What’s The Worst Thing Your In-laws Have Done To You?

I can relate to dress point. Even I had a hard time to convince my MIL to let me wear jeans pants when SIL wears shorts in front of her.

 

I have learnt to deal with them after some years. Also now my DH can see and understand their behavior. I have stopped staying with them. If they have some needs and ask for help we do it.

 

Seriously what is this mentality of Indian inlaws wanting to control how a dil dresses. Shld tell them "you are no one to tell me what to wear or what not to".
But I know one can't say things like that to them. Need to have a lot of guts and be ready to be branded as BAD dil by them.

 

Haha I myself don't want to wear shorts at my in laws house. SIL only wears shorts at her parents house.

 

Ah we all are sailing on same boat. Same here.
To be honest, we all blame inlaws but fail to acknowledge that the main prob is DH.
As we get married to DH and leave our everything behind, some will even sacrifice their good career to move in to DH city, some sacrifice their freedom to adjust with husband's parents and or sibling/their spouses etc.
It's DH responsibility to ensure you feel comfortable and feel his home as "your home". And set boundaries with his parents on how to interact with his wife.
Unfortunately 99% men in India fail at this and hence we wives suffer "inlaws" problems.
We women are wired internally to accomplish multitasking, to adapt ourselves easily whereever we go.
Yet husbands fail to do this and why? Because their mothers brought them up as "raja betas" or "sravan kumar" who is supposed to be "looked after (read - baby sitting of husband by his bride) once he reaches marriageable age. Till then his mommy dear will cook n feed and even probably wash his tushi! (Pun intended!).
Hence the wives suffer in rewiring their husbands and repairing them which mentally exhausts us and add to it the mil unfair expectations and demands and disrespectful treatment of their dils!

I am part of this indian patriarchy driven resentful wife too! Only thing is that now I dont bother. I channelise all my hate for them into total ignorance by reminding myself the more i get angry or hate or curse them, its gonna burn my energy and waste my time and cause me loss of peace.

 

Yes, you wear a saree or shorts, it's your wish and it's your life. Inlaws shouldn't impose how their dil dresses. Thatz my point.

 

Most annoying things my SIL and her daughter does : they are stay at our room whenever they visit us. My ILs also staying with us. We r in 2BHK house and both have A.C , but another room is in 1st floor and its staircase is outside the house. So my mil dont want her daughter and grand daughter to stay at upstairs .. so they are sleep in our room.
they dont think about our privacy. and hubby dont even utter a word. I slowly changed my H to listen to me and ask them to use the another room. Still they want us to tell them to stay at another room whenever they visit us. dont know what kind of people they are. For past 1 yr (during lockdown) his niece was stayed with us and sleep with us citing she cant sleep without AC since birth.

As usual my mil want to share our property with SIL and niece.

 

1000% correctu factu.
If I start, I will go to a great length story here.
to make it short, I have got the same treatment as the eldest DIL of eldest son. MIL thought she could control me. ME being meek took in what she said but could not say it out as i have never said no to even to my parents forget in-laws.
The worst thing ever was that my in-laws instilled a notion into my DH that girls from Bombay will pull the sons away from their parents [i have only been in b'by for 8 yrs rest schooling in TN only]. So my DH since we got married has been like stone cold whenever we were with in laws and was afraid to show even a tiny bit of affection to me in front of them , just incase they think I have him wound around my fingers.

Even now after 24 yrs DH still has that thought in him. Why do these parents even get their sons married? They can have them around their pallu right??

 

same here.
ask him how many TN girls live unitedly with their inlaws?