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Welcome To Your Own Outlet !!!

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by HariLakhera, Dec 27, 2020.

  1. HariLakhera

    HariLakhera Platinum IL'ite

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    Welcome To Your Own Outlet !!!

    Sometimes back, I surveyed on Facebook, soliciting suggestions from friends for opening a small business! As expected, all the suggestions were risky! Who needs an enemy with such selfish friends around? Hold your breath, I will explain. Don't take it seriously! We have forgotten how to laugh and the laughter clubs dotting the parks are proof enough! One needs to take pains to laugh and teach others how to laugh!

    Ok! I wanted to open a small business to supplement my meager income and survive in inflation ridden market! As a citizen of a free India, I have every right to open a business anywhere, anytime, and for anything! Why only business? Practically anything! 75 years of Independence should, at least, give this freedom to its citizens! By opening anything does not include opening the dress and stay naked! Some people have a pervert thinking!

    I mean opening a shop, clothing store, a chemist shop, restaurant, etc. May be school or hospital as they too operate as shops these days! But I am not a very ambitious man, a small shop will do and that can grow big with time!

    One friend suggested to open a tea shop and by doing that, one day can become Prime Minister! He has some hidden agenda! When I become PM he will enjoy all the benefits! I am a kind-hearted man and do not know how to say no and he knows it! Nothing will happen to him but my newfound political career will go to dogs! Worst, I may be behind the bars! The first time a PM going to jail in the history of India! This is called सिर मुंडवाते ही ओले गिरना (hailstorm on the bald head)

    Some friends suggested opening a liquor shop. First, it is not easy! One needs political patronage! Second, I know it will run into losses from day one. Every evening these rascals will sit inside, drink to their fill, make me drink, and go home! To cover the losses I will be left with only the option of selling duplicate brands! Nothing will happen to them but I will be behind the bars!

    A few friends suggested opening a Ration shop! Again difficult but possible with some bribery here and there! The difficult part is without major manipulation it can not be viable as the margin by way of commission is too little! I will have to arrange fake ration cards or BPL cards whatever they are called now, draw ration and sell in the open market! Here again, they will come, collect their monthly ration, and promise to pay tomorrow which never comes! To cover the losses more manipulation like under weighing! In effect, I will be in jail!

    There are suggestions for opening a wholesale business or petrol pump! Same problem! No profit without manipulation in a competitive market! They taking free, me manipulating, and going to jail!

    Someone suggested starting a consultancy service. There was some weight in this suggestion. I have 40 years of marketing experience behind me. The problem is that almost every street in the town is filled with consultancy services. Some have occupied Facebook itself with branches in WhatsApp, LinkedIn, YouTube, Twitter, and whatnot. All that is needed for a mobile phone. Keep in the front, open the camera in selfie mode, and start lecturing. No, not this also. Too competitive and no guarantee of returns! I may lose whatever little I have. These vagabonds want me to be a vagabond like them!

    There were suggestions to become a leader, not political, the others who work in social or trade circles like Union leader or Social reformer. There is good money there, they said. Probably they want to indirectly tell me that all unsuccessful managers either become consultants or leaders after retirement. Probably they want to say just as I have nothing to show as achievements of my working life, so will be my disciples. No point losing face at this age.

    One friend suggested becoming an astrologer or Tantric type Bengali Baba! Better still, Godman! No Baba, no! It can be too risky. Asharam and Ram Rahim are already behind the bars. These friends! All scheming to put me behind the bar!

    One well-wisher advised opening a chow min and sweet shop in the ancestral village. He says kids and their mothers like them. I know, but they will ask for credit and offer hundreds of excuses for nonpayment. If I force may charge me of anything! No way!

    By now, you must have realized that I have no dearth of enemies. There are some sincere well-wishers but they are resourceless. God forbid, if something goes wrong and I am arrested, no one will come to bail me out.

    One friend said I am a reasonably good writer. I should publish a book. I thought but who will publish an unknown writer? Even if I get it published at my cost, who will buy it? First, bow before some influential leader, get some government contribution for publishing the book and then ask some leader to launch the book and even after that no hope of anyone buying the book. Ultimately no option but to distribute the book free among relatives and friends who will accept it as an obligation with no guarantee of opening the cover. No way!

    But I am a man of determination. If I decide to do something, no one can stop me. I am not copying Slaman Khan dialogue जो एकबार ठान लेता हूँ फिर तो मैं किसी की नहीं सुनता।

    I decided to open a shop, so I have opened a shop. That's all. SHOP OF PROMISES. I promise that anyone believing in my promise will see better days अच्छेदिन। Everybody's wish will be fulfilled. No one will return empty-handed. Promise to provide Roti, (bread) Kapada (clothe) and Makan (housing), and more! All you have to do is wait! You have waited this long, you can wait a little more.
    Please do visit. Please do not embarrass me by bargaining and asking for credit.


    (So far no one promising wonderland has gone to jail, nor will go in the future. It is the most secured profession. The best part is the same promise can be presented in different packing. Old promises can be recycled. )
     
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  2. shyamala1234

    shyamala1234 Platinum IL'ite

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    Dear Hariji,
    Promising wonderland sounds good. Risk free and can mesmerise people with promises and no one would sue you if you do not fulfill them. Sapno ka saudagar also sounds good though i have not seen the movie. Can sell dreams too!!!!
    Syamala
     
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  3. HariLakhera

    HariLakhera Platinum IL'ite

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    Yes, that sounds better. Thanks for reading and feedback.
     
  4. Thyagarajan

    Thyagarajan IL Hall of Fame

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    Kudos to your Himalayan efforts in searching for a suitable entrepreneurial venture 100% risk free and no finance required. You had discovered that in such a search a funtastic enterprise which requires only tongue in cheek, stretching imagination to keep on rehashed promises after promises and maintain status without fulfilling even an iota of promises already made.
    A good jibe at it. What is that
    "It" is anybody's guess.
    Regards.
     
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  5. HariLakhera

    HariLakhera Platinum IL'ite

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    It is totally risk free. The best part is so far no one has been punished for making promises.
     
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