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Working just to avoid being home with in-laws

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by Rihana, Nov 4, 2012.

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  1. Nov 4, 2012 #11
    Stressfull

    Stressfull Silver IL'ite

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    well rihana

    whats ur opinion on these :) according to my opinion its depends on the understanding of both the parties well i think inlaws wont express it but inner they will have a wish that dil must take up a job so my son no need to spend money on her any ways they know that everything will be there for them on right time whther dil is working or not so it desnt matter them(poor son doesn't know this) feels very guilt if wife takes a job my parents may feel we r not caring for them

    poor wife knows both of the intentions so its better for her to decide which makes her feel comfortable at least for sometime so it result for any job take up:hide:
     
    Stressfull, Nov 4, 2012
    Stressfull, Nov 4, 2012
    #11
  2. Nov 4, 2012 #12
    parineetha

    parineetha IL Hall of Fame

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    Putting myself on her shoes, I would take up that job, else I would be in the verge of committing the sin by sending my poor PIL's to work :rotfl..
    Rather they becoming intolerant and leaving the house, am giving them peacful "their time"...

    -Neetu-
     
    parineetha, Nov 4, 2012
    parineetha, Nov 4, 2012
    #12
    3 people like this.
  3. Nov 4, 2012 #13
    varadhan8

    varadhan8 Bronze IL'ite

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    In my opinion there is no wrong in taking part time job when inlaws are around to avoid unwant conflicts between them. After marriage i stayed in home for just 5 months to get my certificate after which i started working. even though they wil feel bored n all sagas wil b there any ways inlaws wil nt talk much with dils so no issues.
     
    varadhan8, Nov 4, 2012
    varadhan8, Nov 4, 2012
    #13
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  4. Nov 4, 2012 #14
    DGcreative

    DGcreative Platinum IL'ite

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    I would take up that or any such job to stay away from home.. Nothing wrong in her thoughts.
     
    DGcreative, Nov 4, 2012
    DGcreative, Nov 4, 2012
    #14
  5. Nov 4, 2012 #15
    justanothergirl

    justanothergirl IL Hall of Fame

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    Rihana...my sincere advice. Go out and earn that $12 hr per hour. Its worth it. PIL no PIL.
     
    justanothergirl, Nov 4, 2012
    justanothergirl, Nov 4, 2012
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  6. Nov 4, 2012 #16
    Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    My basic take on this is that of sushmavja's. It depends on how the in-laws usually treat her.

    Monita, by 'is it right?' I didn't mean is it legal for her to work. The question is more like, 'is it fair; given that the money is so less, and husband says no...'

    JAG, we have to keep in mind that question is not about a woman working or not. It is about a woman who would not work otherwise, going to work solely to avoid whole day with in-laws.

    -----------------------------
    I hesitate to type my honest response in this forum : ), but I think if the in-laws and she get along OK, then, what she is doing is borderline passive aggressive. Some questions come to mind:
    1. Would she do the same if her parents were moving in with them?
    2. Would she like it if roles were reversed - she is out earning money for the family. Husband steps out of house for a peanuts paying job with sole purpose of avoiding her parents?
     
    Rihana, Nov 4, 2012
    Rihana, Nov 4, 2012
    #16
  7. Nov 4, 2012 #17
    Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Would anybody's response change if only MIL or only FIL was moving in with the couple?

    All young people leave the house in the morning and the MIL or FIL is stuck alone at home. Unable to drive. 6 hours of loneliness. Mon-Fri. At lets say, 60+ yrs of age.

    ----
    Just to clarify - situation is theoretical. And would never apply to me.
     
    Rihana, Nov 4, 2012
    Rihana, Nov 4, 2012
    #17
  8. Nov 4, 2012 #18
    whatisaguytodo

    whatisaguytodo Gold IL'ite

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    I think it's fine. It's also good for when you get older. Keeping busy helps keep dementia at bay.
     
    whatisaguytodo, Nov 4, 2012
    whatisaguytodo, Nov 4, 2012
    #18
  9. Nov 4, 2012 #19
    emerald44

    emerald44 Bronze IL'ite

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    Do talwaar ek mayaan main nahi rahe sakthe (two swords cannot stay in one hold) so personally I would
    rush out to maybe Pluto to check for life there
     
    Last edited: Nov 4, 2012
    emerald44, Nov 4, 2012
    emerald44, Nov 4, 2012
    #19
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  10. Nov 4, 2012 #20
    whatisaguytodo

    whatisaguytodo Gold IL'ite

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    They can come on indusladies and post. :rotfl My solutions to this would be introduce them to other older folk in the area. They can hang out together. Failing that, they can volunteer or do some gardening. The mothers will cook so that will take half the day. Not sure what they father's would do.
     
    whatisaguytodo, Nov 4, 2012
    whatisaguytodo, Nov 4, 2012
    #20
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