Wabi-Sabi- Celebrate the imperfectly perfect.

Look at the vase, nothing so special about it, but this vase was instrumental in my blogging on this topic..

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This vase is around 6 years old, and I had just brought it out of hibernation after moving to the new space. During one of the playtimes, DD broke it by accident and I just felt bad but left it..she actually collected every single piece of that vase and stored it. During the holidays she took lot of effort and lot of time and tried to join it into one piece.(it was around 50 pieces and impossible jigsaw puzzle). and if you observe keenly you can find the cracks.

She came to me and asked me how it looks, I said it is wabi – sabi.. and she was like..Mom “ what happened to you. I just asked you a simple question and you are giving me a @@!#@! answer..” well from the moment I learnt about wabi –sabi, that is what comes into my mind, when I think of the imperfectly perfect. I know DD does not know the concept of Wabi – Sabi. so did tell her about it being nearly perfect and is to be treasured for the hard work.

Now I am sure many of you do know the concept of wabi-sabi, if not let me take the pleasure of introducing it to you, but let me also confess, that inspite of understanding the principle, it has been so difficult to define and it is said that even the Japanese do not know the exact definition..(Console myself)

Wabi –sabi is zen principal (popularity is attributed to zen) that revolves around all that is transience, while nurturing all that is authentic based on three simple facts.. Nothing lasts, nothing is finished, and nothing is perfect..

Wabi , sabi are two independent words that came to be together over a period of time. Wabi means solitude (where solitude takes a different dimension), while sabi means withered, dulled due to aging or use..

It is said that the concept of wabi sabi evolved, along with the tea ceremonies in japan, with the amalgamation of irregular, not so appealing mugs, pots mingled with the highly acclaimed prized wares. Well I am not going to tire you all much about the evolution as there are too many theories to it, and then I have to scratch my head to simplify the beautiful concept of their tea ceremonies..

I will now just share that today even the best pottery and cups used in the tea rituals have an intentional crack(?) their way of accepting and practicing wabi sabi. the Japanese philosophy of appreciating things that are imperfect, primitive and incomplete. This ancient concept of revering gracefully weathered, rusty things. Looks simple isn’t it. but it takes a lot of practice and acceptance to practice I suppose..
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Well I am not going advocate being simple and appreciate the home full of dust, or a shabby person nor about doing the interiors in wabi sabi way

I believe the principle is more profound when you relate it to accepting the perfection in imperfection.

Well there is nothing wrong in imperfection isn’t it..(That coming from a eternally struggling to be perfect person is so funny would be the reaction from my family.)

I feel the principle needs to be practiced by us when it comes to relationships and daily ways of life. Remember that nobody is perfect and the total perfection in a person is illusion.

Accepting a person’s faults, rather than expecting them to change, or taking up the task of changing them. All the time and energy invested if i transfer it to enjoy the person as he/she is and work around the faults (of course as long as they are not harmful) is a better way.. there is a wabi sabi feel to it isn’t it.

Taking care of self, not leaving us to rot..( I am sure a person like my DS will always throw a loop..) Aging with grace instead of going in search of the impossible way or not so permanent painful ways of staying young.. leaving the botox and the creams out and learning to grow as a better person and aging with an inner beauty..

I have learnt to not look for the perfect happiness, perfect children, and perfect marriage. Life with its scar, laugh lines, wrinkles, hitches, wear and tear is perfectly imperfect and I have learnt to celebrate the beauty in that. Life is too short, and I do not have the time to wait for the perfect setting.

When every one of us knows that when you encounter a too perfect person, you look too deeply for the flaw, why are we so much on the look out for the same?”

When we wax out poetry at the imperfect perfection of the moon, why not accept the same when it comes to our near and dear ones..
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The vase now sits on a table royally, I am sure it is not going to last, but that does not mean I should not enjoy it while it lasts. all things finally wear out and become redundant and that should not stop us from doing it.. .. As the singer Leonard Cohen sang

Ring the bells that still can ring
Forget your perfect offering
There is a crack, a crack in everything
That's how the light gets in.



Now, dears, I am not sure if I have conveyed what I want to, or else follow the wabi sabi principle..:biglaugh:cheers


P.S. There is always a corollary to any generally accepted theories, and there is no exception to wabi sabi.

 

dear friends,

Thanks a lot for being with me through this blog. i know i have not been so prompt in my acknowledgements in the past few months. those who are in touch with me know, i had some health glitch, then dd's board exams, new house and then the vacation.. will be back soon.

i am sure you all accept the wabi sabi me..after all that is what friends do isn't it..

thanks a lot.

 

Saras, you always have something sweet to write about. these days i do not find a lot of time to sit in front of the pc, due to health issues, hence the late acknowledgement.

do tell me how your children accepted the concept. i think you teach the primary section. will wabi sabi be too heavy...as long as they do not tell you that their handwriting is wabi sabi i am going to accept the revolution graciously.

life teaches simple lessons through all the actions and incidents around us. sometimes something clicks and i just share it with you. the vase is still sitting there..the moon is a click by my daughter..who is so crazy and a amateur at photography. i am sure you would have seen her click here.http://www.indusladies.com/forums/kids-korner/132159-my-daughters-view-through-lens.html

I have a lot of half cooked blogs..and now i am not to be blamed if i start posting more on the same genre..

thanks for all that motivation.:cheers

 

Akila, my son, says wabi sabi, when the food is not so great to his liking..so somewhere something has clicked into that teenager's brain..:rotfl..i believe the concepts are best received when they are put across simply.. a mere pat shows a lot of appreciation than a few minutes of speech in my opinion.

so true..but why have we become so..is it because of a invisible yardstick that has been set for each of us..

you hit the nail. in search of perfection, we forget to the smell the roses, miss out of the naughtiness of your kids, the little mischievous pranks, the little hugs, the little appreciation, as we are looking for the bigger picture with our eyes wide open in one direction, that is ours alone..instead, if we just reduce the expectation for a perfect world and look around with a acceptance everything looks perfect..

thanks a lot..sorry for the late acknowledgement.