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What’s My Friend’s Hubby’s Problem?

Discussion in 'Friends & Neighbours' started by SeekingMind, Oct 6, 2021.

  1. SeekingMind

    SeekingMind Silver IL'ite

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    This is regarding my friend and her husband.
    They live in metro city in India. She is a teacher. He worked for about 6 yrs after their marriage. He lost the job and since 10 yrs he has been staying home. They bought a car when he was working. He tried to learn driving. Took some driving classes and got his license. One time he tripped over while walking hastily and fractured his arm. He got better but would say he can’t drive as its hurting. She tried telling him to do physio but I don’t know what happened but ultimately recently they sold off the car without using much.
    Anyway as of now after 10 yrs if staying home he is nearly 50 yrs and has not yet found a job.
    He keeps coming with some plans and at that time my friend also sounds all excited and then after few days all that is gone.

    What is his problem? I am not able to understand.
     
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  2. Tamrakshar

    Tamrakshar Platinum IL'ite

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    Househusband!? Eh? If there are crores of housewives, why can't be a few househusbands? Accept it, it's the new reality.
     
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  3. ProudIndian

    ProudIndian Gold IL'ite

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    Does he take care of kids, cooking cleaning and other housework? Is wife’s salary enough to run house?
     
  4. anika987

    anika987 Finest Post Winner

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    One of the guys I know is in the same situation as the guy you mentioned above.

    Reason is he lost his self confidence and suffering from anxiety.

    Maybe this person needs counseling.Who knows what emotional turmoil he might be going through?Since he also stopped driving..could be lack of confidence in himself.emotional factors should be considered.

    Or maybe they might be financially secure and he feels he is happy to be a househusband.
     
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  5. sandhya2020

    sandhya2020 Silver IL'ite

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    Seems he lost his confidence, and that affects the driving too.
    It's absolutely ok, there are plenty of women in such a situation. As long as both are happy with the situation, and he is ready to take care of the house(cooking, cleaning, childcare etc). then there is no issue.
    Seems his wife is also fine with the situation. Anyway, at the age of 50 it is difficult for anyone to restart career after a decades gap. If the current situation is working out for them, it is best.
     
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  6. lakshmi888

    lakshmi888 Silver IL'ite

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    AGREE with sandhya2020
     
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  7. SeekingMind

    SeekingMind Silver IL'ite

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    Thank you all for responding

    As some of you asked does he do house work take care of kids etc.,…..

    This is what I heard from my friend over the course of our often long phone conversations.
    My friend has maid who does major housework. As for cooking my friend does it. He helps as and when required only.
    I should mention this here that he doesn’t have habits like smoking or drinking. He doesn’t go out to eat in restaurants either. So that way his spending is very economical.

    But what I feel is just like other women doesn’t my friend also deserve a earning husband. Especially in our society when this is looked down. When people ask her would she not feel humiliated to tell or then she would have to lie to them. But relatives neighbors come to know already.
    Doesn’t she deserve better?
    Should he not realize that he is hurting her self respect?
    Why can’t he go out and find some job however small that is?
    Isn’t it below dignity of a man not to earn?
     
  8. anika987

    anika987 Finest Post Winner

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  9. anika987

    anika987 Finest Post Winner

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  10. anika987

    anika987 Finest Post Winner

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    Sorry guys posted in wrong thread
     

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