt to change her colour via concoctions meant to be slathered on her fragile skin in an effort to "whiten" her. What I do want to know is whether you or someone you know has had a child who regained some of their "original" colour. Perhaps a child was darker during infancy and then settled into a more medium wheatish colour? I'm wondering if perhaps this is the case with my little pooh bear.

    I hate myself for constantly worrying about her skin colour. I would be a liar if I said it didn't bother me. I know the annoying BS that ensues when one is subtly reminded that they are "dark" or wheatish...I have a niece like this and she doesn't thnk she is beautiful.

    I hope to get as many responses as I can. I'd like to know what you've seen. Perhaps I'm wasting time worrying about something that, really, in the grand scheme things, matters very little. Still, she's my baby and I want her to have it all. And yes, I admit, I think being fair is a physical ideal for me (as far as physical attributes go). Mind you, I don't find pale whiteness beautiful or "best". I think that the "golden tan" complexion is the most attractive. That's what I want for her. I do not want her to be compared to others who are lighter and feel inferior. I see this all too often. Again, I refer to the example of my niece (who is much darker to her lighter female cousins). Most of this is due to the BS that surrounds her (female relatives who comment on her colour). My husband detests that I even think about this stuff. He sees a flawless creature in our baby girl.

    And I do accept that I clearly have my own issues with this...issues that may be transferred to my child (inadvertently, of course). I do not wish to burden my child with my own ideals of beauty. My vanity shouldn't poison her childhood. It's something I'm slowly working on.

    In the interm, please do respond to my query.

    Thanks for reading!
     
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  2. Spiderman1

    Spiderman1 Gold IL'ite

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    No, I havent known anyone regain "original" newborn color

    Yes, you are.


    And I am not surprised that your hubby does detest, abhor, abominate, loathe that you are giving thought about skin color. He is right about that.
     
    Last edited: Mar 9, 2011
  3. giggles

    giggles New IL'ite

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    Thanks for the response, Spiderman. So you've never seen someone get lighter (not necessarily return to their newborn colour - I doubt this happens to many people). I want to know if there's a chance she may get lighter than she is now.
     
  4. Spiderman1

    Spiderman1 Gold IL'ite

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    That, hmmm...she might or might not.
    I dont think it happens based on stuff that you goo up and lather on her skin though, but for various reasons pigmentation does change sometimes over time. It can lighten a bit or darken a bit - but thats a natural process, so dont sweat on it.
     
  5. giggles

    giggles New IL'ite

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    That's what bothers me. I am not a "wait and see" type of person. I suppose, for the sake of my baby, I'll have to just suck it up and deal with it. Still, I'm hoping others here will chime in with their observations. Empirical responses. It'll give me something to chew on while I stew all of this over. :)
     
  6. billybob

    billybob Gold IL'ite

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    You have a healthy happy baby be happy, If you don't feel bad about your spouse being wheatish dark, I cannot understand why you are worried about your baby. Your attitude may effect her self esteem in future.
     
    Last edited: Mar 10, 2011
  7. Preet82

    Preet82 Silver IL'ite

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    My dear,she is your daughter,she is a baby..please let her be the way she is.She is a healthy smart baby.NO ONE CAN MAKE HER FEEL INFERIOR IF YOU INSTILL CONFIDENCE AND THE RIGHT ATTITUDE IN HER.As a mother,if you are fretting about her complexion,even she will also grow up thinking that it is a bad thing that she is dusky.please quit worrying and just enjoy your baby. She will be if what complexion her genes decide to be.
     
  8. Spiderman1

    Spiderman1 Gold IL'ite

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    I was going to ask about this, but maybe she is going with the walt disney stereotype of "Tall, dark, handsome guy" and "Fair and lovely princess" :)

    Earth to fairytale...calling... kapish? :)
     
    Last edited: Mar 10, 2011
  9. Rakhii

    Rakhii Moderator IL Hall of Fame

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    Who knows by the time she grows up, fair-skin might be out of style.
     
  10. Spiderman1

    Spiderman1 Gold IL'ite

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    Walt disney edited versions have to be printed
     

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