What is my SIL greatness? Am I unable to understand anything?

Thanks for the Reply @Priya16.
I did put foot down and did things my way. One incident

when my inlaws were with us Vinayaka chavithi festival came. As every year i did complete indian style, nice eco friendly idol( for which i roamed many shops)
Food items, flowers decorated ub flower vase around god, and opened up all my silver pooja thalis and decorated the entire table etc.
while i was discussing abt doing this previous day. My MIL passed on the message to SIL previous day on phone.

I woke up at 6 am doing all preparations of naivedyam and was about to start puja at 9 am. my SIL call came, usually she doesnt call us in morning.she calls and says something to parents who usually talks in room with her. But they were sitting in hall that day and says. See her puja is already completed, in our house it didnt even start. She completed already, its over already, they are like jumping in joy.

I didnt expect anyone to praise me that i am doing puja coz i am doing for my kids and i love it but even in that they bought a comparison and express to me that i am slow than her. which really made me so upset. i was like " what nonsense these people are.

I am sure she didnt get idol etc but just deepam coz i know that. I asked my hubby polite way, ask her to send pic in whatsapp and i was right. she just kept diya at ganesh pic in her puja cupboard and kept pulihora which she will take as lunch box.

I told my inlaws, come see my puja then you will understand how it is different from what she did. she didnt get idol and any decoration, no answer from them. put their heads down and sat at puja.
They understood i got angry. and my hubby atleast this time told me to ignore it in polite way. so i kept quite.

 

@ YellowMango

Super like what you said. You are exactly right, no i am not feeling bad for what you told about my hubby. It is not that i hate my husband but it reminds me the torture i beared when i had my first kid. Its been a very long way and now at 12 yrs of marriage my husband did change for good.
On the materinity leave incident - first asked my boss for 4 weeks vacation. and i emailed my hubby and expected he would say take more weeks off and he says "do you need 4 weeks" my sis started working in 2 weeks only. i think 2 weeks should be fine you will be normal. I asked my MIL once and she said may be 3 weeks i dont remember, so i highly doubt how truth is that statement. during her 2nd delivery which was my 1st delivery she took 8 weeks vacation.
My MIL told him she was doing all house hold work and her waterbroke while doing some work. so he used to tell me, you can go to work till the last day of your delivery.
I argued and took 4 weeks.
4 weeks i started working and i should do cooking coz my SIL and MIL were cooking even during their delivery date. now i am so lucky that i got 4 weeks off.
my mom dad were there so they helped me.
3 days after delivery coming home and i should help my hubby holding the car seat coz infact SIL used to hold baby car seat , her husband never helped her.
My parents were shocked and were so upset seeing my life.

My husband says all american ladies are coming back to work after 6 weeks. infact some doctors work after 1 week of delivery so he says no need of taking any off.

Yes my SIL is a FTE past 5 yrs and only comes my home. my hubby says she invited us but let her come our house is small. Now this time i did say lets go2 her house and he saying that we should go her house for 3 days only. He keeping the reason that he dont have vacation.
But the real reason is he dont want his sister to get stressed cooking for 2 weeks and she will not even ask us, come eat dinner or lunch. same proud behavior of self dabba. so he is scared i am going to pin point.

 

@ yellowmango and @1Sandhya.

I dont know how to change my husband. coz its not husband or SIL. they all gang up and tell this stories of SIL working hard coz they want me to work like a dog. There are so many lies in what they tell me. I realize many things when we meet yearly once. My husband would nag a lot and wake me up at 7 am during weekends also saying women shouldnt sleep. SIL wakes up at 10 am and doesnt even feed her kids breakfast. so when i saw them i asked you waking up at 10 am. she says at home she wakes up early. but her kids said they all wake up late. My point is telling lies and then behaving very proud as if she is so great infront of me.

@ Rihana

Yes the SIL kids love me and i love them too. I see the girl especially looking for some girly talk and walk behind me all time. I didnt want to sound rude but the girl asks the mother to come sit with her in movie hall and my SIL goes and sits beside the hubby. the boy wakes up sitting on the kitchen top asking breakfast and my SIL is doing exercise.
well its her business and i didnt criticise.but when hubby and she themselves pointed out that i should loose weight i got very angry on them.

Thats another story, her kids got so close to me last visit and she was very upset and scolded her daughter badly for coming outside with me. I did tell my husband and he was quite. i am sure he didnt tell anything to his sister.
Especially the girl who is in her teens now dont get along well with the mother and very close to me. so i am not sure how to respond. But in this 2 week trips the girl is the one i enjoy and have some good time or else i will end up having big fights.