What is happening to me ????

Aksh,

You might also want to do a little google search on new fatherhood and depression.

Parenthood affects men as much as women. Sadly, their issues are overlooked since the underlying (faulty!) assumption that since they did little, its not tough on them; that they did not have to undergo labor, did not have to go through physiological changes etc. The truth is, new-parenthood affects men and there is little emotional support for men to turn to at that juncture.

Search a little online about how new-fatherhood changes your life, and talk to someone trusted, perhaps a friend who has gone through being a new parent recently.

Good luck, and enjoy your new baby!

 

Aksh,

Things will be fine. Maybe she is going through a phase after childbirth. Hang on man, you will be alright. Love will prevail.

 

Naksh, I can kind of understand what you mean as I can relate your situation to ours.
Even after quite a few years of marriage, its my DH who always gives in - and he's quite a darling for that. Its only of late that I have started learning the "giving in" act. I used to behave the exact same way as your wife.. in the beginning I would get upset with my DH for every small thing.. and in return got used to his pampering and "giving in". So much so that, just as you say, I would start feeling miserable and cry if he doesnt do that - and till he does that. Poor DH, sometimes he would lose his patience..

I think you should have a balance.. dont give in too much. First fix your wife's expectations right. Have at least one frank chat, where you convey to her that you love her, you dont mind giving in because you love her, but she cant expect that from you always as you are a human being too. So she better grow up and stop expect being pampered all the time.

And mark my words, both of you will get used to these situations and learn to laugh over it as days go on. Every day into marriage gives us some learning no matter how many years you've been in it. But the fact that the initial years are bound to be swaying (no matter how much you love each other) until you start settling down slowly, cant be stressed enough. Initially we dream of being a perfect couple, (which is next to impossible in my opinion) and when we find thats not so, we tend to get disheartened and numerous questions starting popping up from our head..

So relax.. things will change.. Good luck

 

Aksh, do you belong to the category of people who get easily bored of their possession & need something new now?

There are quite a few people who over explore and over involve like a supersonic jet and with an equal speed get bored & back off and search for new gadget or a relation.

 

Take a reality check. You have been married for only 13 months and you have a baby. However much you dont realise, having a baby changes priorities for a mother because she is the main caretaker for the baby, usually. Romance also takes a back seat with a crying baby at night right? But usually when the baby grows up a little bit things should be back to normal. Almost.

 

Changing family is a difficult task to do even till date.. whilst changing wives is affordable by multi-billionaires & hollywood stars.. remaining men mark wives as family.. hence can't be changed :rotfl:rotfl.

Its gud that you feel changed.. however the intensity of your inputs into the relation has come down... Eg: you dont feel moved when she drops a tear as it was in initial days. Old habits die hard & I just wish that you keep this flame ignited.
This inclination effects more on the lady cos once your energy level drops & you do less for wify she starts associating that maybe childbirth is associated to loss of attraction hence less importance.. and left clueless... whereas it was a part of your personality... its just that you need to make constant efforts to reach the same peak :thumbsup.

 

Hi Naksh,

It seems like both of you are not getting time for each other because of the new member in your family. Like many have mentioned,the new parents will be in an emotionally tuff state for some time.This may be that peiod for both of you. I am sure you both love each other, it is just the routine responsibilites of life that are catching up on you both. Spend more time with each other by talking and connecting more ,when the baby is asleep.


Good Luck. Hang in there. This phase wil pass.