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Women Want Divorce After Kids Go College

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by ProudIndian, Aug 4, 2020.

  1. ProudIndian

    ProudIndian Gold IL'ite

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    Sometime back there was thread about this. Lot of women think/want this so kids can have family environment plus better finances etc. I want to know if anyone gone through this in their late 40s or after 50. It needs lot of energy to start new life alone.
     
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  2. MalStrom

    MalStrom IL Hall of Fame

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    It’s more common than one would think. Look up “grey divorce”. Often by that time both parties are well-established in their careers, financially secure, find that they have little in common once the kids have flown the nest and decide to separate. If they are in their late forties-mid fifties there’s still a long stretch ahead of them and some choose to make a fresh start.
    As long as you have kids together though there will still be ties that bind. And there will still be fallout for the children even though they are grown up.
     
    MaruthiRao likes this.
  3. ProudIndian

    ProudIndian Gold IL'ite

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    I understand there is no reason to compromise adjust once kids gone. But what about health issues with growing age? Everyone wants companionship, some emotional support. With previous bad marriage experience women will be more reluctant to get into new relationships.
     
  4. MalStrom

    MalStrom IL Hall of Fame

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    Many people do enter new relationships after divorce or form new support systems.
     
  5. DDream

    DDream Platinum IL'ite

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    I know a case of divorce after 25yr of marriage. She got married to an American in her 50s. Her kids are living with them. Looks like everyone is happy.
     
  6. Sweety2019

    Sweety2019 Silver IL'ite

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    I guess they are brave to take that step. You can't live the same day twice. And companionship need not be a spouse I guess, because if they have stayed in a toxic relationship for 18-20years and not able to find peace, they are better off seperated.
    If they are financially well, then there would be so many retirement homes for the later Stage of life.
     
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  7. MaruthiRao

    MaruthiRao Silver IL'ite

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    Yes, with the kids grown up, acceptance of a new family member, does matter. Even though one understands, cannot expect that the kids align with the new member... For many couples, relationships end up in constraints, coz of one losing interest in another, reasons may be many.... But they should take a step based on how the kids take it forward... Many woman as I have seen, move ahead in mid forties, coz of insecurity issues, thinking it would stabilize life for the rest of the years being happy.
     
  8. lavani

    lavani Gold IL'ite

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    men do it to . my manager did. he knew he has to split 50%, but still went on. he said, he has done his job of being provider to children, now wants to live and full fill his bucket list.
     
  9. shama146

    shama146 Gold IL'ite

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    Nice thread

    If you are in a not so happy marriage, it does makes a lot of sense to split once kids are grown up. I guess 80% of women stay in unhappy marriages only coz of kids. They already have wasted 20-25 years of their life. Now there is no glue left for them to stick together. Many want a change of life, be it stressful. Who knows they may find happiness.
     
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  10. ProudIndian

    ProudIndian Gold IL'ite

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    When I see threads from young moms with bad husbands I feel women get trapped because of kids. I know some moms with special needs kids whose husbands don’t care plus have stress from in laws. Is it punishment for giving birth to kids? Should new generation girls prevent pregnancies?
     

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