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Which is a better life : Married OR Single ?

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by geeta79, Jun 5, 2007.

  1. geeta79

    geeta79 Bronze IL'ite

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    Hi there all IL ites,

    Im geeta. Im new to this site. Was going through the discussions and views of women around the world. Its was really nice to read everyones thoughts about different subjects.

    I would like to ask a question to all you women out there, especially those who have been married. Which do you think is a better life : the Married one or the Single one. I guess there may be many singles also out there. So just let me know your views about this topic.

    As for me, i have been married since 6 months, so i just wanted to know what do other women think about their lives after marriage. Is it good, is it bad? Let me know ladies..........

    Regards,
    Geeta.
     
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  2. gokusha

    gokusha IL Hall of Fame

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    Hi Geeta,

    Welcome to our site..I'm sure you are gonna enjoy this journey daily...with all of us. Again this is nice, intersting topic too...

    According to me, i vote for married. Though our independence level get decreases littlebit.I still say marriage gives you respect in society, prepares her/him physically and mentally to face tough situations.

    Mainly it teaches us how to share our thoughts, comprise with others, which i don't think you will get chance in Single life.

    In life you always feel better if you have companion with you. Though expect few things, we enjoy the taste of preparing dishes, things for our beloved ones... gives hand in their tough situation, feel comfort when you are cared and loved by one specially.


    Regards,
    USHA.


    PHP:
     
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  3. Abha

    Abha Bronze IL'ite

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    Hey Geeta

    First of all Same Pinch to you, as i too have been married for 6 months now...

    what you have started is interesting and equally difficult to comment on, topic. :) .

    Being single, i was always with my parents, i have never lived in any hostel for studies, my sis got married a long time back and away from home, so i have even enjoyed priviliges of an only child as well.... In fact my dad never even used to let me stay at any relatives home overnight as he used to feel awkward in my absence... this life was great i think, parents attention showered on you all the time... what should we have tonite ? which restaurant shud we go ? which tiles shud we buy for kitchen ? or what color should be the walls ? everything decided by me. haha. My dad calls me Hitler...

    But then you get married and things change... for good of course...
    but then, you eat what you husband wants to eat or what other family members want to eat... its not that u r not asked " what do u want to eat beta " but "beta" it seems has left her tongue in her own house...:) Me being highly calorie conscious, used to ask my mom to make things which my mom had to make separately for me... now i'm not able to maintain my Low Cal Diet as I can cook only once and that wud be obviously what my husband likes... i like it too but then that spoils my calorie count...

    hmmmmm so there really cant be one way about this... I loved being single and I have fallen in love with my marriage.

    ~Abha
     
  4. ramya_psk

    ramya_psk Senior IL'ite

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    Hi geeta,
    Welcome to this site.Wow!!!
    Wonderfull topic.According to me i will vote for married life .I feel a women is secured more in married life and can njoy in all aspects.You cannot share all your views and topic with ur parents ,but you can share evrything with your partner.


    Ramya
     
  5. Anushiv

    Anushiv Senior IL'ite

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    Hi Geetha,

    I'm also new to this thread...I do think about it ( this topic) very often!
    How will I be now..without marriage?? good?better? or worse?
    well, now after 8 yrs of marriage, having two children...
    I feel,Marriage is an eye-opener. It's a transformation from one phase to another!
    It helps u to understand about others better...esp.. relatives!
    I personally feel, it (marriage) kindles ur love,caring & sharing qualities which is hidden in u!


    cheers!
    Anu Shiv
     
  6. manisha13

    manisha13 New IL'ite

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    hi all
    If u are enjoying ur married life,have a loving husband,supporting in-laws,everything is hunky-dowry,obviously u will go for married one,but if its contrary,i mean u r living in a hell in the name of marriage then who would vote for married life,so there it goes according to one's experience.
    Also i feel there are some changes in life for good,like getting married at right age,so that u have enjoyed the life as a single to the fullest,and now ready to take off to discover 'shaadi ka laddoo',and then setting urself for motherhood........ and so on.
    so in a sense the two can't be comapared,if one's life is going through different phases on time,i don't think i would be able to vote for one in particular,that is what i feel,in this world of different views.:2thumbsup:
    manisha
     
