words are sharper then sword......(Adults only)

Discussion in 'Jokes' started by balamotwani, Oct 17, 2007.

  1. balamotwani

    balamotwani Bronze IL'ite

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    DON'T LOOK AT NAKED LADY
    Boy 1: Why do you run from a naked lady?
    Boy 2: Becos my mum said that if I look at a naked lady, I'll turn into stone. A part of me is getting hard already!


    NAMES OF WIVES

    A malay man had 4 wives, and he called his...
    4th wife..... baby doll
    3rd wife.....china doll
    2nd wife.....barbie doll
    1st wife..... panadol !

    HOW INDIA GOT ITS NAME
    This is how India got its name.....
    The king was having sex with his mistress while thinking a name of his country and his mistress ask him "is it In Dear?"...

    RESEARCH FINDING

    Research shows men are fatter than women because every-night men get fresh milk & 2 papayas women only get 1 banana, 2 peanuts & 1 tea-spoon of starch!


    ARAB MAN
    An arab was being interviewed at a US
    checkpoint.
    'Your name pls.'?
    "Abdul Aziz "
    "Sex? "
    "Six times a week!! "
    "No, no, I mean male or female! "
    "Doesn't matters, sometimes even camel !"

    SERVICE

    Sex is like a restaurant.
    Sometimes you get full satisfactory service, and sometimes you have to be satisfied with self-service"


    HAPPY MAN

    What makes a happy man?
    Daughter on the cover of cosmo.
    Son on the cover of sports illustrated.

    Mistress on the cover of playboy
    and .. Wife on the cover of "missing
    persons"


    SWIMSUIT
    Why was the 2-piece swimsuit invented?
    To separate the HAIRY section from the DAIRY section.


    GOOD AMBITION
    Teacher: What do you want to become?
    Little Johnny: Doctor !!
    Teacher: Why?
    Little Johnny: Coz its the only profession where u can tell a woman to take off her clothes and ask her husband to pay for it.

    DENTIST
    Woman complaining to dentist: "It's so painful, I'll rather have a baby than have a tooth removed."
    Dentist: "Make up your mind soon, I'll adjust the chair accordingly."

    VIRGIN
    Old lady, 85, a virgin, about to die. wanted her tombstone to read :
    BORN A VIRGIN, LIVED A VIRGIN, DIED A VIRGIN.
    The engraver shortened it to: " RETURNED UNOPENED "

    OLD MAN AND YOUNG GIRL
    75 yr old man got married to a 15 yr girl.
    On their first night both were crying - why???
    Coz she didn't know anything, and he had forgotten everything.
     
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  2. vidyasundar

    vidyasundar Bronze IL'ite

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    :rotfl:rotfl:rotfl

    arab man joke was good

    :wave
     
  3. priyauc

    priyauc Bronze IL'ite

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    last two are good ones.
     
  4. vivbass

    vivbass Gold IL'ite

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    chi,very naughty:tongue:thumbsup
     
  5. Arunarc

    Arunarc Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    :rotfl:rotfl:rotflnaughty good ones liked the arab and the last one cool:thumbsup
     

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