Who initiated the conversation about having kids in your family?

In our case both of us wanted to postpone it for sometimes since we were too busy in our respective careers and were hoping for getting promotions there. Further, we were not sure where to settle (whether in home or abroad) since we were in abroad during/after the marriage for sometimes.

It was my mom who started this topic of kids. My MIL followed her as both of them were eager to see the first grand kid of their families. Then I was carried away by them, and moved back to home. Although H and FIL were against to it, I somehow convinced them to have my first kid 2 yrs after my marriage.

I had faced a lot of tragic events followed by my first delivery, but seeing my son, and the bond that he created in our family life, I think he was an angel sent by God to give me unconditional happiness and protection in this life

 

dh asked me why I wanted to get married and I my reply was that I have had a successful, fulfilling career, have made ample money now I want to have the same in a family life I want to get married, learn to cook, maintain a beautiful house have kids.
DH wanted to wait for 1-2 yrs for kids to get to know each other before having kids but I conteracted that I have not quit for sitting at home twiddling my thumbs that too in a totally new city.. DH reminded me that I want to start up a course and that I can do that.
I said I will do it side by side and my dh was of the opinion that either you go back full time after kid is 2-3 yrs old or study full time. So that was it and later my beautiful daughter was born.
No one other than both of us ever talked about kids though just before my 2nd one was conceived my dh and mom both tried to persuade me not to take another chance and be satisfied with 1 child but that was for health reasons. My IL never interfered.

 

My husband wanted kids soon after we got married but I didn't. I wanted to settle down first. Everyone interfered and nagged and advised but since I was one who had to be the primary carer, I refused.

Due to various other reasons my marriage was shaky and I was focusing on figuring out whether to fix or dump it. Again advice from everyone was to have a child to cement our relationship which I just felt was so wrong. I did not heed to it.

about 6 years after we got married we found out balance, and led a blissful life for the next couple of years - our honeymoon period. Then we decided to start a family. It took us over a year and a half to get pregnant. It finally happened and my dd was born.

I must say say all out equilibrium was shattered soon after she was born due to lack of sleep, both of is wishing well but different things for her etc. Even now our major point of contention is the nitty gritties involved in how to raise or handle our daughter.

 

Both of us wanted to have babies soon after marriage as we love kids so much. My MIL was boosting how younger BIL's wife got pregnant 3 months after their wedding. My parent didn't interfere in our decision and to them its our life and our decision to make.

I became pregnant and had my DS the same year . The decision to have children should be made by the husband and wife only. Age, career stability and financial should considered before making the decision to have kids.

 

we too initially planned to postpone for one year but happened accidently and again when planned to have kids so that time didnt happen .. so its all GODs plan and should keep praying .. both should plan and decide then only will get good kids. kindly avoid ILs or parents to judge this matter

 

no one...mistakes happen you know....wonderful mistakes..

 

It is the reality. Had i been waiting for a peaceful/stable marriage life to have kids, I will have to wait another 10-20 yrs, and I am not even sure whether this equilibrium will be stable after the new one's arrival.

I decided not to waste any day of my life, but work on a daily basis to make it beautiful. When I was pretty sure that I can handle the situation quite well than normal, I decided to bring kids on time.

Now my marriage is stable, kids are growing, and I take life as one day at a time. The foundation of marital issue is misunderstanding. When it is cleared up, even similar issues pops up in the future, I think we can sort it up with an understanding heart.

Sorry OP for taking a different direction...

 

It was me who wanted kids first we was tensed to have(due to financial reasons)
my in-laws from day one were at the back of me and my parents 8 mths after marriage but my hubby took 2yrs time