We all do a lot of things based on responsibilities or based on society or need etc. Leaving all that aside.. Who really are you? Are you 100 percent living an authentic life true to your values?What makes you truly happy?
Let me begin with me..Am still a work in progress I used to force myself to socialize,look a certain way,more into brands and try to look good in others eyes. I realized it is such a waste of time. Things I do to be my authentic self.. I stopped buying anything in the trend or just to own it. Focusing more on quality and need. I try to mingle with people whom I vibe.Rest are all acquaintances now. Socialization a lot drains me. I finally accepted the fact that my relatives are toxic and stop excusing their behavior.One of the most painful time for me but well worth it in the end. I focus more on myself now. I do more of what makes me happy like a walk in the park,good food and eating my full.I used to worry about weight gain but honestly I have relaxed.As long as am healthy am fine. I wear clothes which do not make me conscious and only which looks appealing for me. I accepted the fact there will be testing times,bored times etc but they are a part of life. I try more on self reflection instead of the blame game. I am going with the flow of life and trying to stop find answers and controlling life. practicing gratitude.. It is going to be a forever journey but each day is getting better I feel
i am looking forward to be with my kids and hubby.. with this busy life and especially with pandemic after my daughter arrived we are not able to go out much so looking forward for our upcoming vacation next month... we hoping and believing everything turns out to be good... i am hoping to get couple of works for my self so i can breath and relax all myself.. sometimes we do tired of kids nagging, and kitchen work,cleaning..
I was a people pleaser before aka putting extra effort to be available for others needs but slowly parting away to be available where it is nearly needed or valued otherwise I am very well enjoying with family or spending time with self is giving me immense happiness over anything!! I was extremely naive before and used to believe if one is nice and respectful to the opposite person, they will reciprocate the same gesture, but I was so wronged in many scenarios and now I identify who are genuinely nice over benefitted nice/taking advantage nice.
Travelling makes me happy..having deep, meaningful conversations makes me happy. Counting my blessings connects me to god..i practice gratitude..that is a different feeling. I hate showing off, teasing people for what they are lacking in life..Brands and owning expensive things I think..drains you more than making you happy. Bcoz you look for appreciation and acknowledgement once you own these brands which means you are giving key to your happiness in others hands.
Three questions need to be answered for which introspection needed. Cogitate and find out answers for “ for whom we strive, for whose benefit we act, and why we do or act so?” A labourer after toiling in scorching son found sleeping happily on his back on a culvert on noon time while his bullocks tied To cart underneath shade of a large tree. He woke up when i asked him about his happiness, he responded - “immensely “. This gives an idea true happiness is not derived from material possession nor depend upon enlarged fruends’ circle nor the exotic foods or fruits. It is only state of mind. It is found possession of a large plasma TV, a display on neck an expensive choker or a designer dress all could give only pleasure for some time and enviable joy for onlookers but not happiness. Many fail to distinguish happiness from pleasure. Do they all one and the same? Philosophers and matured ripe elders say true happiness emerges only when one render selfless service to others in deep trouble or and others in impoverished state and helping the indigents and those in chronic illness etc. Mother Theresa derived happiness by serving those afflicted with despicable skin disease. Monks said to have peace of mind as they are neither turn happy or sad with events or happenings. A state of happiness comes only after experiencing a period of sadness or unhappiness. There is nothing called true or absolute happiness in life. The Law of Diminishing Utility comes to mind. A thing or object or an event or a food fail to give constant happiness as one is exposed to it too often. The thing gave happiness yesterday or an hour before fail to produce same level of happiness or satisfaction to me tomorrow or an hour after. Dear @anika987 I presume i have attempted answering all three questions posed by you? If these answers are irrelevant kindly ignore. I think one should live and do things not for those invisible four in the society who may seldom show concern for others’ welfare. One should do things which helps derive happiness for himself or herself. God Bless.
Thanks to @svpriya for her “like” here. I am HAPPY that you clicked like here. Since yesterday you are raining “likes” to many and am one of those beneficiaries. You are on reading spree it seems. I must invite you to read more forums to derive more and more happiness and knowledge which leads to other gateways. A thrilling story - in link - you might be interested to click & read perhaps: Tight Schedule- Spouse, Rat & 'craft
Interesting. But the crux is by the time one determines the toxicity or and fakeness, in many cases damage might have already begun. My presidency college pal Geology Venkatramani comes to mind. For every statement, he would argue for the opposite of it. To tackle this friend , whenever i desired “yes” from him, i would begin with “NO” and he is bound to say “yes”. I get my “happiness” this way from him. He turned out to be an advocate later instead a geologist.
