Why married life becomes loveless after some years?

hi tulipsandrose,

I am Garima. Its been 8 mnths for my marriage. You know the question you asked it percolates in most of the married couple minds. What i believe or i think is love never dies. Its still there you just need to take a step forward. Like just make a call or drop a msg to your husband saying you love him, and you feel lucky to have him. If he is not telling you do not feel he doesnt love you, love is there you just need to express it. You can leave love notes on Tv or in his wallet, plan a candle night dinner at home, prepare his favorite dishes, or surprise him, take time out and try go for walk at night or long drives. These are just few things i am telling you. What i mean is that if your husband isnt expressing you express it full heartedly, show him tell him how much you love him. M sure you will fall in love all over again. You know men are not as expressive as women so we need to tel them. Its only you and your husband who can bring love back to your life. You ll feel love in the air. Trust me. Let me know if it helped. And all the best. I am younger to you but i just felt like answering this question. Hope i didnt hurt you in any way. Take Care

Warm Regards,
Garima

 

Hi,

This is Just my opinion.

I am married for close to 3 years and i would say that married life doesnt become loveless over a period of time.

Couples do have same level of love and affections at times it becomes more.

But the only problem is the expression of love becomes less.

Our responsibility and priority changes in this period ( Career, Kid, Settling down financially etc.)

So we tend to run behind our targets and take our spouses for granted when the love has to be expressed.

Standing by your spouse on their hard times , Surprise gifts, outings may refresh the love . Sorry am not that good in giving ideas

Cheers
Sweetlife

 

hi onesweetlife,
i completely agree with you. well i dont have kids yet but i have seen people around and it is exactly the same thg yu said...priorities chngs, respnsblities are more but v shldnt stop makin efforts. Infact i wld like to add i hve met few ppl whu beleive that after having kids their life has ended. I mean this is very sad to know that god gave dem the most beautifl gift dat is childrn n dey take it as a reason for nt enjoyn deir life....

 

I had arrange marriage at 23 and i really didn't get time to feel and express our love, we didn't know each other and after 10 months of our marriage i was a mother of an angel at age 24. I was outside to india, nobody was there to help. I was not able to handle this pressure like whole night sitting with baby n all .but slowly slowly things was ok,
now my daughter is 3 yr old, i am 27, feeling like i m newly married. We are madly in love each other, we fights too but if i go to india to my mom place, i am not able to sleep, feels like there is something missing, that is him.
Earlier i wanted to run this life with lots of responsibilty, kid and house work.
U know what..... he wakes me up with warm cup of tea , he sings " uth jaa ri gudiya mishri ki pudiya methe lage tere nena" so sweet na, he calls me....3-4 times in a day he is fond of variety of food....I try my level my best to give him best and healthy food. Sometimes we feels bore with same thing, like cooking eating and office , then we plan outing. we both are very spritiual, we goes to temple every weekend i pray for him and he pray for me.
So now i can say inspite of all kind of different problems....we are happily married.
We should always find some likes n dislikes of our partner and work on it....he/she will start loving you again....

 

hi Chocogal26,
reading ur post i couldnt stop smilling...U lucky touch wood.. god bless yu... theres so much to learn frm yu... evn i fel ds smtyms here. a monotonous life....fels like i shld go home..but i cnnt run...wsh to hear frm u..

 

We start taking each other for granted and stop caring so much, hence the marriage seems loveless after some years.

 

Married life remains fun & loving as long as both the partners are sharing the fun and responsibility of the new roles in their lives.... and if its coming natural to both.

When both or either get into the calculative/ suffering mode ... fun and romance is gone

 

Totally agree. It cannot be one way calling, one way messaging, one way expressing of love. Both partners should understand the beauty and fun of marriage and its new challenges as the days go by. If that happens, there is romance for ever.