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Very Stressed-always Complaining In Laws

Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by Needtobestrong, Oct 26, 2020.

  1. Needtobestrong

    Needtobestrong Platinum IL'ite

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    Worst thing that's happening is that my husband has joined them too..he thinks that his mother an godfather should comfortably sit and do nothing while I slog the whole day with health issues...if I stand continuously in kitchen preparing a dish for one hour plus he will not appreciate or acknowledge..but his mother makes some food item in 20 to 30 mins, of her choice, he will immediately start criticizing me as to why I made his mother to do everything and why i let her work in kitchen and how at her age she is suppose to take full rest...he wasn't this bad earlier but has become so recently..
     
  2. Needtobestrong

    Needtobestrong Platinum IL'ite

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    I know I'm being a very bad person but I keep thinking how many more years they will be alive and trouble me ...
     
  3. DDream

    DDream Finest Post Winner

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    Op, you are so good to be true as a DIL.

    But think smart, start giving responses wherever needed... actions more than words. Give impression that, if they criticize, even after your good efforts, they loose service. Also have private talk with your dh. It is his parents. It is his job to take care of them. Your duty is to assist. If he is unhappy with your service he can try to do a better job himself.

    Indifference, ignoring, acting life deaf, giving responses in a respectful way, focusing on your life , enjoying your life, not allowing them to control your emotions, consider them as two sick people who don't have any other job to do.., more me time, reduced interactions etc are the pathways you can select. But never allow these to influence your marriage but communicate well what you think is acceptable or not. Tell him if he wants better service he needs to respect you infront of others. Complaining about PiLs never help you. But always try to speak good about PiLs, so slowly he gets the message how they are creating issues. Now everyone is taking you for granted. Its high time to define a boundary. Also, appreciate them,when they do something good.

    You can't change them, so change your responses.
    So think and act... good luck
     
    Last edited: Nov 7, 2020
    Needtobestrong likes this.

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