What Is Communication Problem?

The only place one can find that almost all persons in a cine theatre or in a drama auditorium would be closely following the dialogue except those who are stone deaf .
During a lecture in a class room a teacher would often stop midway and put some question to a student so that the class is forced to listen.
I hv observed few speakers say at middle or at end of lecture "whatever I said I hope not gone over your head" .
Only very few have the knack of his audience remain riveted to his speech and make the speech in a such a way that persons remain inquisitive about what he or she is going to utter next.
In the class rooms all students may not be attentive as there mind would be reviewing incidents happend elsewhere though they be seen staring at lecturer.
The universal truth is as husband ages his listening to spouse 'diminishes' and ultimately he would be just lending a deaf ear.

If people only love their voice none can make them listen. I hv come across persons asking questions but before the other in mid sentence - this person is ready to shoot another question demonstrating his or her impatience to listen to answers.
Even with hearing aid, I hear or listen differently. When they speak in tamil I hear them as though they spoke some Latin or Greek. It is like when asked where is boss, his assistance at other end responds 'aaj mar gaya' ( today he expired) when the other man in accented hindi only said that meant "Aajmeer gaya".

 

It depends on who is talking in a classroom teacher, in a meeting with the main speaker, in a family elder or where you are supposed to listen until asked. In a debate, only when your turn comes.
It will be different in a dispute where both sides would try to win by hook or crook.
However, it is always better to listen when the other is speaking, not only from the etiquette point of view but from the making a sense point of view. It helps to form a reply.

 

The best way of communication is: BE SHORT, BE SWEET, BE GONE. wHRETHER COMMUNICATION OR READING PEOPLE LIKE THINGS TO BE SHORT. i LIKE SHORT CHAPTERS IN BOOKS , NOT ONES THAT GO FOR PAGES AND PAGES. sAME WAY WITH CONVERSATIONS, pEOPLE COMPLAIN THAT ON PJHHONE i HARDLY SPEAK A FEW WORDS. fEW WORDS ARE BETTER THAN A LONG SPEECH. tHE POINT IS, HOW EFFECTIVE THOSE WORDS ARE. Not everyone is a good or tokerant listener. so you have to be brief and uptro rhe point with mthem.

 

Dear Madam,

Thank you for your wonderful post about effective communication and lack of listening skill. Unfortunately, the schools teach how to read, write, speak but never teach how to listen. Listening skill is unique as the data comes in a sound system. By nature, I am a good reader but not a good listener while many tell me that they can listen a discourse in audio form better than reading it in a print form. I like print outs or reading it in the computer than listening an audio. Distractions are too many when you are listening.

Besides, it is difficult to have the same wave length like a speaker as his/her thought process might be different than ours and the speaker may communicate in a language that is easier for him to communicate than how we can understand. Moreover, in an office meeting or even in Parliament, most are preparing their own speech to prove a point than listening carefully.

Steven Covey in his book, "Seven Habits of highly effective people" dedicated a chapter on listening skills. He even emphasizes how important it is for the parents to listen to their children carefully. One needs to develope a mindset to receive raw data when someone speaks and analyze it later than simultaneously processing the data because when we do that, we miss out the next important point made by the speaker. If we skip listening, we may repeat what someone else said earlier. Those who are extremely analytical also end up getting lost in a conversation as they would be still processing the first few words said earlier.

Listening is different than reading. While reading, we can have logical breaks and use that time to analyze what we learned. In listening, we need to take data in and later evaluate. Moreover, attention span of each individual varies so much. For example, the White House staff said former President Trump never reads anything but he listens carefully on security briefings. They make bullet points if the staff needs to give it in writing.

In classes, afternoon classes are tough to listen if we end up having sumptuous lunch.