What is the REALITY ???? Return to India...

Kalpana- For me adapting to a new circumstance has been easy maybe because of survival instincts or that is how cope. As soon as I face a set back or adversity, my mind goes instantly to survival mode of " how can I make this situation better or how can I get out of it". I cannot sit and dwell on it but rather instantly want to come out of it.

I have faced loss of a loved one and that is the only situation which has broken me but for every other set back I bounced back quick.

I spent my initial school years in North India so being one of the few south Indian, I had to fit in. But I grew up in a small town and from there I moved to Bangalore which among all south Indian cities is very cosmopolitan. Moving to a big city was a huge transition. I think living in Bangalore made it very easy for me to fit in US. Also unlike a lot of ladies who come here after marriage, I came to study and it is very easy to fit into a Uni setting and make friends.

My first real job in US was working with various clients and different teams. I prefer consistency but excelling in this job meant being comfortable with change.

Then I married an American man. Another thing that I did not plan or expected. So it became that much important to keep an open mind and embrace his family just as much as they embraced mine.

You point about fitting is very important for everyone. No matter where we are, if we want to be welcome, we have to fit in to that environment. Even in India, if you are a south Indian in North ( or vice versa) and you refuse to open your heart and mind to the culture and festivals and food etc, others would find it difficult to welcome you to their fold. Living in a different country is the same- we as outsiders need to make some extra effort to mingle and adapt. You will never feel at home if you always consider your self an outsider.


I don't know how it is like in other parts of the world (not have lived anywhere except India and US) but I think Americans are for most part the most friendly lot. I would only tell you if you have kids, create an environment where they are raised with Indian values but at the same time able to fit in the world they live in comfortable or they will end up misfits.