Why do young Indians holidaying abroad feel awkward to wear Indian dresses?

Discussion in 'General Discussions' started by Lalit, May 29, 2014.

  1. Lalit

    Lalit New IL'ite

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    I have seen female tourists from Japan,USA,Canada,etc coming to India to spend holidays.But none of them is OBSESSED about wearing only Indian sarees or salwar kameez so that they can "fit in" Indian culture and get accepted by Indians.Although they do like Indian outfits,they don't obsess about wearing only these on Indian holiday.

    But when young Indian females holiday abroad,they feel "out of fashion" and awkward about wearing sarees or salwar suits.If they wear them they feel out of place and not fitting in western life,while their friends back in India ridicule them why they did not wear any western outfits abroad .They call them behenjis.If you have ever seen your female friends' photographs of a foreign holiday,you'll hardly come across any such photograph which shows her in an indian outfit.Usually she'll be seen in jeans,capris,skirts,etc.


    Now let me quote another example of how Indians feel ashamed if they don't know how to eat with a fork and knife,or with chopsticks.But it's not their fault also_Other Indians who know v.well how to eat with these make them feel as if they are backward,as if they have no table manners,that they are old fashioned,"not cool",etc etc.

    Interestingly if an American or any other foreign tourist visits an Indian restaurant,he does not know how to eat chapati with vegetable.Still he tries..But he never feels inferiority complex over his lack of knowledge about Indian eating habits.Also no Indian ridicules him that he does not fit in Indian culture.No Indian calls him backward,stupid,etc,etc.



    Why do Indians like to look down upon their own people?

    Are we like this only?
     
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  2. vishal21

    vishal21 Silver IL'ite

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    So true ....Trust me this situation will never change...we are neither completly western nor eastern we are neither liberal nor conservative ..its sad but true faintingsmiley
     
  3. cutemonster

    cutemonster Platinum IL'ite

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    Many times the dress which a woman will wear when holidaying abroad, she might not be wearing in front of her family, like shorts, capris , short skirts, dresses etc and in many families even jeans are not allowed once you marry , so when they get a chance they wear and enjoy their holidays. personally i would not wear a sari when i go to beach , or trekking in some mountains . jeans and tees are more comfy for holidays.
    but yes about using chopsticks and forks etc , you could be right to some extent.
     
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  4. Lalit

    Lalit New IL'ite

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    Yeah you are right.But in my post I was referring to young females which also includes unmarried ones who go with their friends,parents,etc.

    At the same time I have personally seen this attitude in married females who are holidaying abroad, even when there was never any restriction to wear western outfits after marriage.

    The main point is Indian obsession to "fit in" other countries.
     
  5. nuss

    nuss Platinum IL'ite

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    Well, let's see- an outfit isn't the only thing that helps one "fit" in a new culture/ country. Main reason is- women want to try different outfits (experimenting) that they normally won't wear or feel uncomfortable with the stares from relatives/ neighbors etc. Vacation provides an excellent opportunity for this experimentation. Men do the same thing (wearing shorts is what comes to mind) but we've accepted jeans/trousers and shirts/ tees as a day-to-day attire for men (instead of kurta-pajama), but women are still considered "homely" in Indian outfits.
    Now, saree is a party dress, it is not easy for everyone to wear a saree and walk around easily but yes, salwar-kameez is a super comfortable and versatile outfit.
    I don't think people are obsessed about "fitting in", it's more like following the media (Indian celebrities don't wear Indian outfits either) and try to look like celebrities, this is purely my opinion.
    I don't know if I fit in your "young women" criteria. In my 30s, I 'm not really young and although I love sarees, I won't wear one if I'm out and about (for comfort). I do wear chudidaars quite often though.

    Why do Indians like to look down upon their own people?

    To feel superior, I think. I'd like to hear from other members because I wonder about this too. I don't know if you've read my thread- "Why do people feel need to stereotype"- you might want to take a look :)
     
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  6. han412

    han412 Gold IL'ite

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    Women when they go on a holiday not necessarily abroad tend to dress up in Western outfits. That's because they cannot or are not allowed to wear these outfits where "relatives will see them".
    One of my friends went to Kerala and she was dressed in outfits that will look good in discotheques only!!! Sad but that's what happens when too many restrictions are imposed.
     
    Last edited: May 29, 2014
  7. crazywriter

    crazywriter Platinum IL'ite

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    Fitting in may not be the reason, as cutemonster said. There could be several reasons. One good reason could be that in western countries, people dont stare, gawk, or pass lewd comments on women who wear a pair of shorts, or a tank top. Women there have a lot more freedom in this respect. And just because one is Indian, one does not walk around in saris or dhotis all the time, isnt it? How many men would carry dhotis or lungis when they go abroad?! Do you really want to call attention to the fact that you are a tourist by wearing saris and dhotis in Switzerland?!! :-D
     
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  8. darmesh

    darmesh Platinum IL'ite

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    Very much true. After marriage, an Indian wife is less inclined to wear jeans. But, the reasons may not be that, her MIL or husband does not permit jeans.

    I have seen many wives themselves are not comfortable in wearing jeans after marriage, due to their own wrong fixed ideas. Not that, their husbands deny permission for jeans.
     
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  9. sdiva20

    sdiva20 Platinum IL'ite

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    The OP is specifically pointing out to females. But my question is why men dress in western clothes while holidaying abroad? Why don't they wear lungi or dhoti? Just imagine wearing a crisp and clean lungi or dhoti and walking into that cool café in Paris ....
     
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  10. RedRuby

    RedRuby Platinum IL'ite

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    Very good questiond and valid point. So why again is it that men can wear jeans and women not?

    I too think it has to do with the restrictions and the fact that in western countries men dont stare or pass bad comments if a woman wears shorts etc. they simply dont care.

    I wear here things i wud not wear in India. Not becoz i want to fit in here or there but due to the security aspect (India). PPl wud get more interested in looking at you in some western countries if you wear traditional indian clothes then if you walk arround in jeans. So that reason is partly a "no attention please" one.

    But i dont agree really on the all females when visiting western countries "just" wear western outfits. I mix for example jeans with kurta and other traditional items with other western modern style cloths. It depends for example on my taste, mood and wether i feel comfortable in a dress or not (just imagined the climbing on mountain in sari pic cutemonster gave faintingsmileysari the much i love it is often disturbing me) and i saw other females doing that too - modernising traditional clothes and mixing them with whatever we feel most comfortable in. Other times i wear jeans and shirt or salwaar kameez, chudidar....

    conclusion from my side... its great how versatile women are

    I think a streight and clear judgement wud be just possible if all females wud be allowed and able to wear freely and safe whatever they feel happy with, no judgements no comments no inapropriate approachings.
     
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