If the lady sends money to her MIL or husband's siblings, she should take care to protect herself from the heartache and sorrow that can ensue after such acts. She should keep in mind the depth of wisdom in the saying: No good deed goes unpunished. She should be extremely clear in her mind about why she is helping them. The reasons to help should border on selfish. It can be to honor her husband's wishes or memory, to set a good example for her children, to gain some karma brownie points, because it is the right and humane thing to do. She should give the help with zero expectations. She should not expect that the in-laws will appreciate or acknowledge her kindness or whatever. OTOH, she should be prepared for reactions like these from them: "All that insurance money and retirement accounts, now she is sole owner of the house ... and sending us a pittance." Once the India people see that money is continuing, they can feel free to ask for bigger one time amounts. Does she want to help with those? If she doesn't, even the money that she sends regularly will be viewed negatively. If the MIL needs expensive medical care and hospitalization, the in-laws can expect the lady to foot the entire bill like the man would have. Does she want to do that? If she does not want to do that, then again, all her other help will be discounted. So, if she decides to continue the monetary help, she should reflect on why exactly she is doing that, have _zero_ expectations and be prepared for criticism from the in-laws.