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Watch our Ego ....

Discussion in 'General Discussions' started by subbutr, Oct 31, 2007.

  1. subbutr

    subbutr Senior IL'ite

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    My dear friends,
    We come across certain persons of Freak Personality , Another way of Ego
    It’s really not too difficult to identify a true control freak personality.
    For the most part, they have no friends because, quite frankly, nobody can stand to be around them.
    They’re demanding, bossy, critical and manipulating.
    Their aggressive behavior is consistent, they don’t want to give up.
    They have one goal in life--to have it their way or no way!
    The need to feel in control of others is usually caused by feelings of inadequacy and helplessness.
    Controlling people are very often successful and prosperous humans, very much in control of their own lives.
    Despite this fact, they are not very good at covering up their own feelings of vulnerability.
    It would be devastating for them to have someone see them as defenseless or out of control.
    So what do they do?
    To compensate for these undesirable feelings of inadequacies, they go out on a mission to control other people’s lives.
    Putting others down has the effect of making them feel emotionally superior, which is what they crave.
    Having a positive affect on other people’s lives is not about dominance and control.
    The real power comes from nurturing people and being sensitive to their needs.
    Be aware of how you make people feel.
    If a relationship is on edge because of our behavior, take responsibility for what we are doing to cause those close to us to become distant.
    Allow ourselves to fully understand why people do not want to be around a pestering person who is critical, controlling and constantly nags.
    Lighten up and roll with the punches.
    There is nothing wrong with being attentive to details, but when it is ruining our relationships, it is time to reevaluate our behavior.
    We need to take risks if we want to learn and grow and these things are required if we want to be successful.
    Without taking risks, we tend to limit change, and change is also required if we want to be successful.
    Just as in the stock market, where higher risk investments pay higher dividends; this is true in life as well.
    Shed our inhibitions and look out for innovative, informative, useful task around us.
    Look out for this challenges from the problem itself.
    Challenging the primary assumption, or the definition of the problem, can often yield the most creative and useful ways to solve problems,

    Let's discuss more on this aspect....

    Cya.....subbu
     
    sindmani likes this.
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  2. Shanvy

    Shanvy IL Hall of Fame

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    Hi subbusir,

    Well put out post.....good analysis...and quite true...
     
  3. subbutr

    subbutr Senior IL'ite

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    Thank you dear shanvy for the observations.
     
  4. sonurashinkar

    sonurashinkar New IL'ite

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    so nice to read it......
    the words r so rightly put....

    feel like reading it again n again....
    reading types of people really interests me........n this was a great thing in that line.....

    kaash!!!!!!.....such people would really read this n could know themselves.........

    :clap

    bye,


    Madhura
     
  5. subbutr

    subbutr Senior IL'ite

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    Thank you dear Madura for the observation and kind gestures.

    A part of us doesn’t want to experience life purely and simply—the ego.

    It would not exist without the mental drama it creates.

    It exists and thrives on thoughts about the past and plans of the future.

    It constantly mulls over the story of me:
    “How’s it going for me?” “How am I going to do?” “How did I do?”

    “What do I have to do to get things to go my way?”

    Evaluations and plans are the stuff the ego feeds on, which cause it to grow, until it looms large in our consciousness, blocking out awareness of other aspects of Reality.

    When we live in the egoic state of consciousness, life is about the story and how it is going and all the worries, fears, concerns, and problems entailed in that.

    This is the ongoing drama the ego is engrossed in.

    However, there is another life living itself under or behind or beyond all of that, and that is Reality.

    Reality is unfolding beautifully moment by moment, and it allows the ego’s drama to take center stage as long as it will.

    Eventually it will get old and Reality will break through, and we will choose it over the ego’s entrancements.

    That is the beginning of a new awareness and a new willingness to realize the Self—our true nature.

    In the meantime, the ego—the me—appears to exist, although it actually only exists as a thought.

    It appears the ego is having thoughts, but the ego itself is a thought.

    This is another of the great illusions, which keeps us enmeshed in the egoic state of consciousness.

    The ego seems very real, and yet it has no substance.

    If you look very closely, you see that it is composed of thoughts about me and nothing more.

    Furthermore, these thoughts about me are constantly changing, so the idea me is not even stable or continuous:

    One moment you are clever and the next moment you are not.

    Your ideas about yourself are always changing.

    Take your self-image, for instance:

    You look different in your mind’s eye from one day to the next, depending on who you are comparing yourself to or what other ideas or beliefs are moving through your mind.

    Awaiting more discussions from our members to share few more thoughts.

    Subbu
     
  6. madhu11

    madhu11 Bronze IL'ite

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    hi subbu,

    Nice post. You have a way of analyzing things and putting it together. Thanks for posting.
     

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