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What is the reason why brides can't adjust with in-laws?

Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by abhisheknagpal1, Apr 28, 2013.

  1. Nessie

    Nessie Silver IL'ite

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    Importantly the bride shouldn't be living together with her in-laws. That would eliminate the major reason for her, having to adjust.
     
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  2. suasin

    suasin Gold IL'ite

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    One reason..
    Just because fish lives in water, you want them to 'adjust' living in hot water!!!!
     
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  3. swaroo

    swaroo Silver IL'ite

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    Ladies! Better we ignore this here . OPs question itself is not justified. It is the girl who is coming into the family. So the in laws should create an atmosphere where she can actually ''adjust'' and feel like home. It's not that the bride has to adjust from day1. Men haven't and will never understand. This is coming since ages. Poor guys we can't blame them either. They never got into our shoes right?
    As far as this person's question is concerned may be his mom was an exception (or at least he feels like that) and his ex wife is being blamed. So whatever we write, he would only relate it to his life and situation rather than our generalized opinions. He also said that he wants to know the psychology. What does he mean by that? It implies in may ways..whose psychology he wants to analyze, the man's or the bride's or the in laws's ? First let him be clear with his question and intention rather than keeping quiet and watching a saas bahu serial here. Looks like he's having fun reading the post.

    PS: No way regretting for what I said now.
     
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  4. meenurani

    meenurani Silver IL'ite

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    For a change you try to live with your wife's parents after marriage for few years and you will find the answer yourself.
     
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  5. ppriya182010

    ppriya182010 Gold IL'ite

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    Rather why should brides adjust to in-laws? Why not in-laws adjust to DILs? Why not husbands adjust to wife and PILs? There could be a lot of whys and why nots.

    Our society is biased and thats the fundamental problem.If both men and women are treated equally,everyone will be happy.But reality is never the ideal scenarios.

    Why is it always girl gets married and enter into in-laws? Why not boy get married and enter into girl's family? This is the basis for all marital problems.
     
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  6. heron

    heron Platinum IL'ite

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    Adjust is what we do for 1 or 2 things... Brides are demanded to get transformed...brides aren't from ' Optimus Prime' tribe.
     
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  7. nb25

    nb25 Gold IL'ite

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    Why not frame the question as "What is the reason in laws and bride have problems adjusting to each other"?

    How long will women continue struggling to overthrow the stereotype of the mild-mannered, demure, adjusting woman? This is the 21st century, OP, and adjusting brides are a fast depleting commodity.

    How about having some adjustment from in laws for a change?
     
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  8. Weasly

    Weasly Gold IL'ite

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    all of the above !!
     
  9. Akanksha1982

    Akanksha1982 IL Hall of Fame

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    OP, can you please explain what you mean by "adjust"? The marriage brings a lot of change in us, like wearing mangalsutra, waking up in the morning, spending a lot of time in the kitchen, cleaning, taking care of husband - his laundry, his timings, his food habits, giving up on the eating out, going out with friends, watching movies outside with friends, sleeping when we like, watching tv serials in the living room, restricting the areas in the house where PILs are, etc.
     
  10. hope2b

    hope2b Silver IL'ite

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    I wish to ask the groom how come he is not even ready to consider, leave alone adjust the new bride's required transformation?
     

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