Discussion in 'General Discussions' started by SuiDhaaga, Sep 14, 2020.
Yep, is there a problem?
I would have been highly offended if someone were to suggest that pregnancy “ruined” my body. That is not how most people see it. It is true that a woman’s body changes after carrying children but that’s what it is: a change. A change that many willingly and joyfully embrace.
And even if a woman does not have children no one is immune to the march of time.
It’s okay to have one’s opinion about this subject as it pertains to one’s one body but I would not project it onto others.
Malstorm I see where you are coming from. I am yet to think your way because I am yet to experience joy of Motherhood. Never did I think I was projecting onto others. Please excuse.
I was offended by the double -standard that a girl gets married, bears a man's children. She makes sacrifices for those children but the man, and most likely his mother make HER life a living hell that she has to leave (surely you read stories on IL about this)
The girl does not have a loving husband and the children are no longer in an intact home.
Meanwhile the mans mother can use the cover of God to get another girl for her son, and other people (like my distant relative) assume that because the mother goes to Hindu temple, her son must be from good Hindu family and must be good.
In other words, the man's previous wife is disposable after she gave him and his family three children whose family is now broken. And our culture enables this.
Don't you also find that offensive?
No, I do not find it offensive. I do not know why they got a divorce and I will not blame the man without having any details. For all that I know, the divorce was a no blame divorce and requested by the wife. I do not know any of these details.
FYI- I have a second cousin who got married at 19, had a child at 20 and got separated the same year. The daughter grew up with the father while my cousin moved overseas for her masters and fell in love with a fellow student. My cousin’s ex-husband did not remarry. Please do not vilify my cousin-her parents married her off at an early age and she did not know any better. Her ex-husband holds no grudge against her. They do not co-parent, my cousin visits India every two three years and meets her daughter at a coffee shop or restaurant and they go shopping. Not every story has a villain and shades of gray is legit.
Yes. A huge problem.
But don't ask me what is the problem. I wouldn't know where to begin.
I like your honest reply. That is why I post here, to get different viewpoints and incidents.
I do not vilify your cousin at all. And I am sure your cousin, her ex-husband and their child are doing fine in their lives.
By the way my distant relative replied with "Good Question" and explained the following:
According to the Hindu temple mom, the ex-wife was greedy for money for vacations, jewelry, etc and claimed her ex-husband depleted their accounts so he can develop a product he invented. After divorce he sold his product and got $$$. Ex wife works and lives alone. They have 50-50 custody.
@MalStrom was right when she said there is his side, her side and the truth.
I attempt my response here in a lighter vein.
Since it is not mentioned in the post, I assume all three past deliveries by “C” section. She might have decided not to take chances with fourth one and being staunch hindu orthodox she & her family could be against preventing future babies production artificially and or not to face any life threatening situations.
Thanks and Regards.
Acrimony starring Taji Henson
That sounds like a hectic and happening movie. What would happen if Tyler Perry included Madea?