  7. Padmash

    Padmash Platinum IL'ite

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    hi,

    i am really confused to say which one is better as Manisha said when things goes alright married life is good when it comes to problems its really headache. Married life brings so many new relations new ideas new responsibilities all of sudden, but when we ae single responsibilities are there but if anything goes wrong parents handle it very easily and we are free of worries. I feel more free as a single with my parents eventhough i have happy married life but ------ this word but comes in between.

    bye
     
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  8. Ria2006

    Ria2006 Silver IL'ite

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    "Being single" is a beautiful preparatory step to a long journey of life, whose destination is to grow wise and old with an assuring and bonded companion. Marriage is that road where we sometime race, sometime drag, sometime skip signals sometime end up with broken car..but it finally takes you to the destination your journey was leading to.

    With above poetic and glossy description, more real outlook is.. I think marriage is like going to college after finishing school. One day people should graduate to being more wise people.. Thats whole goal of it.

    But I can give you list of things which make marriage so complex thing ..

    We all come into marriage thinking.. Our spouse will suddenly love us as much as parents were doing. They would be as selfless as our parents were.. When there s too much "me" from both partners, that's where marriage become hard way to grow.. But seeing this forum's queries and listening other friends in real life. I feel most of the time our answer lies in our questions..
    Only if we could practice to expect less, give more.. question less, trust more..
    And for most of the gals, I think they have right intentions, they just dont have patience and faith that their goodness will pay off one day..

    Being Single was something I had enjoyed more than most of folks. I was on my own for some 12 years. So I am sure I can give you a fair amount of experience I gathered.. Being single was always amazing with just right amount of care and freedom from parents. But after a point a stage comes..what next.. and thats where Marriage comes in picture. So to me marriage was beginning of new paragraph in my story of my life. Childhood and being single being first few paragraphs.. And I am sure I would as well like to see other fourth fifth and next paras added as a mother, an in-law and a granny.. And see u dont get to lay hands to other paras.. if one chooses to only stick with first two paragraphs. So you see my point. Marriage is a step in making ur life full circle. You give back to your kids what ur parents did to u.. You return the affection u got from ur grand parents to ur grand kids..

    Cheers,
    RIa:wave
     
  9. Abha

    Abha Bronze IL'ite

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    Hey Ria

    u have said it all very nicely... i agree with this completely

    after stidies one starts thinking of working and then while working u think of getting ahead in ur career and then one time come u start thinking, now what ??? and that is when marriage comes in your mind... its not that we never have thot of marriage... girls quite often think about being with their partner and think abt life aftere marriage... and so u get married... so life does become complete actually, when u find someone who makes you feel complete...

    ~Abha



     
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  10. GPriya

    GPriya Bronze IL'ite

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    Hi Geeta,

    I am a Geeta too... nice thread to express our views..

    Single or married...which is better..

    As almost everyone mentioned that there is no comparison.

    But there are Pros and cons for both.

    If only married life brings in all the things it is supposed to, then the married life is the best any time for anybody. If it brings atleast a good, understanding companianship, you can still consider marriage is the best. If not, it is the WORST that can happen to anybody -- more agony, lack of respect, freedom etc.,

    Whereas in single life, you are atleast not expected to undergo the major issues that comes with marriage. But you always long for the companionship you miss out thinking that if you had been married to, things would be different.

    It is wonderful to have a person to share everything with..but it is a bit of lottery winning to get what you want in married life. The chances are very less.
    It is a roller coaster as it brings both excitement and fear and so it makes you feel more matured having undergone both good and bad side of the life.
    One has to be adventurous to emerge from married life as a WINNER.

    In single life, though it is a bit monotonous, you can still retain your peace, continue all your activities without being questioned or judged by anybody with no excitement or fear.

    To conclude, if you have good friends, a great career with good income and loving parents/siblings, and you want to remain as single, you can save a great deal of agony for yourself and miss out lot of excitement too.

    If you are flexible, patient, diplomatic, hard working, always caring for others how crappy they are, willing to part with your money, body, emotions, space and everything you own, to get the much needed companionship in life (with no certainties if it would last forever!!!!!) then you can marry and try out with the best of intentions...

    I am married for 21 years and my opinion is not only based on my life but a whole group of friends of my age group.

    I guess i made my point as usual by confusing you all:yes:

    :wave Geeth Priya.
     
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