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What was your inlaws reaction, when u revealed to them that you have conceived??

Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by blessed, Jan 6, 2010.

  1. blessed

    blessed Platinum IL'ite

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    Hi friends,

    Just started this thread out of curiosity.

    How did you tell your in laws the good news that you are pregnant and how was their reaction.

    My experience (13 years back)

    When I missed my periods after 4 months of our wedding, I was so happy to react and I knew 100% I have conceived because I have never had a delayed periods, strangely even my DH knew about this even before I could tell him probably because of the morning sickness.

    Then after 15-20 days he requested his cousin sis who stays in the next lane to take me to a gynoch... and my MIL who knew about all the commotions did'nt show any reaction. That evening we came home and his cousin congratulated my DH in loud tone that "my pregancy is confirmed" and turned to my MIL and said " u are going to be Nanamma now" (paternal grandma) and guess friends what was her reply?

    " What is so great about this, even dogs and cats give birth"
    I felt something hit me hard, I was shattered for a moment, but then gained all my strenght and went to call my parents and my well wishers who will really happy with the news.

    So tell me about your experience ladies.
     
    Last edited: Jan 6, 2010
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  2. Aarthibhuvan

    Aarthibhuvan Senior IL'ite

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    Hi Blessed,

    you reminded me of my days during my pergency. I was very happy when my results were positive.

    I was expecting my in-laws to jump in happiness as this was their first Grandchild but to my shock my MIL did not show any sign of happiness / no reaction when i told her the news.
    regards,
    Aarthi
     
  3. KripaChn

    KripaChn New IL'ite

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    I was married and just after 6 months my MIL said to me "en ponnunga kalyanam ana orae masathula tharichuduvanga" (My daughters got conceived in just 1month after marriage). I used to reply "I will also when God bless's me and would not react further".
    After marriage I used to do the cooking for all and washing for my DH and myself. My DH is the first in the family of six siblings.
    When I actually conceived after 7 months of marriage I thought she will take care of me and my child in the womb but to my shock she served such a good food that my gynac scolded my husband during my 5th month checkup stating that you are wife is underfed and aneamic...my MIL would always help me with puliyodarai in the mornings as that was the only easy stuff she could do. Prepare puli kachal in the night. Prepare rice in the morning. Mix it . Finally, my FIL asked me to go to my mother's house stating that your MIL will kill you and the baby. luckily my FIL was a nice and considerate man. MIL's are MIL's
     
  4. lavii

    lavii Gold IL'ite

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    blessed
    i am sorry to say but your mil is crazy
    how can she compare son and dil to cats and dogs
    coming to mine
    we planned for a baby after 2-3 yrs of marriage but after my dads death we changed our decision
    and i thought my mil will be most happiest to hear the news becuase she was always raising a question as to why we dont have kids in 1 yr marriage even though we mentioned her we planned later
    we did HPT and was postive and went to doc next day to confirm and after we got confirmation
    i took a sweet box to my mom and in laws..and to my surprise my mil was normal took the sweet and said first 3 months there is no gurantey and 90% chances of miscarraige so dont be overwhelmed ...
    they never call me even now to check how i am? or howz health.i go to them weekends and spend time with them irrespective of wheather my health is good or bad or if i had office on that day or not i have to go ..
    any ways i stopped expecting now..
     
  5. rosenav

    rosenav Silver IL'ite

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    Thats really sad how MILs have reacted, I always thought that they look forward fr there grand children.

    Coming to my story...

    My MIL was very excited , we have planned after 3yrs and since my DH is MIL heart n soul both of them were on seventh heaven.

    I'm in India at my Moms plc, my ILS plc is abt 3hrs aways frm my plc, thought they have being so many bhandhs and violence in hyd... my MIL makes sure she travels every weekend to see me with out fail.
    Need not say I'm a victim of "Over pampering ":biglaugh
     
    1 person likes this.
  6. SupSam

    SupSam Senior IL'ite

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    Although we wanted to plan the same after at least an year but some such circumstances were raised in home and added over by MIL's insisting for a baby , I conceived after 3rd mth of marriage...but no doubt...all at home were very very happy...and SIL and MIL started keeping pet names....making woollens and sheets and all day long they kept waiting for the day to come. Although I didnt get much of work support but mental support by them...there was enough :)
     
  7. rojarani

    rojarani New IL'ite

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    Hi friends,

    For me when my husband told the news to my in law, first reaction was dont let her eat much(actually i eat very very less, my dh got angry said that anyway she is not a good eater) she will gain more weight and dont let her sit with this reason let her do all the same work as before.

    and she came for my delivery and showed how the hell will be. second time when i was pregnant we did housewarming just 1 day after confirmation, she was forcing me to do all the household works she is feeling very bad that her son is doing hard work and i'm sitting happily but i also did a lot of work i did the housewarming ceremony by crying weeping till the puja is done, as she is scolding behind she uses very very bad abusive words... i was so scared that and feared , she insulted my parents, she was complaining that " she cant do for 1 son she wants another baby let em see how she will do" the situation was my sil's husband giving bath to his kids who r 8&5 years, and my husband gave bath to my 3 years son, she got angry that i cant give bath to my son.

    i had that misscarriage, again i want to run away from that house with reason of pregnancy, i got preganant, she again abused me a lot with lot of words( anyway i have to do all the house chores without servant maid and cook them 3 times a day very heavily.)
    i had medical abortion again, i kept servant maid only for 1 month when i came back, she abused me like horribly that ur a rogisthi unhealthy lady how we married u, this that, and scolded for keeping servant maid.

    this is how my mil's reaction. but i dont want to give up becoz of her i dont want to make my son lonely.
    so i'm in my 11th week now. doing all the househodl chores without servant maid and cooking as per their menu( in my mom's place i was bought up like a doll).waiting to go to my mom's place for delivery.

    thanking u.

    thank u,
     
  8. blessed

    blessed Platinum IL'ite

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    Roja Rani, I shed tears reading your reply.
    Yes it is true that most of the DIL's in Indian homes have very painful memory of their pregnancies, for me it was a night mare.

    No healthy food, all I got is stale food, I dont know why my MIL use to cook extra food and keep it for the next day, so I have to finish the previous days one's first and then go for the fresh ones and this cycle went on till my 9th month, no fruits, no milk, no going out with DH, and when I sit down on the floor in certain angle she use to scream at me telling that I will certainly give birth to handicapped kid and no one in her family has this history, ( as if my family as history of handicap children)belive me I had to hear this every alternative day and because of this I use have very bad night mares. luckily I have birth to a bubbly healthy female baby.
     
    Last edited: Jan 6, 2010
  9. RamyaKrishn

    RamyaKrishn Silver IL'ite

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    Yeah, becoming a mommy is definitely a wonderful experience but its how ppl react & treat us during those days make it vital and enjoyable!!!

    V decided not to have kids for 2 yrs & v let our family know about it!!! But I was always being compared to d eldest DIL, my SIL's & my husbands aunts daughter :-D, cos all of 'em had babies with in a yr of their wedding!!!

    2 years went by things dint change, my inlaws said that I had some problems conceiving obviously d talk in d entire family :rant... 2 yrs passed by & incidentally what needs to happen happened & I know d day I skipped my cycle and so did d test speak for it...

    After a good 3&1/2 months V revealed it to my inlaws they r happy, no cribbing guess they understood v needed our time alone:thumbsup...
     
  10. asuitablegirl

    asuitablegirl Gold IL'ite

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    WE???? I would have told her "Shut up you ugly cow, I married your son, not YOU." Grrrr. :rant
     
    Last edited: Jan 6, 2010
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