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What are th causes/remedies of DEPRESSION????

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by meena2, Mar 2, 2010.

  1. meena2

    meena2 Senior IL'ite

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    My cousin is 35yr old married and has 2 kids.
    She got married at 19, was love marriage against parents wish. The man is from a different caste. Her mom was dead against it but dad somehow got convinced that she would be fine with him. Anyway, mom too gave up and yielded to the daughter's desire to get married to this guy.

    Now, she has 13yr old and 9yr kids. In between both the kids she had a miscarriage. Ok that was long back and she has gotten over this trauma of miscarriage through counseling and medication.

    Her husband was short tempered and very stingy economically. She is from a really well to do family and he is from middle class family. He has no mother and his dad died couple of years after their marriage. He has a sister in US and brother in India. This guy is the eldest of all.
    Now, he has managed his anger considerably and is far far better than earlier...she says.
    They have a huge house. Dh has good job, kids are bright young and happy souls.
    He will buy her anything she wants and is understanding and behaving better than before....... All this I came to know only becos she told me.

    Lately, she has not been calling me and so I decided to go and see her. She looks so sick now. When I asked her she told me she is taking medication for depression. I asked her what is the reason for her depression and she says she does not know. It has been happening to her often. And now she is on sleep medicines since she does not get sleep for 2 days straight. I actually got scared hearing all this. I asked her to take 2nd opinion of another doctor. She said she did and both the doctors say she is undergoing depression.

    Really, I cannot figure out why she is so depressed. I asked her what she is constantly thinking about or what is bothering her. She says she does not know but her mind is always restless.

    Can you tell me what could be the cause of this depression? I can give you inputs about her family life if you need any info to draw conclusion.
     
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  2. lavii

    lavii Gold IL'ite

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    Re: What are the causes/remedies of DEPRESSION????

    wow good that you got this topic
    i am eager to check responses
    because since past couple of days i am feeling depressed cant specify exact reason but i feel so
     
  3. Priya16

    Priya16 IL Hall of Fame

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    Re: What are the causes/remedies of DEPRESSION????

    I believe the depression especially for house wife’s where the men dominates the house and women will be consider just as a servant where no voice.
    1) They don't have choice to spend money.
    2) Don’t have choice to whom to invite and not to invite.
    3) Typically these women have to keep their family distance because of men domination
    4) Shouting on wife before the kids
    5) All the time around the house and only doing domestic work.
    6) They don't know how to explore themselves and failed to understand what gives or keep them happy.
    7) Here over the entire dress ion more because these women will have no voice in the house either for their opinions or for decisions.
    8)Somtimes kids also don't give any value to mothers openion just because they learn from fathers and just ignore mom all the time.
    9)Basically no value of he existance in the house.
    These are things I can think of.
     
  4. meena2

    meena2 Senior IL'ite

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    Re: What are the causes/remedies of DEPRESSION????



    Priya, None of the above are applicable to her except that she is a stay home mom. She has all the freedom to spend however she wants, she actually has more liberty to voice her opinion with her dh, she takes lot of decisions and her dh consults with her often about things.
    She said she infact was happy in her married life. I have not heard her complaining about her dh since long.
     
  5. ProReal

    ProReal Senior IL'ite

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    Re: What are the causes/remedies of DEPRESSION????

    It could be that she is feeling lonely and unimportant.. Like her husband is busy and kids have their own lives but she has nothing much to do with her life then take care of them.... Is that possible?
    I know the feeling of isolation or loneliness could be a reason for depression
     
  6. Priya16

    Priya16 IL Hall of Fame

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    Re: What are the causes/remedies of DEPRESSION????


    I heard some movie actor was giving interview and she was telling she can't cross the road herself and she will be panic if she has to do.
    Some people they sit in the airplane and they imagine all kind of things and they will restless and can't sleep.
    Some people can't travel on the buses because what all they think is about some accident.
    May be she is restless because she might imagine something negative all the time and can't sleep properly.
    I heard typically DR treat these kind of symptoms with depression medicine. Basically to relax the nerves and give them some sleep.
     
  7. Tridev

    Tridev Silver IL'ite

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    Re: What are the causes/remedies of DEPRESSION????

    One reason which I can think of is " Her Past", depression can be caused even by remembering past events, if they are bad enough to cause depression. Even if current is good, one can slip into past easily when one hears similar stories, read such stories somewhere or finds someone familiar going through those events too.

    Her mind is "restless" as she says, that is the reason she cannot sleep properly, if her mind calms down, she will be able to sleep or get better.

    If there is combination of restlessness and depression and insomnia, I am not sure why she says, there are no reasons and she is not thinking or worrying about anything. If that is really true, she may need medical intervention from psychatrist and evaluation, it can be serious

     
    Last edited: Mar 2, 2010
  8. sita2223

    sita2223 Bronze IL'ite

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    Re: What are the causes/remedies of DEPRESSION????

    She does not know what is bothering her but her mind is restless.... looks like she has some tensions and her mind is blocking them but she can still feel its effect.

    Let me give you my own example -
    Last year has been a roller-coaster ride for me career-wise, visa-wise and financially. There have been times when I felt very restless and could not pin point on why I was being restless. At times like this, I know very well that I am under a lot of pressure and my mind blocking the tensions to give me peace, but I can still feel it.

    Solution:
    * I tell my DH that something is bothering me but I don't know what.:spin
    * He takes me out on a long drive in the car (sometimes he drives for 2-3 hours till I feel ok)
    * He talks about each and every thing that could cause me tension and explains how it can be fixed.
    * We come back home only after my mood has improved and I feel light-hearted.
    * Back at home, he makes sure my mind is not given any free time to think about the problems, so he makes me watch comedy series (like Friends, Frasier) and he cooks me dinner. :kiss

    Sometimes I like to watch Sherlock Holmes kind of episodes so that my mind will be put to use in trying to solve the mystery and far from my problems. It really works on me.:thumbsup

    I think this kind of simple remedies work when you are beginning to get depressed and will help a person to NOT fall into depression. But if a person has already gone into depression, medical help might be the best thing.
     
    Last edited: Mar 2, 2010
  9. kavya007

    kavya007 Gold IL'ite

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    Depression is not completely understood. There are caused due to hormonal changes, stressful events, negative thought patterns, postpartum blues etc. Sometimes it runs in families I also struggled with postpartum depressionf for a year. Anti-depressants and counseling did not help. Don't ask a depressed person to just snap out of depression. Its not easy for them. I took the Art of Living course and started practicing the breathing technique that they taught in the course called Sudarshan kriya. It takes about 20 minutes per day. My depression blew away in 20 days. By depression I mean the phase where you feel the gray cloud is not just going away. Yoga and pranayama do a lot of good to the body. I benefited tremendously from that course and it started a new journey in my life.

    Regards,
    Kavya.
     
  10. kinjal

    kinjal Bronze IL'ite

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    Re: What are the causes/remedies of DEPRESSION????

    im not sure how close you are with your cousine.
    it could be that something really bothering her and she is not able to share it with anyone.

    ask her to join yoga or art of living course.
    yoga really help to maintain peaceful mind.
     

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